Warning: today is a Single Dad Ranting post, and I have a serious question to pose. Why don’t people just say they’re not interested in something instead of completely ignoring you?

A couple months ago, I texted a girl and asked her on a date (this is the one I mentioned turned me down flat). Before that text, we had been sending texts back and forth pretty flirtatiously, but the second I asked her out, it just stopped. Dead… air… I sent her a couple more humorous texts here and there, still nothing.

It was almost 24 hours later that she finally wrote back and said she didn’t see us ever moving beyond friendship. Ok… just say that to begin with instead of making me stew for a day! Of course, she did reply, which was nice. Sometimes people (dating, or other areas of life) just ignore things completely and indefinitely. I don’t understand why.

A couple months ago, I was working on a possible trade deal for my dream cat (a Savannah). I had a very interested breeder with whom I had discussed things over several emails. And then suddenly, out of nowhere, the conversation stopped. I didn’t hear back from her for a couple days, so I wrote back. Still no reply. A couple days later I sent another email. Nothing. I finally called her a week later, and she told me she had decided she was no longer interested. Ok… just say so, so that I don’t keep wasting my time following a dead lead!

About a month ago, I had a client that was excited to team up with me to redo her blog template. She told me she was going to place the order, I sent her the link, and then… nothing. That was weird. We had sent more than 12 emails back and forth and had a great relationship going already. Just as I did with the others, I followed up. Nothing. I never did hear from her again. I can only assume she changed her mind and was too embarrassed to say so.

I just don’t get it. Not being interested in somebody while dating, or in a professional atmosphere, or for whatever reason is just a part of life. Why is it so hard for some people to simply say “no thanks?” Silence without explanation… it’s one of my biggest pet peeves, especially when somewhat of a relationship has already been established.

I don’t know… maybe having been in business and sales for so long, I’m used to people simply not being interested. I don’t get offended when they’re not. It’s nothing personal. I know I’m not everybody’s ideal mate. I know everything I’m selling or everything I’m venturing on isn’t going to sit right with everybody that sees it. So, just say you’re not interested, damn it, and let’s all move on!

Okay. I’m done ranting. Is anybody else bugged by this or am I unique that way? And what I’m even more curious about is, does anybody prefer the disappearing act over a “no thanks?”

Dan Pearce, Single Dad Laughing


FOLLOW-UP NOTE: There was a problem with the comments section of this particular post and several of the comments from this day disappeared (around 60 of them). I apologize for the inconvenience. The problem has been fixed and shouldn’t affect future or past posts.