Something I often like to do when I’m out and about is to push strangers out of their comfort zones a little bit (or a lot) and try and get otherwise unhappy people laughing or smiling. This video is always incredible validation to me that what I do might just change somebody’s life, or at least their day. It has a message that is so powerful on so many levels.
I have a list of my own, but what are the messages that you take from it?
Here is my list (from the video, and also from real life):
- The world is full of sad, sad people.
- At first encounter, people will not always take your kindness as sincere. But it doesn’t take long at all for them to trust you enough to smile and appreciate what you give them.
- People at every level need validation. Validation is one of the things in this world that few people get from others.
- When somebody validates others, it does not take long for people to start congregating around that person. People love to be around validators.
- Sometimes somebody’s hidden hurt is so deep that they seem untouchable. They seem like there really is no opportunity for validation. This is never true. These people just need validation until the proper channel opens up within them.
- It is very true that one person’s sadness or rudeness can often ruin a validator. This is because validators get their validation by seeing other people be validated.
- More often than not, a shoemaker’s child will never have shoes. People very rarely validate the validator.
- Everybody needs validation. Everybody. Your kids, your spouse, your lover, your neighbor, your family members, your co-workers, your boss, your friends, strangers on the street.
- This quote is one of the most true quotes I’ve ever heard: “I went out to find a friend, but could not find one there. I went out to be a friend, and friends were everywhere.”
Go validate somebody today. It’s the most important thing you will do before the sun goes down. And remember… you are awesome. You are great. You have to be to keep coming back here!
Dan Pearce, Single Dad Laughing
PS, please share or follow. That’s what gives me validation. 
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I have been going through your entries from the start just recently, (thanks to a friend who posted your "perfection" note). I love this one, its perfect. I wish there were more people in the world that just take a moment for a kind word towards another. I have never seen that video and am so glad I have now, thanks to you.
TJ Thyne is one of my favorite actors and I've seen this at least a dozen times. It always brightens my mood and I love the message that it sends.
I'm not going to write a list following watching this...
What I am going to do is:
One: Tell you that I'm smiling while crying as I write this. :-)
Two: Tell you that somehow...I *needed* this...today, this morning, right now...more than anything else.
Three: Share the joy I got from it with everyone I meet today, and to try to continue that chain of joy onward from right now.
Thank you.
Wow, this video brought tears to me eyes! How awesome is that? Thanks for sharing!
I love this! LOVE, LOVE, LOVE this! Thanks for sharing.
I love this video. My sister showed it to me years ago. I needed to see it again, Thanks.
I loved this. I am volunteering as a props person at community theatre this weekend, and I can't wait to get out there and validate some fantastic people. Thanks. Just discovered your blog today, really like it.
I loved the dude, the beating heart, the dog (I have a pit mix too....go figure...my life journey's a lot like that chick's .... lol), the story, the whole clip! :)
Someone once told me, to validate someone means that when they look in YOUR eyes, they see an amazing reflection staring back at them.
Cool post Dan- good on ya!
Ooooh, I like that quote! Thanks for the comment Emily!
This is new to me. So when I say to one of the kids, "Way to go! Next time why don't you try and spill chocolate syrup all over the floor, too, Slick." Is that validating? No? I know, it's the tone of voice, isn't it. Ok, let me try again. "Way to go! Next time why don't you try and spill chocolate syrup all over the floor, too, Slick." How was that? Better? I'm starting to get the hang of it now. Thanks for all your wonderful "advise", Dan. You are so "helpful" and "encouraging". Nice, huh. I'm awesome and so are.... (Sorry. I'm struggling here.) YOU. YES! I did it. Whew! That was tough.
Langela, it felt good, didn't it. Haha.
I have always believed in this!!!! Trust me, in my line of work I spend my days telling people how wonderful they are, that if I were to write a book about each of them they would be a best seller. I found a little bright spot on the internet last month, operationbeautiful.com. I wish I had thought of that one.
Thank you for sharing, we can all make a difference, one smile at a time!!! ^_^
So, waht do you do? I'm intrigued. Very cool website, thanks for posting!
I am a speech pathologist, gives me plenty of time to give positive feedback to my clients, they are worth it!
Sorry, my editor just looked this reply over and found a small discrepancy. ^_^
At work I have many opportunities that come my way for giving positive remarks.
Hmmm, must be eating and reading and typing all at the same time, sheesh!!
I need your services. I have a habit of mumbling. Seriously.
Hmmm, methinks you are fibbing me a little, ^_^ I do believe sir, you have mastered the art of language, and attend to it very well
Haha. Trust me. When I'm sleepy, my words are very incoherent! Thanks though, that's one of the best compliments I've had.
I work for the Post Office. I work 6 days a week, cover extra shifts when we have call outs, and dispite being there 8 years, as the senior sub carrier, I won't make a regular position for at least 3 more years due to the hiring freeze. I step in and do managemnet work ( without pay) to ensure fairness and that everyone gets out on the road and back safely. I have yet to hear a sincere thanks or I appreciate you from my boss. The other carriers look at me like I'm nuts when I thank them for showing up on a Saturday, or taking extra work when we have 3 open shifts. I have one guy at work, next in line for regular after me, that hugs me and says thanks for being who I am. THAT is why I enjoy going to work everyday. THAT tiny bit of Validation, has kept me, for lack of a better term, from going postal.
As for you, I read, I comment, I follow. Enjoy your validation. :) -J
Wow, thanks for posting Julianna! It's amazing what the tiniest bit of validation can do for somebody. Every so often, I send a personal email out to my co-workers telling them I'm thankful for what they do. A few months ago one of them walked into my office and told me "I just want you to know that I still have that email you sent me, and I look at it sometimes and it makes me happy".
You're too awesome for words. Thanks again.
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I have watched this nearly 100 times since I saw it. I was introduced to it through the "Bones" facebook page, but after seeing it, I wanted to show it to everyone I know. Every time, I know how it ends, but the emotions are up and down all the way through. I wish I could carry it with me everywhere I go, showing it to people in line at the store or sitting at the doctors office. This is what we all need.
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