Powerful Responses to ‘I’m Christian, unless you’re gay.’

Hi Dan. I read your "I'm Christian unless you're gay" post yesterday when a friend of mine on facebook linked it. I'm not gay. I have lots of friends who are. I know my sister is gay, but she has yet to accept it herself. That's not why I am writing this, though. My husband is currently serving a prison sentence. He is covered in tattoos and has piercings. He has a horrible record and on paper looks like a very bad person. But he is not. He is the most wonderful, loving, caring, strongest person I know. He has so much patience and understanding. Despite being in prison, he holds no hate or grudges toward others. He is amazing. He is my favorite person in the whole world. I miss him dearly.

There is a lot of slack I get for being married to him. A lot of judgment from others. A lot of comments and whispers that are hurtful. I don't know what it is like for him in prison, but I can't imagine it's better than what I go through. Even as I write this, I feel like I must explain to you why he is in prison so that you don't automatically judge me for being married to a criminal. I am so used to it.. I feel like I have to justify it by telling you that he's not a murderer or a pedophile or whatever it may be that people automatically think. Even if he were, would it make a difference? Like you said, people are people..

Your post spoke to me in a way that was profound. Your post told me and showed me that there are people who truly believe in loving others, regardless of who they are or what they do with their lives. This made my heart soar with joy. It also made me cry, which felt good. Thank you so much for writing that post. Thank you so much for sharing these beautiful responses. You have helped so many people and helped them in ways that you cannot even fathom or begin to recognize.

You are a brave man and I admire you for it. I'm from Utah -- my husband is incarcerated in Utah. I left the state, and my husband should be home next month after 5 long years.. I love Utah. I really do, but after this imprisonment, my husband and I both agreed that we could not reside in the state of Utah until the church's hold on it was lessened. I am not trying to diminish Christianity or make any negative comments about it. I am just trying to express that I too have struggled.

I'm really afraid that my comments here will bring hateful remarks. I'm really concerned that I somehow tainted your beautiful message. I'm sorry if I did. I just wanted to thank you for what you said.

Thanks so much for writing this. I was engaged to a man years ago who, without my knowledge, was struggling with accepting his homosexuality. ( I was young, naieve, and from Idaho.) He was really trying to conform with what society--and his church--told him to do: Find a nice girl, get married, settle down, you'll get over it. Fortunately he broke the engagement, although he still couldn't tell me why (which was very traumatizing for me.) Instead, he had me get in touch with a older woman who knew him well and she explained things. I got over my heartbreak, went on with my life, and eventually married a hetero man and we've been very happy. I've often thought, however, of how different my life would have been if he had followed what his church leaders espoused and gone ahead and married me. And I thank my Heavenly Father that, instead, my fiance broke things off and followed his gay inclinations. Can you imagine the life I'd have led? With a man pretending to love me, pretending he found me attractive, pretending he wasn't gay? And how long could he have kept it up? 10 years? 20? Before he left me, committed suicide, or just sank into permanent depression? Truly, I thank the Lord he had the courage to break things off.

Because, you see, if you really want the gay people of the world to marry and live hetero lives, that means some of them are going to marry your children. Is that they kind of life you want them to live?

My beautiful nephew "came out" 6 months ago. What challenges has has faced, many the same as your friend Jacob. I remember our scriptures expounding on the fact that the "worth of souls is great in the sight of the Lord" and I wonder that we have put conditions and qualifiers on this. Would we wish this charming and talented young man never to have been born? Would we wish him dead, physically or spiritually? Would we be ashamed of him? The answer to all these questions should be a resounding, "NO!". Simply put, I loved him before and I love him more now. What courage he has! As a Christian, I tell him repeatedly how much I love him and care for him. Because it's true.

The two final statements had to be the most powerful for me. It's easy to point to the youthful and the bullied and express sympathy for them, and to point to the bullies and express hatred for them, all without thinking critically about it. And yet the final two showed that even the older and supposedly entrenched aspects of a hateful culture can be affected by a message like this. Come to think of it, the one about bullies accepting amends was sort of good, too. But personal cynicism leads to fear that it isn't genuine. Maybe it's just a blind spot in my empathy, I don't know.Anyway, it's been eye-opening for me when I didn't think my eyes could be opened any wider. Thank you.

I really really loved this and the post it was based on. I can't add anything to this or any of the other messages. I just want to say that I really appreciate the strong admonition of love, because that is really really what this world needs. There is still so much inequality and intolerance. I too often admire people from a distance, and never let them know how truly wonderful I think they are. Dan, I was blown away by your love as a parent, and thank you for having the courage to say what so many of us need to hear.

This is really excellent. A conservative Christian friend posted this on FB and being the liberal I am, I wanted to see more. I'm so glad she found truth in your message. I'm so glad you wrote it. I too believe in the ripple effect. Thank you!

To the man posting the first powerful message, perhaps he needs to go back and re-read (read?) his Bible. Sodom and Gomorrah wasn't about clearing homosexuals. It was about people who had fallen away from God in many ways, notably not helping those in need but only feeding their own greed and it was about thinking THEY knew better how it was all supposed to work. Also note, I haven't seen words attributed to Jesus himself that admonishes homosexuality. Finally, it's pretty clear that there is MUCH in the Bible which we comfortably disregard as not applicable anymore, including not killing children who are disrespectful of their parents or polygamy. Taking the multiple wives aspect and its prevalence in the Bible which we now clearly say is NOT ok, why then are so many so adamantly against homosexuality when it's mentioned only a handful of times throughout the whole 1000+ pages of the Bible? What makes THAT so much more important to these people than all the other ways we disregard what are supposed to be wrong or abominations? (E.g., ALL the ways a person becomes unclean, the eating of so many foods I'm betting the first guy thinks are fine, doing anything remotely smacking of work on a Sunday and the list goes on and on). And these supposed "Christians" like to call those of us who don't believe homosexuality is a sin hypocrites and complain that we cherry pick from the Bible. Go figure.

Oh and 1 more thing!! HATE-GOD..never in the same sentence..

lady u are ignorant!!! it says and i quote..DONT JUDGE LEST YOU BE JUDGED!! unquote...and god is supposed to be love..he loves everyone not YOUR CHOSEN FEW!!! you people make me angry!!!! what the hell is wrong with you!!! what happened to WWJD!!!!! Huh!!! I wish i had a hand full of stones to throw at you ,because thats exactly what your doing to this poor boy!! You seriously know nothing of love..go back to sunday school and learn your verses before you quote them!!!

I am pansexual: gender and sex just don't factor in to attraction for me. I am also, as of about three months ago, Christian. I see no contradiction between these two facts. I am in an explicitly queer-allied bible-study group, and my church is open and affirming, and welcomes *everybody*. I've not yet run into anyone challenging me on these matters, but it will inevitably happen, and I plan to save this and the original article to show those people.

What I'm trying to say is that there are places that remember these things. It gets better.

That was really beautiful. I hope anybody reading this and struggling takes heart in the knowledge that there are people who believe they have every right to live without fear. You have a friend in me.

I love this post and I agree with you completely. I am going to re-post on Facebook for my friends, some of whom believe same-sex relationships are wrong. My half-brother is gay - not only was he kicked out of the Army for violating the Don't Ask, Don't Tell policy in 1999, but he was disowned by his father, step-mother, half-brother and other members of his family on his father's side (thankfully, not my side of the family!). He seems happy, but I can hear anger in his voice when he talks about his story. It really makes me sad that people who loved him before he revealed his sexual orientation now seem to think he is a horrible and evil person. He is the same person he was then and I have always loved him. I wish more people would realize that everyone deserves to be loved no matter who they are.

My name is Beka and I believe in love. What if everyone joined me in loving? It's really all we need. :)

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Dan, this is the first time that I have read your blog - it was posted on FB. I was extremely moved by your writing. I am a Christian, and I believe VERY strongly in the worth and beauty of every single human being. That said, I'm not perfect, and I have had some issues around homosexualtiy. I'll share my story - short version. I'm 64 yrs old, married in 1969, and I thought it would last forever. 7 yrs later, with 2 beautiful kids, he and I separated. Divorce followed. 3 yrs later he came out. SHOCK! SInce then my kids have experienced: "fag" slurs directed to him & his partner, his abrupt move to San Francisco, finding out he was HIV, deaths of 2 of his partners from AIDS, and finding out that he has AIDS. He is still living in CA, but does not keep in touch w kids & grandkids very much. At times I have been shocked, angry, and sad, especially for what my kids have experienced. There are gay people in my family and I have gay friends. I believe that even after my own experience, I have come to a greater understanding of what unconditional love and acceptance can feel like. At least I hope I have...To Jacob and every other gay person who has read your blog - please know that you are loved by GOD and by many other people.

A friend posted this post on Facebook where I read it. Wow, I won't say our writing styles are alike (I could only wish!), but the way we think is. I have particularly been amazed by all the Christian people I know who fear gays so much. They should fear me and my road-rage a lot more than gays - they might actually encounter me on the road, whereas the gay people they know will be no threat to them!

I have posted it too and hope many people will read and share, etc. etc. Bless you for sharing your heart, which obviously many people identify with....and for those who don't? Well, maybe they'll encounter me on the road one day!!!!

I have just finished your blog and the comments and I am a bit shocked at the responses. The article is very Christian in tone, whether that was your intent or not, and Christ would definitely agree with you. The people who felt it was their job on Earth to judge and condemn cannot be very familiar with Christ or his teachings. The intense hatred I read from those who hate homosexuals, and even the positive posts from people who begrudgingly found a reason to be more accepting made me shiver. I just really had no idea that many people felt this level of disdain and disgust for others. Thank you for your blog and for trying to get people to be true Christians. I fear we have a very long way to go yet.

This person needs to re read their Bible since the quote is " judge NOT least you be judged" or in the message translation....don't pick on people, jump on their failures, criticize their faults, unless, of course, you want the same treatment mathew 7:1

Hi Dan, I just want to thank you for having such incredible courage in writing this blog article. I always thought I was a pretty openminded, loving and accepting person because I grew up with gay friends, experimented myself with the same sex and have done some pretty way out things in my life but I realised when reading your words that I have a lot of work to do to be the kind of genuinely loving human being you describe and I think it makes sense that we were put on earth to evolve into this kind of person - one that loves unconditionally. I look at the negative responses people have sent you and it scares me that there are people like this in the world but then I know in lots of ways, I too have been guilty of judging people and treating them without the love they deserve and would appreciate a lot more than my condemnation, so I totally agree with you that our worldwide goal should be to not even judge the negative people we encounter, but love them so that they can see what love really looks like and perhaps start passing that on to others instead of their hate. Thank you so much for giving me the opportunity to catch myself when I'm looking through a narrow negative viewpoint at someone, and to open up that view to seeing them as a human being just like me, who needs love just like I do. :)

To Powerful Response #2, you wrote "Being straight takes work and effort." Really? Did you not realize how that sounds, or was that a cry for help? Because if you're actually straight (or straight-leaning,) being straight shouldn't take that much effort. I think you need to look deep inside your soul and see if the real reason you hate gay people is that you are gay yourself. You have a lot of work to do. Peace and good luck.

I think the lady on page 3 is incredibly disrespectful. I am a hindu, and having been raised in a nation of christians, while I may not agree with their beliefs, still respect them.

But to the author of the letter, I would ask, what should people who are gay or in general victims of hateful words do in such a circumstance? Please answer this for me.

It's wonderful to find people that feel the same way that I do. It's hard to put into words how great it feels. A catholic priest once said in his sermon "God wants us to condemn the sin, but to LOVE the sinner" and he's right, you're right. I'm always bothered by racism, homophobes, and the fact that every time america is in a war people think that whoever we are at war with is worthy of hate or that God is not on their side. It angers me when I hear my mother-in-law say, "Muslims don't believe in God, they believe in Allah" and every time I have to remind her that Allah is only the Arabic word for God. Just like the French say Dieu. Also, the bible does say that it is not our place to tell someone they are going to hell. That you can go to hell just for telling someone that's where they're going lol. It truly isn't our place. Thank you for posting this. :)

The first time I read this response (the person on page three), I was disgusted. I got through the first two paragraphs thinking I'd never read anything so awful and hateful -- but by the time I got to the end of it, I was smiling. I was smiling because I realized that even though I disagreed with this person, even though I thought they were outright wrong, I could love them. I could love them because as misguided as I think they are, they sum themselves up in the final paragraph.

"I will stand up and continue to motivate the sinners of this world to change and do right because I actually DO love them and want to see them gain eternal life. If that means hating and hurting a few people to help them for eternity, so be it."

I don't agree with them. I don't agree with them for a lot of reasons, but that doesn't mean I can't love them for their passion, for their drive, for their bravery in standing up for what THEY believe in. I don't agree. I think they're wrong. But I love this person, despite that. I read the email over again, and all I could think of was that I love them. That I wanted to put my arm around them and tell them that I didn't agree, but that that was okay. That THEY were okay. Even though I think they're wrong.

My parents always told me "I love you, but I don't have to always love what you do." That's the message, here. Not "love all the replies except the first two". Not "except the ones who disagree".

I really cannot believe that some people are so closed-minded that they can't see the hate that they're producing. I'm not a Christian, (I don't consider myself to have any religion), but I do agree with the fact that this world needs more love. I don't see how that's even debatable. When is love EVER a bad thing? It makes the giver and receiver both happier people, so why is it such a big deal? I honestly don't understand some people's way of thinking when it comes to religion, and I think that's where I need to learn to love. It's really hard to bring myself to accept someone so closed-minded; they almost act like God himself is speaking to them. And as ridiculous as that may sound to me, who am I to say it's not possible? I want to try to become more accepting. It will definitely take some training and learning, but I, too, believe in the ripple effect.

How many lives can I change today?

For response number 1

I feel really sorry for you, believing something like that. There are plenty of gay people out there that want nothing more than to be *natural*. But they were born that way, just like you were born to be straight and only be attracted to the opposite sex. Have you ever tried really really hard to like someone the same sex as you? Bet you can't do it. Neither can they.

And by the way, loving everybody doesn't mean not standing up for what's right. I'm an example. I'm standing up for what I believe is right, but take a look at my first sentence again. I didn't say "I HATE YOU," or anything close. I said "I FEEL SORRY FOR YOU." but I still love you, even though I don't agree with what you say. God never said "Hate your enemies or people that are different than you." He wants us to love everybody. Besides, it's not our job to decide what is truly right or wrong in the end. That's up to God. If gay people really do go to hell after they die, it's still not like we *NORMAL* people are going to go to hell too, just because we didn't constantly call them a sinner and say they were some kind of creepy freak. So, they're different. It's not like that automatically makes them go around committing every sin in the book and worshiping satan. I don't mean to insult you, but you really need to have more of an open mind. Accept things that are just a little *DIFFERENT*. It's not going to kill you.

(And just so you know, I AM a Christian.)

Dan,

I agree with you whole-heartedly!! My reply is to the author of the second negative comment page. I wasn't going to say anything, but I can't stop thinking about it, and I have to correct it or go insane. She quoted the Bible as, "Judge lest ye be judged." SO WRONG!!! People will twist even the BIBLE to support their message of HATE! So sad. That's a mis-quote! Matthew Ch. 7 vs. 1 (KJV) says, "Judge not, that ye be not judged." Verse 2 goes on to explain, "For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged; and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again." I think the meaning is clear, but I'll explain. God and Jesus are telling us, through Matthew, that we are NOT to judge our fellow man, for however harshly or strictly or meanly we judge others, God will judge us with the same. Those who spew hate and prejudice will find a rude awakening on Judgment Day, when God sadly asks them,"Why?" For Matthew goes on to say, in Ch. 25, vs 40, "And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me." When we are hateful, mean, cruel and unjust to others, to ANYONE, we are doing the same to God, and Christ. True Christians, in fact EVERYONE, should think twice before being mean or sharing a message of hate. God is all about the love, whichever God you worship, whatever religion you follow. Even if you follow NO religion, COMMON SENSE is all about the love. Life is better, and things run smoother, when there is love, not hate. Though there is lots of controversy surrounding the phrase, "Hate the sin, not the sinner," I believe it applies here. No one says you have to love homosexuality, tattoos, obesity, other religions, etc., but you should ignore these outer trappings and LOVE THE PERSON. So they're different from you; big deal. Put on your big girl panties and deal with it. But a world with more love and less hate would be fantastic. Stop judging, hating, and shunning those who are different, no matter how they are different, and just love them. Agree to disagree, and let the love flow.

I read this post and I agree whole-heartedly. There is too much hate in this life and time is too short making someone else's life miserable. I am a Southern Baptist Christian and I hate (ironic I know) to hear people bashing Gays about their lifestyle. I don't agree with their lifestyle but they have the same rights and hopes and dreams as the rest of us, who are we to tell them how they should live life. Hate the sin...not the sinner. Jesus died on the cross for them too ya know? Thank you for your words Dan, much needed in this day and age.

Amazing words Dan, seriously!

I am a "christian" - by that I mean I'm baptized, I go to church on Christmas, I pray sometimes and I was married by a priest.

A VERY near and dear friend of mine, in fact one of my best friends is gay. I've known him since I was 6 and I take a lot of pride in saying - he's dated one girl in his life...that girl was ME, after dating me for close to a year and ending that relationship, he was confident in his feelings that he was in fact, gay. To illustrate the level of our friendship - I could not be happier that I had the privilege to help him on his journey to being himself. Without him I know i wouldn't be who I am today, and I can guarantee...he wouldn't be who he is either.

It turns out my friends mom tried to convince him NOT to tell me, at all, she felt it would "harm me" - granted, his mom, who is a big church goer, also tried to "fix him", tried to banish him from the family and he nearly killed himself. Save for another friend and her mom racing out to his house that night, it's possible I would no longer have him here to call a friend... Thankfully his mom has more or less come around, and at least accepts her son for who he is, regardless if she respects the "gay" aspect of his life or not - she seems welcoming to his partner, so at the very least she's showing the acceptance they both deserve! He's still the same guy after all, he just doesn't like to sleep with women.

I now have 2 children of my own, and while I do hope they are straight simply because that is what society is most accepting of, if my kids are gay, I will still look them in the eye and say i love YOU, you for who you are, the being I produced gave birth to and nourished. Will I cry, sure I'll cry, sure I'll be upset, but it won't be because of sexuality or that my child will have a same sex partner, it will be because I know all of the hateful and horrible things my child will have to endure on the path to being themselves that are entirely unnecessary, wrong, cruel and heartless.

Don't they say "God made all men equal" What "Christian's" fail to realize is acceptance is God's greatest challenge of all...

I just finished reading your I'm Christian Unless You're Gay and Powerful Responses. I am a Baptized Baptist Christian, but I do not go to church. I have found that the Baptists tend to be the most judgmental. I first started going to church with my Grandma when I was in Middle school, around that time I died my hair many different colors ranging from streaking it blonde to blue and bright red streaks. I also strongly dislike wearing skirts or dresses as they make me uncomfortable, I am constantly fearing that someone can see up my skirt or dress. At one of my Sunday School meetings I was told I needed to change my hair color, start wearing skirts or dresses and needed to listen to Christian music and could no longer listen to Celine Dion! I was absolutely mortified! NEVER in my life had I felt so judged just because of my outward appearance and the music I listened to. I have many friends who are gay, fat, previous addicts, have or have had eating disorders, or just look different. But I have always found that those who are struggling in life are the BEST FRIENDS/PEOPLE I personally have ever met. How do you know what the person you are judging is going through? The fat person you are making fun of could have a medical disorder making it hard for them to loose weight and keep it off. I personally believe that you don't choose who you love whether it be a man, a woman, or man and woman. And I also believe as Lady Gaga sings, God makes no mistakes and I was born this way! I am proud to be different and not what everybody considers "normal", if everyone was the same our world would be a boring place to live. Thank you so much for posting your AMAZING words and I too hope that for many years and generations people will start to make changes on how they view themselves and others!

Oh, Dan. Thank you so much! These responses and the original post are just incredible. I have always been and always will be an "Ally", but the post means so much more than that. You are an amazing man. Keep doing what you're doing. I'm certain that Noah will be incredible, too.

First and foremost if you are gay and have ever been mistreated or abused by individual christians or churches then I am so so sorry. You deserve to be treated with love and respect, and any time the actions of christians say different we're the ones in the wrong, not you. I do believe in taking the bible seriously, including what it has to say about homosexuality and I put that out there purely cause I want to be as upfront and honest as I can. However the basic fundamental principle of the bible is God is love- no limits, no qualifiers, no exceptions. To the young guy who commented saying he'd contemplated suicide please know that you have infinite value and worth in God's sight. I've been thinking a lot lately about the parable of the lost son (Luke 15) and to me it's the perfect illustration of how God's love operates. When the father sees his son hurting, feeling confused and alone, he doesn't yell at him, he doesn't analyse his choices or actions or tell him all the ways he has to change- he runs to him and hugs him and calls him his son. He's not ashamed to claim him as his own. All those lies the son's believed that he's a nobody or that he doesn't fit in or that he's not worthy of love and acceptance that father shoots to pieces. He claims him as 'this son of mine', let's him know this is your identity, you have a place in my family, and you have worth as my child. I don't believe that God's number one priority is that you're straight, it's that you know him. We all, myself very much included, come to God with baggage and issues and struggles- none of us are perfect and he doesn't expect us to somehow have it all together before we're allowed to be part of his family. Instead we come and are accepted just as we are and over time if there are things that need to change God will make that clear. But that's between you and God and is certainly not my or anybody else's call. This is my third year living with a gay flatmate with who has become like a brother to me. Fortunately he's always been incredibly respectful and even supportive of me being a Christian and his sexuality's never really been an issue. From the get go we've both chosen instead to judge each other based on how we treat each other. Dan you hit the nail on the head when you said it's all about love. I believe as a Christian but also just as his friend it's important for me to try to show the love of God the best I can towards him. Therefore, if he's going through a rough breakup my responsibility's not to judge that relationship but to appreciate that he's hurting and try to comfort him best I can. Similarly, if his boyfriend's round what demonstrates the love of God better- being a rude jerk in some kind of hypocritical misguided attempt to take a 'moral' stance or welcoming him into our home and making that environment somewhere where he feels loved and accepted?.

Dan, I have been consumed with your post and the follow up comments all morning. I am an active member of the LDS church but have some different opinions about this topic than my friends and other members. I believe whole heartedly in what your post said, about loving others no matter what our values, beliefs or opinions are. And I like how you related your post to all major religions. It isn't a problem in just one church; it's a universal problem. My two youngest girls are active in our church but have many friends, LDS and not, who are gay. They love them and accept them for who they are. I have taught my children about diversity in all areas of life. Sometimes they feel like a minority themselves but I believe they are showing real Christlike love as he taught and showed by example. I read some of the follow up posts and the ones that were harsh were difficult to read. I try telling myself that they have to be "fake" or a "joke" cause people can't REALLY believe these things. But I know they do. And it's very sad. I was happy to read about the lives you touched and helped through your post. I have shared your post on my Facebook. Although I know it may result in some differing opinions, I'm okay with that. Again, thank you for your efforts to helping others to learn how to truly love each other!

Powerful, powerful message - I had seen it rolling around the internet but hadn't actually read it until this evening...first of all, I am a Christian, but my faith revolves around a personal relationship with Jesus Christ - the same Jesus who spent time with whores and tax collectors and lepers, the same Jesus who washed his own disciples' feet on the very night of his crucifixion, the same Jesus whom, as you mentioned, commanded us to "love one another". If there is one thing that irks me as a Christian it's when other "Christians" take the word of God and twist it to the point that it becomes unrecognizable. Matthew 7:1-3 reads: 1 “Do not judge, or you too will be judged. 2 For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. 3 “Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?" This is in stark contrast to the second commenter who wrote "God has commanded us to judge others lest we be judged." Someone needs to read her Bible. Coincidentally, it is people like this commenter that have at times made MY life difficult as a "born again Christian" (a term I hesitate to use because of the negative connotations associated with it) because people automatically assume I am some sort of religious lunatic. Far from it. I believe in what you are saying, that we are here to love one another, whether or not we agree with what the other person believes/says/does. Christ walked among and ate with the sinners, the low of the low, and made Himself their servant. Yes, God hates sin. That is also written in the Bible. But I was not put on this earth to judge someone else's sin. I was put on the earth to show the love of Jesus and share the good news of His grace to ALL of us who are indisputably sinners. Do I struggle with negative feelings towards others from time to time? YES. Because I am human, and I too sin. However, I do my best every day to be the light of Christ to everyone I meet, because you NEVER KNOW how your smile, your simple acknowledgment of another person's existence will effect someone's life. My church reaches out to the homeless, to the addicted, to the broken. I am fortunate to be in a church community that teaches love and respect and grace and service to those in need. Do we believe that sin exists? Absolutely. But we also believe we are the foot servants of Jesus and that no sin is beyond His grace. Shame on those "Christians" who condemn the downtrodden and hold themselves higher than the masses. THEY will be judged for their ways by God on Judgment Day. I am not perfect, but I strive every day to be more Christlike, and what you are calling your readers to do is basically that, whatever they want to call it. Thank you for writing this powerful message and having the courage to stand up to a very powerful majority of very mislead people.

this message has been to long in comming and i'm so happy that someone (you) has finally had the guts to say it. as a bisexual i have come into prejudice even with in my own family. my sister refuses to talk to me about it and simply says love the sinner and hate the sin. when i told my mom, she said that she still accepts me as long as i dont act on it or tell other ppl. my mom is gonna get a copy of this post u wrote cuz she believes she's being a christian when she openly hates gays and people that are not white dutch people. she wont even talk to my fiance and when i'm around all she says is n*gg*r this and sand n*gg*r that. it frustrates me to no end, and i've asked her to stop multiple times but she refuses, she says she's a christian but tries to quote and misinterpret bible passages to fit her view. i'm gonna give her a copy of ur post. hopefully she'll change her views if and after she reads it

I read your article after a friend had shared it on Facebook. Another friend had posted it a few hours later. It was an amazing thing to read. I've never had a problem with any gay people. I was raised in church and I honestly and wholeheartedly believe that if someone is gay, it isn't a choice. It's something that is always there. Whether it's hidden for awhile because they don't want someone to know or they just don't know it themselves. There's no reason anyone should be ridiculed for being who they are. No one should have to adapt themselves or hide parts of their life in order to keep their friends and family from shunning them. I've always believed the verse "Let he who is without sin cast the first stone." Because there are no perfect people in this world. And Christians try and say that sins are forgivable, but then they turn away someone who is different for one reason or another. To me, that isn't very Christian like. I hope that someday in this world people can be themselves without having to hide. It probably won't happen until long after my sons and probably their children are gone. It may not happen at all, but I refuse to change my views on things because "that's what God would want." "Love thy neighbor as thyself" "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you" Those are things Christians teach their children, but they refuse to do the same. They make me ashamed to be grouped in with them.

You're an inspired man. Well said. You did the right thing in the right way at the right time by writing that. I'm glad that you applied the thought as you did for all of the good that it's done. One of my church leaders said it this way (approximately): "Let us be more patient with those who sin differently than we do."

I think you're right. My own stance has always been that there are people who are assholes and there are people who are not, and it doesn't matter what people say, it's what they do that count; so I'll sit down with muslims and hindus and christians and atheists all equally because so long as they're decent people then that's all that matters.

The second comment made me sad because someone with an education has thought it through and done their heavy thinking and they've come round to being the exact opposite of what even an elementary reading of the New Testament shows. Isn't it "judge _not_ lest ye be judged" anyway?

If you're LGBT or whatever and reading this, then do remember that there are straight white guys who don't hate you too. I know it sounds stupid but there are a lot of people with good hearts who it would never cross their minds to be bad to you. You just don't see them because they don't go shooting their mouths off like the haters. And maybe that should change. Hell, that definitely should change. It's not the sort of thing that should ever go unchallenged.

People like you give me so much hope. May God bless you, always.

please take me off your email ! get at least 5 listings a day and am not at all interested in topic it's ridiculous

Me: A Canadian Christian with many queer friends [some also Christian].

I get the sense that because I live in Canada, in an area mainly comprised of University Students, that the people I spend most of my time with are generally open-minded. I'm not aware of any specific oppression to any people, though I'm sure much goes unnoticed.

It was the first two "powerful responses" that really got me ticked. The first just sounded ignorant, but the second missed the point. All that I can say in response are these:

1. "Hate the sin, not the sinner." Which may or may not be explicitly written in the bible.

2. "What you do to the least of these, you do unto me" ["least" from the perspective of the listener, not the speaker] - Jesus

3. The verse is not "judge others lest ye be judged" but rather "judge NOT, lest ye be judged".

I'm sure quotes could be thrown back and forth all day, [and I don't plan on checking back for responses,] but I whole-heartedly agree that the bottom line for what we should do and how we should act is LOVE.

One last verse of an argument: [1 Cor 13 : 1 - 4] and then add this: "If I know and understand all of the laws of true purity and proclaim them to the world, but cannot do it with love, I am nothing."

P.S. I think your post was the least offensive way of delivering what you needed to say, and I'm very impressed!

ThereIsHope Thanks for the kind words. I do have a bunch of brain dumps in my FB Notes but nowhere else. I've been encouraged to share some either in a blog or book but that just doesn't fit my life right now.The bittersweet part of 'truth' is that it is open to so many points of view. Like the old parable about 12 blind men assigned parts of an elephant and asked to describe an elephant. They are all correct and they are all incomplete. Because each experience is unique, the grandiosity of divine truth is difficult to grasp in any universal description. It is a chasm which followers of Christ must ever endure to cross. Maybe someday I'll be able to contribute but for now I share His light with those in front of me which, at the end of the day, is all He ever asked for.

All I can say is thank you! I pray God raises up many more straight people to take a similar stand. You have inspired me and reminded me of the power of one.

There is nothing I could say that would hold up to what amazing things have already been said.

After reading the fifth powerful response though, I simply wanted to post a few links that might be useful to someone out there.I am not posting these because of my religion (which i'm still sorting out for myself thank you) or because I'm LGBTQ (I'll figure that out when I start caring about having a significant other) I am posting them because they are proof that the LGBTQ community are people just like us, that can believe in Christianity (or any other religion, for that matter) just like us and that they should have a safe place in this world too.

The first link is to a something posted by a tumblr I follow: http://twinfools.tumblr.com/post/14053022839/hey-l...

and the second is to a tumblr mentioned in that post (it is just one place that shows Christianity and LGBTQ thriving in the same people) http://gaychristian.tumblr.com/Best of luck to those out there struggling with these issues, no matter what side you are on. If you are someone glad to have come across this article then spread the love and the word and if you are disgusted by this article then I feel a bit bad for you but hope that you find a civil way to express your feelings because no matter how much you disagree, that NEVER gives you a reason to say cruel things.

I wanted to post a comment about how amazing and uplifting both these comments and the original article were, but I lack the ability to put this in a way that lives up to the articles themselves. So instead, just a short message from a comfortably straight christian to the lady in the second response. If you are straight, then being straight takes about as much work and effort as keeping the natural colour of your eyes. I absolutely do not regret to inform you that I may have some potentially upsetting news.

To follow:

At the end of day do we not all want to be happy, and a very simple fact is the people that I see hating and blaming others for there own inherent unhappiness are not happy people! So why on earth do we make the world so complicated! We all want respect, love and acceptance. The only way we will achieve these things is by practising these qualities to everyone. Do others not feel that the world in enriched by these wonderfully interesting people who perhaps are 'different'. In all honesty this world would be incredibly boring if everyone thought the same, and generally we all want the same basic human 'needs' of love etc so why are we making it so hard on ourselves by bringing the concept of 'if you don't think this way you'll go to hell'. Well to be honest if that's generally what you believe then fair enough but why does that give anyone the right to go up to a person and say you're wrong or bully them. Why on earth not just ignore them and get on with your own life without making other lives difficult! The only answer would seem to be that for whatever reason that person is not comfortable in there own beliefs so they feel the need to go round trying to make others feel the same so there's more people prescribing to a particular set of beliefs. And the argument that 'it's our job to judge these people and make it obvious that it's not ok', or 'I want to save this person from hell'. Well for a start it is not your job to judge them, is it not Gods. If you believe in God. And if you don't believe in God and you simply don't like someone being a drug abuser then feel compassion, surely, not hatred and the old phrase 'they should just get jobs and it's all there own fault'. Well yes it is there responsibility to take care of there life and they've made mistakes but what good does it do us to feel misplaced anger towards them. Surely it would be better to hope the best for them. Sorry I have completely rambled. Hopefully i haven't offended too much. And I'm sorry for the length! But it sparked of a passion in me. To all those who do feel victimized for something, if you are a good person and try your best in life, then in my opinion you are a wonderful, worthwhile human being. If you hate the original post (which was awesome:-) or this one, fair enough, but I really hope you don't spread hate because that won't make anyone happy least of all you.

In all honesty this post touched me and surprised me. I live in the UK and three out of four of my best friends are bisexual. They each have complicated gender or sexual identities. They have each suffered bullying and ignorance (not necessarily to do with these specific issues but also because they like certain types of music or dress a certain way etc) but this has made them in to deep, sensitive and giving people. Obviously I'm not saying just because you've experienced bullying from others or just because your bisexual, gay or trans this makes you suddenly a wonderful person. But there is certainly a 'trend'. An ability to appreciate and give more 'love' simply because others have at times denied them this.

This post surprised me simply because of how simple it was. I have never been bothered by sexuality, gender identity, how tattooed someone is or if someone is fat. It seems irrelevant and pointless. Obviously just like others I have made a careless comment that could to others be ignorant or rude. I have grown up with no religious background however I am very spiritual (not necessarily prescribing to any particular religion) but I simply believe as the original post advertises and the comments, in a code of love and simple respect. So I think of this code as a moral one based upon how I would like to be treated by others.

Simple codes like give all humanity respect, unless an individual causes blatant harm or negativity to those around them. However, I would not then follow this up with let's all then hate that person. I suppose some people are beautiful examples of humanity and others aren't. But I truly believe we are not all so simple, everyone has kindness and cruelty in them. In the end it is choice. Should we choose to follow a simple, rational code of treat others how you would want to be treated.

I would say to those who do go round advertising hate. That it seems to me, that those capable of receiving love in the greatest capacities and who do treat others with basic respect, (to people who would bring up the would you respect a murderer argument. I have heard this. To put simple a man who wishes to have sex with another man does not take another persons basic human right to live away) will simply understand love better than those that don't and be more loved and more able to love than others.