Sometimes the comments that come in after a post are far better than the post itself. I’d say the “Noah’s Traumatization” post definitely fits into that category. The following “traumatizations” were stories that you submitted in the comments of that post or via email.

  • I stuck a dried pea up my nose when I was little. My neighbor’s kid stuck a Light-Bright peg up his nose.
  • My sister once had a pinto bean stuck in her ear. She claimed she was doing a magic trick for our brothers.
  • My daughter stuck an M&M up her nose. She came into the room and kept saying her nose hurt. Blue stuff was dripping from her nose. It took forever for her to blow it out, and she then wanted to eat the M&M.
  • My four year old stuck a HUGE nerd candy up his nose and it started to melt in there, burning the inside of his nostril.
  • My daughter stuck a polly pocket shoe up her nose. Three weeks before that, she stuck two Pixos in her ear. We had to make an emergency trip to the acute care clinic.
  • Our daughter stuck 6 corn kernels up her nose, one of which ended up in her sinus cavity requiring a trip to an ear/nose/throat specialist.
  • At the age of 3 my daughter took a price sticker and stuck it up her nose. There was no blowing it out and I couldn’t reach it with tweezers so to the E.R. we went. Took 3 nurses and me to hold her down for the Dr to pull it out with special long tweezers.
  • My sister stuck a red hot up her nose when we were little. She screamed her head off for about 15 minutes. We were at the circus and it disrupted the entire thing for a short while until they extracted it.
  • When my brother was little he stuck the wheel off a matchbox car up his nose. He also tied Christmas tree tinsel around his privates, then ran around the house screaming that it was gonna fall off because he couldn’t pee.
  • My friend shoved a green crayon up his nose when he was seven years old. He was afraid to tell his parents what had happened. He dug to get it out, but pushed it into his sinuses and kept quiet. 30 years later he had a massive cold… was blowing his nose, and out flew a perfectly intact 1.5 inch green Crayola crayon!
  • My husband stuck the eraser-end of a pencil up his nose when he was 7, & when he pulled it out… no eraser. He told his mom who said, “Just go blow your nose.” When he was18, same thing, he had a cold and blew his nose. He looked down to see… THE ERASER!
  • When I was two, I broke a bead necklace, and stuck a pretty red bead up my nose. On the way to the hospital I kept sneezing. Every sneeze whistled because of the hole in the bead.
  • I got my head stuck in a fishbowl when I was three. The fire department came out and everything. After laughing for 10 minutes, they somehow managed to get it off of my head, giving me a plastic fire hat for being so brave!
  • My sister had to visit the ER after I tried to teach her how to launch a peg from a beg board from her nostril.
  • I accidentally broke the quill end of a feather off in my sister’s ear trying to wake her up.
  • My son has stuck legos, Yogos, and a dime in his nose. I’ve also found teddy grahams in his ear.
  • My brother used to eat stickers as a kid.
  • My 2-year old daughter once stuffed a single-peg lego up her nose. She kept saying her nose hurt. I thought she had the sniffles or a little cold until she sneezed a giant sneeze (at the dinner table) and a big blob of snot spewed out with a bright red lego in the middle of it!
  • When I was three, I shoved an entire shaker’s worth of pepper up my nose after watching Yosemite Sam sneeze when pepper was dumped in front of a fan.
  • My daughter went through a 6 month phase where she would stick anything up her nose. Popcorn kernels, pencil erasers, jellybeans, anything.
  • My sister and I wanted ours ears pierced, so we stuck pearls in our ears which promptly went all the way into the ear canal, sending us to the E.R.
  • I stuck a cherry pit in my nose when I was in kindergarten. I don’t remember much, just the scariest, most massive pair of tweezers coming at my face at the doctor’s office.
  • When I was teaching pre-school, one of my tots sneezed out a seashell which he’d had stuck inside for three days.
  • My oldest son swallowed a finishing nail. The doctor took him back for x-rays and discovered a quarter, a dime, and two pennies in his digestive track.
  • While I was babysitting, one of the kids stuck a jingle bell up her nose.
  • A live gnat flew into my toddler’s ear. It’s buzzing noise had him hysterical. Took a deep breath, filled eyedropper with water and the bug drowned.
  • My 3-year old nephew went to the doctor for a sinus infection. While there, they discovered a 2-foot long string stuck up his nose.
  • My son stuck a battleship peg up his nose. We had to go to the emergency room to get it out.
  • When I was a kid, a neighbor kid stuck a pea up his nose. No one knew until it started growing inside of his nose.
  • My little brother stuck a cherry pit up his nose when he was about two. All he could say was ‘out, out’.
  • A boy I used to babysit started screaming that he had a “kitty cat” stuck up his nose. After a trip to the ER, they pulled out a pussy-willow!

Of course, after having lived through Noah’s traumatization, I winced as I read every single comment. But none made me sick to my stomach more than the email I got from one of my followers named April. Here’s the email in its entirety.

I just thought I’d share our own story of “boy trauma”

I have 5 children and a small house. Because of this we share, we share everything. My son Jack (he’s 4) has found really creative ways to “help” his sisters share with him. If he has something that belongs to them and they would like it back, he just pops it in his mouth!

Well this backfired on him one day when he decided that his older sister should share a necklace charm with him. I was upstairs changing a diaper when I heard him screaming and gagging. I found him drooling and screaming at me that he had “SWALLOWED THE BUTTERFLY!!!”

I’m not a panicky mother but I knew this was quite a large charm (bigger than an American 50 cent piece!) so I wasn’t sure what course of action to take. By the look on his face it was presently making a fairly uncomfortable descent to his stomach and I wondered if it would, ahem, make it out the other end alright. I called my husband at work and he came home to be with the other children and Jack and I headed to the hospital.

The Dr at the ER was incredulous that I could allow this to happen (he has obviously never parented a 4 year old boy) and wanted me to describe the charm in detail and even to go and buy another of the same charm to bring to show him. I tried to explain that it was a dollar store necklace from at least a year ago and I doubted they would still have it. He got frustrated at me and sent us to the Xray department.

The technician explained that we might not be able to see anything but that he would try, well as you can see from the attachment we certainly got a good view of the charm! I don’t think the tech had laughed that hard in a long time (at least while at work).

We ended up getting sent to a Children’s hospital, where the ER doc laughed his head off at my son’s story and gave me a copy of the Xray to show at his wedding (illustrating the difference between a small town ER doc and one who deals with children on a regular basis). He sent us on our way with the assurance that “this too shall pass”, and instructions on how to do potty checks. My husband had the good fortune of being the potty checker that uncovered the butterfly and flushed before I could tell him I was going to save it to scrapbook it, alas I will always have the disc with the Xray on it! I hope the picture gives you as much enjoyment as it still does me!

God Bless

April.

[SHUDDER]

Dan Pearce, Single Dad Laughing

PS. The majority of these are “up the nose” stories since the original post was about Noah getting a pistachio stuck up his nose. I’d love to hear any and all child traumatization stories in today’s comments section.

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