You know… I really love camping. But there is one thing that drives me crazy while I’m camping, and it seems like no matter where I’m camping, no matter when I’m camping, or no matter who I’m with, there’s always some idiot who wakes up hours before everybody else and thinks he’s doing the campground a favor by making so much noise that everyone else wakes up, too.

I was camping with some friends recently, and the whole group stayed up till all hours of the night, giggling like little kids, sharing stories, telling jokes, and being a little overly rambunctious. I bet we didn’t go to sleep until at least 3 AM, maybe later. But, we also didn’t care because we all figured we could sleep in and be none the worse for wear.

Until, that is, one of our other friends loudly stretched in his sleeping bag, loudly unzipped the tent, loudly yawned on his way out, and loudly crunched through the trees to find a place to go to the bathroom. Okay, that’s fine. Everybody has to do that sometimes. But then, when his morning business was done, he plopped himself down in a chair just outside the tent and started… whistling! I grumbled, rolled over, and looked at my phone. 6:45. “Dude, we’re trying to sleep in here! Shut up!”

“Hey guys! Let’s get a fire going for breakfast!” Come on. You’ve gotta be kidding me. The others in the tent started screaming profanities and threats at our early bird friend. He just laughed. “Guys, come on, get up! Let’s do this!”

More profanity.

More threats.

More grunting.

More groaning.

And, sure enough, ten minutes later we were all standing outside the tent, wondering why in the heck we were.

I looked at my very awake friend who had whistled his way onto my bad list. He looked at me. I took the opportunity to tell him through thought waves that I wanted to kill him and that as soon as he turned his back, I probably would.

Damn early birds. Find something to do while the rest of us sleep. Go whittle yourself a friend or something, I don’t care.

Dan Pearce, Single Dad Laughing


PS. I’d love to hear from you. Do you love camping? Are you an early bird or do you like to sleep in? Do you feel as strongly about this as I do?

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Dan Pearce is an American-born author, app developer, photographer, and artist. This blog, Single Dad Laughing, is what he's most known for, with more than 1.4 million daily subscribers as of 2017. Pearce writes mostly humorous and introspective works, as well as his musings which span from fatherhood, to dating, to life, to the people and dynamics of society. Single Dad Laughing is much more than a blog. It's an incredible community of people just being real and awesome together!