As I was digging deep into Google to put together a post called “The Real Dan Pearce” (which I believe is posting next week), I found not just one, but two past blogs that I once started, wrote a few entries, and then for some reason stopped. Funny thing is, I had completely forgotten that either one of them ever existed. So, this week I thought I’d share some of those blog posts with you (some have been slightly edited).
The Post Office Blues
Have you ever noticed… every time you go into the Post Office with a small package or large letter to send, you walk in and the line is moving, there are several people working, and you figure you’ll be in and out of there in a jiffy.
Then, like clockwork, all of the workers but one put their little plaque out that says their station is closed. It’s break-time. Within moments we’re down to one lady working the line and progression all but halts.
And then, out of nowhere, some guy slams a giant box onto the counter full of odd size packages, envelopes, and tubes. Friendly as he is, he loudly proclaims to the lady that he had a good week selling junk on the internet.
The lady starts weighing and beeping each package, and then the real bomb shell… “you’re going to have to fill out forms for each these 625 packages”. The guy gets busy filling out forms while the lady keeps plugging away. Seconds turn to minutes. Minutes turn to hours. The guy finally wraps up (with a receipt as long as Gandalf’s beard) and takes off, but only after lingering long enough to wrap up his conversation with the lady.
Somehow you slowly make it to the counter. Now the line is out the door and down the block. You reach the lady, proud of your progression, planning to suck as much time as possible in order to aggravate those still behind you. You start to panic as you see postman after postman return to his station and vocalize the word “next”. By the time she weighs your package, sticks a sticker on it, and runs your credit card, the entire line is being taken care of and your moment to be the turd at the counter is gone.
Dan Pearce, Single Dad Laughing
Originally posted on another, forgotten blog.
PS. Anybody else dislike the post office line as much as I do? I actually haven’t been to a post office in years. Maybe since this post was written. It’s funny to read something from that long ago that I don’t even remember writing.