Peanuts and bugs

Laundry day; my most favorite and least favorite day (as chore days go). It’s my least favorite because I have to touch all the dirty underwear while I spray them for smears grass stains.

And… after I’m done with mine I do the same thing for Noah’s. It’s also my least favorite because it generally only happens the day I wake up and realize I have absolutely no clean underwear left. That in turn means I’m praying that nobody knocks on my door for the next two hours, since I’ll be running around completely buck naked due to my refusal to actually wear smeared dirty underwear while the wash is running.

And by the way, I will answer the door that way, so time youself carefully.

On the flip side, It’s my favorite day because one, when I’m done I realize that I do have enough clothes that I don’t need to go buy a new wardrobe, and two, it means that I get to find all of Noah’s little treasures that he’s crammed into his pockets over the past couple weeks.

Today was laundry day. Yippee skippy. Literally, this list is what I found in Noah’s pockets: three peanuts, four raisins, two potato bugs, something that used to be a bug (I think maybe a smashed grasshopper?), and 40 cents worth of change.

It makes sense. Noah loves bugs. Noah loves money. Noah loves trail mix. I commend him for trying to stash away a few of his favorite things for later pleasure. I never saved bugs when I was a kid, and now I’m 30 years old with no bugs. Noah, at his rate of savings, will have more than 80,000 bugs when he graduates high school. He’ll be secure in his future because he started so young. I’ll probably be a greeter at Walmart. Oh, wait… never mind. Noah will be loaded. He can just take care of me.

Dan Pearce, Single Dad Laughing

SHARE
Previous articleRemind me never to date a girl from South Dakota
Next article“I don’t know if I have that…”
Dan Pearce is an American-born author, app developer, photographer, and artist. This blog, Single Dad Laughing, is what he's most known for, with more than 1.4 million daily subscribers as of 2017. Pearce writes mostly humorous and introspective works, as well as his musings which span from fatherhood, to dating, to life, to the people and dynamics of society. Single Dad Laughing is much more than a blog. It's an incredible community of people just being real and awesome together!