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You Just Broke Your Child. Congratulations.

Young Child Looking Sad

Dads. Stop breaking your children. Please.

I feel a need to write this post after what I witnessed at Costco yesterday. Forgive me for another post written in desperation and anger. Please read all the way to the end. I know it’s long, but this is something that needs to be said. It’s something that needs to be heard. It’s something that needs to be shared.

As Noah and I stood in line to make a return, I watched as a little boy (he couldn’t have been older than six) looked up at his dad and asked very timidly if they could buy some ice cream when they were done. The father glared him down, and through clenched teeth, growled at the boy to “leave him alone and be quiet”. The boy quickly cowered to the wall where he stood motionless and hurt for some time.

The line slowly progressed and the child eventually shuffled back to his father as he quietly hummed a childish tune, seemingly having forgotten the anger his father had just shown. The father again turned and scolded the boy for making too much noise. The boy again shrunk back and cowered against the wall, wilted.

I was agitated. I was confused. How could this man not see what I see? How could this man not see what a beautiful spirit stood in his shadow? How could this man be so quick to stub out all happiness in his own boy? How could this man not cherish the only time he’ll ever have to be everything to this boy? To be the person that matters most to this boy?

We were three from the front now, and the boy started to come towards his dad yet again. His dad immediately stepped out of the line, jammed his fingers into his son’s collar bones until he winced in pain, and threatened him. “If you so much as make a sound or come off of that wall again, I promise you’re going to get it when we get home.” The boy again cowered against the wall. This time, he didn’t move. He didn’t make a sound. His beautiful face pointed down, locked to the floor and expressionless. He had been broken. And that’s how his father wanted it. He didn’t want to deal with him, and breaking him was the easiest way.

And we wonder why so many of our kids grow up to be screwed up.

I’m going to be blunt. People see my relationship with Noah, and quite often put me up on a pedestal or sing my praises for loving him more than most dads love their own kids.

Damn it. I don’t understand that, and I’ll never understand that. Loving my son, building my son, touching my son, playing with my son, being with my son… these aren’t tasks that only super dads can perform. These are tasks that every dad should perform. Always. Without fail. There is nothing special about me. I am a dad who loves his son and would literally do anything for his well-being, safety, and health. I would gladly take a rake in the face or a jackhammer to my feet before I cut my own son down or make him feel small.

[sigh] I am far from a perfect dad. And I always will be. But I’m a damn good dad, and my son will always feel bigger than anything life can throw at him. Why? Because I get it. I get the power a dad has in a child’s life, and in a child’s level of self-belief. I get that everything I ever do and ever say to my son will be absorbed, for good or for bad. What I don’t get is how some dads don’t get it…

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11379 comments
WayneKimberly
WayneKimberly



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NoMoreChildAbuse
NoMoreChildAbuse

 I am wondering, did you do anything to help this child? Did you follow them out, get a license plate number...ANYTHING? Did you speak up and let the man know he was out of line? I have spoken up before when I saw a child was not being treated properly, I have also called the police to protect children, I will do it every time, no questions asked. That child obviously lives a horrible life and someone needed to step in and help him.


My father was a wonderful man, I lost him at the age of 12, but he used to take us camping ALL the time. He took us fishing and I remember digging the worms and cleaning the fish. I always wanted to go hunting, but he would never take me. I am 50 years old now and I know why he never took my hunting, it was to protect me from the images of the animals being shot and killed. I think he knew that it would some how scar me, though it never did with the fish. 


I am glad that you have a wonderful relationship with your son, he will be a good person by following your example!

HemipShyl
HemipShyl


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HemipShyl
HemipShyl

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AndrewMark1
AndrewMark1

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nouseemailitisold
nouseemailitisold

Thank you for sharing this. You have given me some hope. See I am turning 16 and my parents have been divorced for a little more than half my life. I live with my mother and brother but I still have to see my father a few hours every other weekend. He was very abusive physically and verbally. I can't really remember a lot before I was 13, but there are still things I can remember. I remember him always being on his computer playing RPGs(while my mom went to work and supported us) and almost never coming when I needed him,hurting us, and never being well a dad to depend on. I would always try to seize any moment I could to go with my mom to work just to escape even though I was leaving my brother. When we would come home, my brother would have a new bruise or something. But what makes matters worse with the abuse of my brother, he used to have at least a hundred seizures nearly everyday and has almost died. No matter what excuse my father gave for their being another mark on him, it just made anger and pain fester within me. He used to all me a liar and manipulator starting when I was just a toddler. When my parents fought I tried to run in my room and hide. I always had to be careful with what I said because of the consequences of the slightest of things. Now I try whatever I can to not go over there, but it is very difficult because now I have three half-brothers that I adore and do anything for. When I do go over there, I try to show them love and try my hardest to not let them turn out like him. The things of the past still haunt me today though. I have the hardest time with anything that has to do with my opinion or any debate. I have an immediate shut down and start to freak. I have very bad panic attacks and my asthma like to tag along and make it worse. I can be very uncomfortable with men especially when I am alone and "cautious" (I will jerk at the slightest movements) and am always questioned to why I am acting so weird. I am terrified of what will happen with me and my future. I am so scared that something may happen down the road and I fall love with a guy that seems awesome but really is just like my father. Nothing is going to happen until I am married and out of college but, I am scared that I may go wrong with my child(ren) and mess there lives up. I don't want to be like that. And I thank God that I don't live with him anymore. I also want to thank Him that he has recently put a man in my life that wants to be a father figure for me even if we are in different states and cares for me enough to make me feel just a little bit special , and is a man of God I can look up to! I really want to thank God that there are people like you Mr. Pearce. Thank you for being a father that is there for their child and doing right by them! Thank you for being the kind of person that is sensitive to that kind of stuff! Your son is going to turn out wonderfully. I know you said that your not a perfect dad, hey nobody's perfect, but you sure are an AWESOME DAD! 

KennethLaura
KennethLaura

After been in relationship with a guy for 3 years,he broke up with me, I did everything possible to bring him back but all was in vain, I wanted him back so much because of the love I have for him, I begged him with everything, I made promises but he refused. I explained my problem to someone online and she suggested that I should contact a spell caster that could help me cast a spell to bring him back but I am the type that don't believed in spell, I had no choice than to try it, I meant a spell caster called Dr, Aduwawa and I email him, and he told me there was no problem that everything will be okay before three days, that my ex will return to me before three days, he cast the spell and surprisingly in the second day, it was around 4pm. My ex called me, I was so surprised, I answered the call and all he said was that he was so sorry for everything that happened, that he wanted me to return to him, that he loves me so much. I was so happy and went to him, that was how we started living together happily again. Since then, I have made promise that anybody I know that have a relationship problem, I would be of help to such person by referring him or her to the only real and powerful spell caster who helped me with my own problem and who is different from all the fake ones out there. Anybody could need the help of the spell caster, his email: ([email protected]) or you can call him  on +2348112019701, you can email him if you need his assistance in your relationship or anything. CAN NEVER STOP TALKING ABOUT YOU SIR.

Brice
Brice

When asked what you would do if it was your last day to live, it almost always involves spending time with family and loved ones, especially your spouse and kids.  If that is so important and so valuable that you would give up your entire last and final day to do it, why not enjoy it everyday?  Your time with them can be the most valuable gift and investment.

GabrielAnderson1
GabrielAnderson1

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h Yackley
h Yackley

Thank you for sharing this -- I have had the honor of having a wonderful dad who, throughout the years, in the midst of encouraging to do my best, always adds "I'm so proud of you, not for what you've done, impressive as that is, but who you are." He loves me and my sisters equally (though tells each of us in turn that we are his favorite). 


I think another huge thing to address is the fact that the way that a dad treats his wife is one of the most influential things in a child's life. My parents love each other, and do what they can - as a team - to help us live successful lives. It saddens me that so many of my friends have broken families. I'm convinced that mine would be the same if it were not for God's grace and help to shape my parents and my sisters and I to be the people that we are: definitely not perfect, but at least we love each other :) 

godfrey002
godfrey002

I'm glad to know there are dads out there like you, I'm lucky I never had children so I could end the cycle of abuse. I grew up with a father who could be very scary and shaming, he was habitually beaten by his father and didn't want his children to have the same experience, unfortunately he had no concept that verbal and emotional abuse were really abuse. He berated us routinely especially me since I was a boy, shaming us and calling us vial names and constantly threatening me with beatings or shaking me when I made him angry, then telling me I shouldn't have made him angry (hence his behavior was my fault). Even after a few therapists I'm still screwed up and full of self hatred, constantly trying to tell myself I'm not a sissy or a stupid little shit.


It's good that you know how lucky you are to have that precious little soul to shape and mold into someone good and healthy, I hope they realize the same thing when they become a dad.

Natalie
Natalie

I agree fully with this post. I have seen and known my share of dad/and moms alike, that need to read this and I wish it would help. For some it is too late but I hope this helps others to take a good look at their children. 

My husband is not perfect, he has those days that he needs to be alone when he gets home but most days when he gets home, even when he is ready to go right to sleep, he plays with the kids until it is time for them to go to bed. He makes sure they know he loves them every day and he treasures every moment he gets with them and wishes he had more time to spend with them.

JenniferHilsingerAltman
JenniferHilsingerAltman

I agree this story is sad, but everyone has bad days.  I know there are some days that people might see me with all 4 of my kids and I'm stressed and I might yell...am I proud of it?  No? But it happens.  I strive to be a very patient and understanding mom, but some days are better than others, no one is perfect.  But thanks for the reminder that we all can try a little harder.  

MARRIEDmomPissedOff
MARRIEDmomPissedOff

Maybe there was a backstory. Maybe the kid had been horrible in aisle 4. I assume that, as a divorced single dad, you have the luxury of "time off" from being a parent when your son is with his mother. Perhaps if you had been such a wonderful dad who had the right to cast stones at others, you might have done what was necessary to keep your marriage intact. Or do you think examples of parents who love each other don't matter? I'm not impressed.

MercedesWilliams
MercedesWilliams

I completely agree and am touched by your message! I have an amazing father that encouraged my questions and showed me how to find my own answers. :)

laura6168
laura6168

My husband is a dad in all senses of the word. He grew up without a father, not because of some awful tragic event but because his father didn't care to be a dad. He grew up and became the father his wasn't/isn't. Yes he gets frustrated and yells, yes he gets short on patience but he is the first to tell them how much he loves them, how much they've made his life complete. They are two years old and they call him their best friend. There is nothing in this world sweeter(and sexier) then a man that is truly a dad.

mominarizona
mominarizona

This is a great reminder to parents, moms and dads. I'm a mom of 4, and each day I try, but I must say, I always thought I'd be a better mom. My father was not a good dad, but my mom loved being a mother. I thought I'd be like her and I purposely tried to find a husband who was opposite of my father, and he is awesome with our kids! But my surprise was once my oldest children got out of toddler stages and more difficult, I am the one who struggles to control myself and my words. Some days from the out side, people think I'm super mom, but there have been many days when an on looker probably thought I don't deserve my children as well. I'm working on it, and appreciate this lesson of not breaking your child's spirit. Good parenting does not just naturally come to most I think, but it's important to recognize failings and try to do better with with each day.

Chris Mucklow Meyer
Chris Mucklow Meyer

No parent is perfect, but your post brings up many good points.  Parents lose patience.  But discipline done when angry or impatient in my very humble opinion, only teaches more anger and more impatience in the world.  Kids need direction and discipline. They crave it.  But "beating them down" especially in a public place teaches many things, and they are mostly bad.  Don't teach them that Dad or Mom is a bully because then they think that bullying is OK and maybe turn around and bully another child at school to vent their own anger.  

Monkey see, monkey do.  And it's very possible you will "break them" down enough to be a victim of bullying.  

"The greatest exercise we will ever do is reaching down and lifting someone else up."  ~Bill Phillips

NicoleSilverWolfPennetta
NicoleSilverWolfPennetta

OK, I'm not saying what this dad did was right. I am saying, what's the rest of the story? Is it possible that this child, previous to your seeing him was acting like a brat? I get compliments all the time on how well behaved my children are. But I still have to yell at them, all the time. When at the grocery store, I tell my son (7 years old) to stand against a wall near the register I'm using, and not to move, make noise or touch anything. Because he could break something, annoy someone else, get in someones way etc. whilst I'm busy trying to get us out of the store. Sometimes as a parent, you just want 5 minutes of silence, and kids don't understand that, so you get frustrated. Again, no he shouldn't have jabbed him in the collarbone, but making him stand against the wall is no big deal. Telling him to be quiet is not the end of the world. I think this is a mix of normal/over-reaction. I do this myself, jumping to conclusions about how people treat their kids, but I also say quite frequently, you don't know the whole story, so don't jump yourself.

JennKing1971
JennKing1971

I was raised by a great dad who let me take apart the toaster and then bought a new one when WE couldn't put it back together. He also took me fishing at 5:30am and out for breakfast at 6:00am when I got bored. He challenged me to learn, to explore and to fail. My husband was raised by a similar man and is now raising our girls to be amazing humans. There are GREAT dads out there and I'm eternally grateful to be related to three of them!

0130
0130

I love it!  I hate when I see parents being mean to their kids in public bc you know it is soooo much worse when they are at home.  My husband and I were not blessed with children yet and are going through fertility treatments to help us live your dream of becoming parents. These 2 lines of this blog really had me:

Maybe the truth is that a lot of dads don’t deserve their kids.

Maybe the truth is that a lot of dads aren’t really dads at all.


Those lines really hit home with me bc people always tell me I am a mom with no children and I truly feel that way and I know my husband is a father with no children. 


I loved the blog but hated that something like this even needs to be discussed as an issue. 

Steps are people too
Steps are people too

This points back to something I learned a long time ago...  Any man can be a father.  It takes a GREAT man to be a Dad.  GOOD parents know the difference between babysitting their children, and PARENTING them.

llbaatz
llbaatz

I loved your article!!  I find your comments to be honest, forthcoming, and Passionate!  I wish all dads could be like you and I thank my husband for being this kind of dad.  We always looked at our daughter as a gift entrusted to us by God that we needed to take good care of, nurture, and teach!!  The caped crusader must have read another article or have some issues with his own parents to be so full of hate and sarcasm.  Please keep writing with such passion and emotion.

TrishAnn1
TrishAnn1

I love this article! Very well written. But the word Dad should definitely apply to all parents. I've seen my fair share of ass bag mothers who don't deserve to be mother. People who smack their children in the middle of the mall for talking to loudly of walking to fast. Disgusts me. Too many people treat children like their a nuisance. And considering how many people can't even physically have children - each day should be treasured. Our community lost a little 5 year old boy yesterday to a rare form of brain cancer - and it really makes you appreciate what you have. Congrats on being an awesome dad!!! 

thecapedcrusader
thecapedcrusader

What a bunch of horseshit.  Get off your high horse.  Not only is this insulting to the majority of dads out there, implying that we don't treat our kids with kindness let alone lavish attention, praise and guidance on them, but you also imply that only Dads do this by directing this at one half of the parental unit.  Weak.

You act as if you're the only one who can see in the land of the blind.  I laughed out loud at this part:

"People see my relationship with Noah, and quite often put me up on a pedestal or sing my praises for loving him more than most dads love their own kids." 

Do they throw rose petals at your feet, or just lay palms down before your donkey?

This blog post was disgusting.  Grow up.  If you think you're a saint for spending time with your kid, and you see fathers hating their kids everywhere you go, that says more about your world view than the reality the rest of us live in.

By the way, way to step in and chastise the actual person who was abusing their kid (if it actually happened) instead of waiting to run home and yell at all the dads who DIDN'T do this just so you could get the clicks.  Nice one, Superdad.

jinx63
jinx63

I recently posted a meme that said "Let's raise children that don't have to recover from their childhood."  At 51 I am still recovering from mine.  This applies to everyone who deals with kids, dads, moms, grandparents, brothers, sisters, uncles, aunts... you are raising these children, you add or take away from their self worth every single day...with your words and your actions or your lack or words or actions.   I have a 14yo daughter with alopecia areata..her hair falls out, sometimes she is bald.  However, she does not hesitate to stand up in class to answer a question or challenge some broad all-inclusive statement a teacher makes that she disagrees with, or walk across a stage in a packed gymnasium as a tiny 6th grader 6 times with no wig to accept the awards she receives for being a good student and athlete and peer to her fellow classmates.  She just convinced almost 50 children in a small town in southern Indiana to sign you for a Young Democrats club... again -- in southern INDIANA..  LOL She knows she is beautiful for who she is, that she is smart and talented and loved unconditionally by many, and that she deserves it.  When I watch her I am proud because I know that despite my lousy childhood, I am getting something right, and helping form this beautiful, together, loving kid, who is going to be a great mom to my grandkids one day....  If you had a bad childhood,  you know what not to do... You are deciding who your child will be with your actions and the words you say... and you will never do anything more important.

PaulAllee
PaulAllee

Gee, thanks for the Dad lesson. Sanctimonious twerp.

JenniferMcDonald
JenniferMcDonald

Although I am biased, my  husband is a  great father. His little man is everything to him, and the love he exudes reflects in my son's eyes. He idolizes his Daddy. My husband is a U.S. soldier; no matter how demanding his job is, he always has time to play with and teach  and guide our son. Even while deployed, any chance he gets from his 16+ hour days, 7days a week, he calls to talk or video chat. He takes time from his much needed sleep to do  so, because  our son is his priority. From fishing, to riding  his bike, to alphabet flashcards (our son is a pre-schooler), wrestling, and reading bedtime stories, when  home, he is involved in everything.  My son knows he is loved, protected, and cherished (by me as well); the way it should be.  It shows in how happy, confident, and respectful he is. Boo to oppressive, bully parents. Kudos to loving, teaching, guiding parents everywhere. 

LeverneMuise
LeverneMuise

Very well written and said. I know many good Fathers like you. My Dad was one, My brothers their children, and my son is my grandson's super hero. I also work with parents and see daily ones like you seen at Costco. I hope we make a difference and improve the parenting and family lives we touch each day. Don't feel like a coward for not saying something to that Dad at Costco, if you had said something with the best intentions, and it would have made that little boys life better for a few minutes. I guarantee he would have paid for your words when he got home. A real Dad is all you said and more. Unfortunately there are a lot of broken dads out there that continue the cycle with their broken children. Thank you for your frankness and honesty.


TemplinSandi
TemplinSandi

Very well written ...Sad to seen a man treat that child so badly ....you should have followed him to his car and written his license plate down and called Family Child Services to investigate ...Sounds like this child needs an advocate to help him out ...Hope a teacher will help him.  Pray for children like this boy. 

JasonGroves1
JasonGroves1

It should be parents, not just dads. No offense, Dan...but this is a bit insulting to the dads out there fighting to be seen as equals. Are we all perfect? Nope. Is anyone? Nope. I've seen plenty of moms do the exact same things you have written about in this particular entry. I'm saddened by it. Have i ever yelled at my kids? Yep. Have i ever swatted one on the butt? Yep...but only on behest of my now ex wife. She instructed ...no, demanded...that i be the one to do it. I hated it. I was also emotionally abused by my ex wife. Society scoffs at that, or thinks me less of a man. From the moment we seperated, I've not used any physical punishment. I've not berated my childten for anything. I discuss and coach and still get my point across. It's not difficult. My kids are well behaved, polite, and respectful.

My issue here, is that you are contributing to a stereotype. Not every dad acts the way the idiot at Costco did. Walk around Wal-Mart and watch the moms in action.

singledadsfightingfather
singledadsfightingfather


Replace every word "DADS" with Parents, and with Teachers, and Principals.... Aunts and Uncles It takes a city to raise a child Lets not just blame the fathers, when its mothers, Courts, and social workers keeping GOOD fathers away from the children and the GOVERNMENT screwing with the education systems...... let's break the social norms and STOP BLAMING FATHERS how about that!!
~Frank~

Womi
Womi

You Cheated On Your Boyfriend And Now You Want Him Back;
What Makes An Ex Boyfriend Want To Come Back After A Breakup?; www.quickrevengespell.com
How To Prevent A Breakup With Your Boyfriend When You Know It’s Coming; www.quickrevengespell.com
Desperation 101- How To Get Your Ex Boyfriend Back Without Looking Desperate; www.quickrevengespell.com
How To Get Your Ex Boyfriend Back With Reverse Psychology; www.quickrevengespell.com
Using Male Psychology To Get Your Ex Boyfriend Back; www.quickrevengespell.com

PamelaKorstad
PamelaKorstad

I love the passion you have to be a great man who makes a difference other's lives while at the same time be a living example to those who are still growing and will hopefully model their lives after you. The cycle of "ruling with a fist" instead of the heart dad's needs to end.


CarleenaJudd
CarleenaJudd

I am leaving this up on the computer for my husband to read.  I think reading this will help him to understand what a great dad he is, I know it opened my eyes to all the amazing things he does for and with my children.  Of course, he is't perfect, none of us are, but he tries and he loves his children with all his heart.

MickeySticks
MickeySticks

Sad that most dad who NEED to read this will not. I have it bookmarked so that if I ever run across a dad who needs to read it (like the one you encountered at Costco), I can cut and paste it. I am guilty of most of the crimes against my kids mentioned herein, maybe to a lesser degree than most, but it definitely stirred my heart to see myself in print. I will endeavor to be a superhero to my 3 boys and my little girl. And I won't be silent when I see someone in public breaking his (or her) child's spirit. Thank you for the inspiration.

lousy dad
lousy dad

A lot of good points made here.  I for one cannot answer yes to any of them.  Have I given my 2 children the best of my time? No, I allow myself to get so absorbed in work and home chores that I frequently leave them to their own devices or to rely on my wife for time.  Have I ever said something that could have been hurtful? Not intentionally, but even the wrong tone of voice can have the same effect.  One example I am thinking of now is my 11 year old son was having problems with his new laptop almost daily.  Instead of cherishing he thinks I could fix even Humpty Dumpty, I snapped and said, I am starting to regret getting this thing.  And with my daughter, who has loved getting back rubs since she was a baby, (it helps her to fall asleep), if she comes into my room and asks me to tuck her in and rub her back after she should have been asleep already, I tell her she is just looking for excuses to stay up late.  Who knows, maybe she is afraid of something and just needs to feel protected.  So all this time I have been patting myself on the back for doing things like volunteering in their school, coaching their sports teams, teaching them woodworking, I have failed where it is most important. After reading this and taking a long hard look in the mirror, I have realized too many missed opportunities.  Like how they trip over each other when I get home to see which one gets to hug me first.  Little things like that I took for granted.  No more! I will be saving this and reading it regularly to remind me of what I should and can be, and WILL be! Thank you SLD for the gut check.  I will now dry the steady stream of tears, go wake up my 2 precious gifts and give them a big hug.  

one mother
one mother

Thank you Dan for wake up call !!! I am a mother, and often we are no different from dads :( I am not proud of many harsh words I said, but I am happy that I had enough courage to appologies for them and teach my daughter that people are human and even parents can do mistakes.



rockinboxes2014
rockinboxes2014

Thank you soooooo much I have tears, I love my son and daughter very much and you are absolutely right, they are our gifts and we encourage and tell them why when we say no, however offering other alternatives etc... My children are my life and will grow up with the respect to love one another and people alike............This was AWESOME! This is a shot at Niagara Falls of my children and my girlfriend... :D Cheers 

MistyEllenMikes
MistyEllenMikes

Definitely not something that should be directed only at men.  And really, I don't like the implication that society should not notice and reward good fathers.  The problem isn't so much that society is recognizing a good father as doing something out of the ordinary, as it is that it /fails/ to recognize that good mothers are doing something extraordinary, too.  There are just as many lazy, mean, careless mothers as there are fathers.  It's just that when women are good mothers, society tends to treat them as though they are fulfilling some kind of biological programming, and therefore what they do is not as impressive as what a good father does.  The fact is, loving your children is /not/ biologically programmed.  Keeping them alive is, but there's a big gap between keeping them alive and loving them.  So yes, SDL /deserves/ the praise he gets for being a good father.  But lets also praise the good mothers out there, and recognize that a mother who treats her child with kindness and patience is just as extraordinary as a father who does so.

Robin
Robin

Not sure that this should be solely directed at men, it should be directed at parents.  Each and everyone of us has a duty to be the best parent we can be.


crystal
crystal

I'd like to leave a positive comment. My husband is one of the greatest dads I have ever seen. He genuinely enjoys playing with our two children (5 and 2) every day. He is incredibly loving and affectionate with the kids every day. Nothing comes before the family for him and we all know that. There really are super dads our there and I'm lucky enough to be married to one of the best.

wvmmrh
wvmmrh

I spank my child every chance I get..i smack  him in the eyes with  a razor sharp tongue and sometimes i smack him in the back of his lil head with a fresh trout..As a   family man that is half Hispanic half American indian and part terrier,i feel it's my duty to acrobatically throw my son against the wall of the cave in order  to subside my tension..but only during late night wih jimmy fallon.. maybe letterman on tuesday nights..i tend to use thick tree branches on his little buttox when i get a little angry in the morning..if it's after noon between 3and 5pm  when he makes me mad i make him sit in  a corner for an  hour listening to the most wonderful time of the year by johnny mathis..17 times...but  i don't believe in hand spanking..that's cruel.

nouseemailitisold
nouseemailitisold

@MARRIEDmomPissedOff            

 Hey, really? There are sometimes (and I am NOT making a excuse, so don't say I am -_-) where no matter how hard you try, it just ain't going to happen. Though I have no experience because I am a teenager and don't plan on anything of the sort until after college, there are so many marriages that I have seen fallen apart for different reasons. Some were stupid some "excusable", some fixed some not so much. You know what, you right. Maybe the child was severely misbehaving before that, maybe he wasn't. The world may never know 0o0! BUT THAT'S NOT THE POINT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Stop trying to be Mrs. Persnickety Snoop and seem cool and point out this stuff. Cause your not. He is just trying to make a point that dads (mothers too) hold a great power in a child's life and to not abuse it. God forbid he post a message that could change a child's life and possibly help mend a marriage. He didn't know what happened before hand and you DON'T know every little detail that happen with his marriage. He's teaching his child to not be in a relationship that makes him unhappy (and not because of petty stuff, I'm talking seriously so don't go there). So please, please, do us all a favor and don't be mean. And judging by your name, I'm guessing you are not in a pleasant marriage. Maybe I'm wrong. But IF you are, don't take it out on others. It's not pretty. At least he got out of a marriage that wasn't really working out. OR if you are a happily MARRIED mom that's pissed of with him demonstrating how to be a decent father and that just wants to come on here and make single divorced parents feel bad. Leave! There is no reason for you to be on here. Go be a marriage councilor. Make a blog about it. Just don't ruin someone else's guidance. I don't know you (and I am tired and not in the most happiest moods with you right know, and this is not be extremely Christianly of me to post this much vent) but I love you. Please be a friendly person and carry on my wayward sister, and be HAPPY!

P.S. I was being serious about becoming a marriage councilor if you feel that your marriage is going great. People need it! ;) 

TrishAnn1
TrishAnn1

@thecapedcrusader I'd hate to be your kid...jackass. 

MickeySticks
MickeySticks

@wvmmrh I feel stupider for having read your reply. 30 seconds of my life I'll never get back. Thanks.

thecapedcrusader
thecapedcrusader

@TrishAnn1 Why?  Because I know horseshit when I read it?  This guy wrote the most self-serving blog I've ever read, setting himself up as the gold standard of fatherhood while insulting the rest of us.  He lives in a fantasy world if he thinks this is the norm and odds are, he probably made this whole thing up to get the clicks. 

Good for him, but shit writing.  He offers a shallow point of view and takes a position on an issue he made up that EVERYONE agrees with.  It's just weak trash.

TonyaMeehan
TonyaMeehan

@MickeySticks @wvmmrh

seriously... that whole comment made me sick to my bones. either wvmmrh doesnt have a child... or ... well... lets just hope he doesnt have a child.