In mid-November I published a piece that I had been working on for more than a year called I’m Christian, unless you’re gay. Since then, I have received quite a few emails from people suggesting I record a live reading of it, most of whom thought it would be a good vessel for sending the message to people who “don’t like reading.” Of course I had mixed thoughts on this for two reasons. One, I really don’t want reading to become a lost skill. And two, I don’t want this post to become a dead horse that I continually beat on.
But then two things changed my mind.
First, a friend of mine read me a couple paragraphs from the post that had meant the most to her. And while it sounded fine, the way she read it sounded completely different than the way it sounded to me when I wrote it and would later read it. And that made me realize that with more than four million people having read it now, it may have come across four million different ways, and for all I know, nobody ever will know what it sounds like to me when I wrote it.
Second, I thought about my son. And then I thought about the fact that I could get hit by a bus tomorrow or a meteor next week. And if I disappear, it would be nice if he had more than just words on a computer screen to remember his dad’s legacy by.
So, I made a few minor tweaks to make it sound better out-loud, and I sat down and made a recording of it. I hope it demonstrates what I feel whenever I read it and what I really meant when I wrote it. I hope it gives you a better understanding of the message. I hope it touches you in fresh ways. And with that… I’m Christian, unless you’re gay – A Live Reading by Dan Pearce.
And please, share this page or the video with those you know. Here’s a link to the video itself:
After recording it, I let a few Facebook friends view it in order to give me feedback, and I received the following message from one of them…
…from a practical viewpoint: My husband is dyslexic. Because of this, your longer blog posts don’t always get finished when he attempts to read them, because it is just too hard for him. He got up while I was watching this and he got so excited, it was cute. Then he asked me to ask you to make a video of “Congratulations, you broke your child” (he has tried, multiple times, he just can’t make it through that post). So, assuming you get a positive response from this video perhaps you would consider doing videos of maybe your top ten posts? I am sure that those that follow you that have learning disabilities would appreciate/benefit from this. I understand that you are extremely busy, but food for thought. You would be doing a service.
It was something I hadn’t thought of before. Some people have a hard time reading not because they’re lazy or because they’re part of “that generation” but because the words are literally difficult to put together due to reading challenges or disorders. For that reason, I see real value in recording some of the most popular posts as live readings.
So, over the next little while I plan to record at least the top four or five posts that I’ve published in the past. Maybe a few more depending on how those goes. In the future, I’ll do the recordings very quickly if I ever have another post go viral.
So what do you think after watching the live reading? Is it the same as the way you read it or did it come through differently? Did you understand the meaning of anything I wrote differently?
Dan Pearce, Single Dad Laughing
PS. I know many people who find this page will be new to this blog. This original post brought about several beautiful follow-up posts with responses from people who had read it. I’d encourage you to check them all out via the links below…
Original Post: I’m Christian, unless you’re gay.
Follow-up Post: Powerful responses to “I’m Christian, unless you’re gay”
Follow-up Post: A few more powerful responses to “I’m Christian, unless you’re gay”
Follow-up Post: Responses video to “I’m Christian, unless you’re gay”
Follow-up Post: The most amazing response yet to “I’m Christian, unless you’re gay”
Follow-up Post: Men in uniform respond to “I’m Christian, unless you’re gay”
Follow-up Post: My daughter, home at last! A response to “I’m Christian, unless you’re gay”
I have to say thank you for writing and posting this video and all of this. I grew up in the church and my grandpa is a pastor. I had the same msg pushed in my face for a long abt ppl who weren't like us and they needed to be saved. As I grew up my outlook on the world changed when I started having feelings for both sexes. I never told anyone in my family. Only a few close friends actually knew. In high school, one of my gay male friends was beat down in front of almost the entire high school. No one ran to rescue. I couldn't let it happen so I jumped in and pulled the guys off. Unfortunately, I got hit in the process. After that I didn't care who knew that I was bi. I came out to my family and my parents didn't have a problem with it however my grandparents did. It didn't help the situation that a few wks after this happened I found out I was pregnant. I was 16 and a senior in high school. My world became hell. I ended up having to be home schooled til after I had my oldest daughter bc other kids were pushing me down the stairs. I was constantly called a slut. Alot if ppl at my church were extremely hateful and some of them actually made a seen at church said I no longer belonged bc I was no longer a Christian for I had done. I ended up leaving the church and moving to a different city with my new family. I started to explore religion and found that Wicca honestly suited me best. I was a piece with myself. After being married for 8 yrs, my husband told me he wanted a divorce and left me and our 3 kids for another woman. He said that I was no longer what he needed. He became hateful and started calling me a devil worshiper. If you know anything abt Wicca then you know that's not true. Thru my anger, hate and pain I found my true husband. He changed the way I felt and opened up my heart. He didn't care that I was a divorced single mom who was bi, Wiccan, had tattoo and had 3 kids that weren't his. Honestly he saved me from myself. Now we have a happy family of 6. I still get judged and called names all the time for the way my life has gone. If my life hadn't gone the way it did then I wouldn't be the person I am today. I love who I am. I always try to have an open mind, heart and hand. I truly believe that what you put out there towards others you will get back threefold. Anyway, I'm rambling. I truly love your blog and this especially made me cry but with happy tears. I've shared it with all my friends and family. Please don't ever stop doing what you're doing. Make ppl laugh and love that adorable Noah. Yet again... Thank you Dan!
I googled "Love your neighbor as yourself" and found your blog. I wasn't as impressed with the No thanks article, per se, but I read it, and understood it... and then I found the link to "I'm Christian, unless you're gay". I can already see the hashtag now #icuyg.. but I digress. Based on what I have read so far- please, by all means, WRITE THE BOOK! With permissions, include responses here in your blog. Talk about a book that should be read by anyone and everyone!
It has to be one of the very best articles I've read or watched. I'm straight. I have a gay friend (One who has recently come out to me). But I was not doing my search because of the gay issue- I was searching because I am working on my own personal ministry and Deut 6:4-5; Lev 19:18; Mark 12:28-31. I have had it up to HERE with what passes for church. I love this article/video on behalf of ALL THE MISFITS.
I count myself as one of the walking wounded. And sure I have been guilty of wounding others myself, and I'm sorry for it. A very important song comes to mind at this moment- actually 2 very important songs- both from Jars of Clay- Scarlet, from The Eleventh Hour, and Weapons from The Long Fall Back to Earth.
From Weapons (with the intro lead in): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ojZQwCJk2hY&feature=related
"Lay your weapons down, there are no enemies in front of you."
and Scarlet: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kl6s5yCPG9c
"...let down your hair, let our kiss make fools of them all..."
Both of these include the lyrics so you can clearly follow them.
One more: Worlds Apart, Jars of Clay: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NFj17GYJEj0
I will have more to say about this at my new blog... but for now, bravo.
http://ministry.markrwatson.org
In all honesty, it was similar to the way I had read it in my head, but it seems much more potent and meaningful when heard out loud. It seems to touch deeper that way, and you can't skip paragraphs or simply scroll down. Thank you for sharing this. I have always prided myself in not being judgemental, in being open and accepting. But some of the things you said in both blog and video made me cringe and go "yeah, I do that" within certain situations. Since reading your actual blog I have caught myself mid-judge multiple times (working in customer service). I now inwardly cringe, take a deep breath and just smile instead and do the best I can do. Thank you :)
Thanks to you I have learnt something horrible about myself. All my life my biggest fear was not being accepted by other people, not only for being gay but also for who I was as a person. Never did it cross my mind that I too needed to accept other people different from ME. I was so focused on doing the right thing to please the people around me for their acceptance that I forgot to accept people who needed MY acceptance. Thank you for a great reading - and eye opener!
Thenk you for sharing this message. We should all love each other and forgive anything we consider sins in others as we expect them to forgive what they consider sins in our lives. Loving ouselves and others is the way to true happiness.
I'm all in. Thank you! Living with an open heart takes constant work and a lifetime to master. But at least if you can be mindful of your judgements (and we all have them) stop yourself for a moment and realize that until you can be compassionate and kind to yourself you can never fully be open and compassionate towards others. Open mind=open heart. Celebrate the vast, infinite differences between us while remembering that we are all worthy of love. Learn empathy. Practice empathy. Put away fear. Discover infinite joy and share it. Namaste. Peace.
@DesmondChild check out MAR KZ-Obie O'Brien of Bon Jovi produced the record http://t.co/8jb2x9KU
@Stubbornly_gay and this is hi sYou-Tube video of the reading... http://t.co/EwRA1r4A
Wonderful article. I have dyslexia and I also have a masters degree. After working so hard in school I decided that I was going to filter information by how accessible the audio version was. (There is so much out there, that one has to be able to filter info some how, right?). By doing this, I've become aware that audio is an a certain kind of art form in its self. I have never subscribed to a blog because I can't commit to reading them. But I signed up for yours. Thanks!
lol. People are selectively using the words of the writers of the bible to their own ends. If it was all taken as law then all women would be in real trouble: Deuteronomy 22:5: "The woman shall not wear that which pertaineth unto a man, neither shall a man put on a woman's garment: for all that do so are abomination unto the LORD thy God."
You are wonderful and should be VERY proud of yourself!! That is one of the smartest things I've heard in a long time and I have always thought about what you spoke of including the "Golden Rule" and why people cant just treat people how they want to be treated. THANK YOU!!
Im just getting around to finding/watching the video version and thought you might appreciate this:
http://iamkarijerene.tumblr.com/post/19163431618/cheappoet-jesus-did-i-stutter-yes-thank
I think doing a video reading is a great idea. It's actually funny, I think we have some weird mental link or something, because we seem to be thinking and doing some similar stuff lately. I have been thinking about it for over a year, and recently I bought a webcam so I can start vlogging. I'm not sure if I'll but transcripts on my blog, but I really wanted people to hear things the way I have to say them. I can also speak better than I can type due to carpel tunnel, so I think it will be easier. I also think I can reach a new section of audience. I might actually get really wacky and see if I can get my voice-to-text program to listen to the videos and make transcripts without me ever typing.
BTW, you may not want to beat a dead horse, but that post was amazing, the reading is great, and I hope you reach lots of people with the great message.
i loved it when i read it, and hearing your reading made it even more powerful! i posted it on my wall. thanks for the great message! :)
wow~This is such a powerful message.
The link tells me it's been removed from YouTube by the user. I hoped to share it!
Whew! I finally got to view it. I did a separate search on You Tube for it and managed to find it, although it's at a different web address than what was provided in this blog. Very glad I got to hear this. Dan, you are one heck of an amazing person. :-)
Thanks Dan......You are an awesome guy.
how'd you get to be so awesome? :) it takes courage to walk the path of integrity!
I love your message on love and find myself guilty...
Thank you, Dan. It was a powerful piece of writing and it transferred into an even more powerful live reading. Thank you for doing it.
I love this! Very powerful. I am christian and falter often, but I hope each day I can be an example of love. I am so glad you did this. It isn't about religion, it's about compassion and humanity. When I look for friends and a church, I look for people who love unconditionally. It is hard, sometimes, not to judge people, and you really opened my eyes that I need to work harder at not judging a book by its cover. I am very fortunate that every church I have attended never preached these ideas of excluding people. In fact, my current church reaches out to everyone. I know I am lucky and have had "christian" friends who attended other christian churches who have these ideas of exclusion. I was never comfortable with them because exclusion has never felt right to me and I am glad I have stuck with my church who invites and embraces everyone. It is true that some of my most loving friends are not christians and I have some wonderfully christ like friends who are gay. My life would not be complete without all my friends, regardless of their beliefs. True, life is simpler when you hang out with people who think the same, but it is incredibly boring.
This is a very powerful message & I'm glad you found the strength to share it. Thankyou Dan!
Powerful words! Thank you!
I'm glad I heard you read it out loud - the first time I read this in November, I got a different feeling about the paragraph towards the end when you challenge the listener to be friendly with someone they aren't comfortable with. The first read had me think that it was some kind of charity to do so - that the person was still better than the other - listening to it was different and really challenged me to stop and think of someone I am uncomfortable with. Thank you.
I've read the post "I'm Christian, unless you're gay" probably half a dozen times and every time get something new from it. Now listening to you read it, I heard something that I didn't "hear" while reading it. I ABSOLUTELY love the line "Why is that some times, the most Christ-like people are they who have no religion at all?" It's sad how true that really is. I grew up in a Baptist church and we were taught being a Christian means being Christ-like. Yet we were taught to not associate with anyone who was not Baptist. We were taught gays and lesbians went to Hell and God turned His back on them. We were actually being taught to be un-Christ-like in SO many ways. I'm VERY glad that my parents did not go along with some of these teachings and they ALWAYS taught my brother and I to see people for WHO they are and not WHAT they are. Oh, I'd like to add, my brother is gay. Growing up being taught what we were, having it drilled into our heads that it was wrong, it didn't matter. He KNEW this is who he was and not something he chose. He's said to me more than once over the years "Why would anybody CHOOSE this? It can be a very hard life at times. There are SO many things that people look down upon gays for. I don't see how anybody would want to CHOOSE having to live a life more difficult than it has to be." Growing up in the church we did, we were taught "hate the sin, love the sinner". We were taught that, but it wasn't practiced by those doing the teaching. Jesus loved us sinner so much that He died on the cross for each and every one of us. Yet there are so many Christians who "hate the sinner". How is it Christ-like to hate people, judge them, or look down upon them because of their sins when Christ loved us that much that He gave his life for us? "For all have sinned, and come short of the Glory of God." Romans 3:23 .... "all have sinned". We left the Baptist church as soon as I graduated from the church school. I will never define myself by a religion again. I am a Christian and I feel being this religion or that religion more often than not, gets in the way of being the best Chrisitan that you can be.
your words are powerful, keep telling us what u think, its what alot of us think just dont put it on here. Thank you for saying things that need to be said. In this day & age their should be no one ashamed of who they are or who they choose to love. Love knows no boundaries. Dont judge me by my sexual orientation but for who I am inside and how i treat others, get to know someone before you judge them. I wish hate did not exist...
Good for you! It's about time someone spoke out. Just know that there are lots of us who stand behind you all the way. And have the same beliefe system. I for one would stand up and hug your friend, the homeless, the mentally handycaped. We are all Love and to be and give love, GOOD LUCK to you in your journey, Thoughts ansd prayers for all those that are hurting needlessly,
Your reading was beautiful. Thank you. This statement of yours is being borrowed and quoted: "What makes somebody love, accept & befriend their fellow man is letting go of a need to be better than others. Nothing else."
I clicked on the link for the live reading, but YouTube said it was removed. Where else can we view this?
Hoping you put this on YouTube if you haven't already!
Great job, and hopefully the message will travel farther as a video because it need to be heard!!
Great job, Dan! I think the live reading is a great idea. Personally, I read it the way you did, but I can see how others might get a very different perspective on the video vs the text. Would love to see more of these... maybe your piece on perfection?
Single dad laughing, you should meet momastery - a fellow blogger who has addressed the same topic in an equally profound way. I think you guys would be friends... Or at least commiserate in the hate mail ;) here's her post http://momastery.com/blog/2012/01/22/a-mountain-im-willing-to-die-on-2/
Thank YOU, Dan, for putting this out there. Jacob was right, it's in you to share! I love you!
loved it Dan...will also be sharing it. Thank you!
I once had a teacher, a very good one, tell my class that one person cannot change the world. I knew she was wrong about that, and you have proven it. Thank you for recording and posting.
Great job!
Love it. And someday, maybe someday, I'll be able to live up to this video/essay and be able to love the co-worker who told me God created atheists (of which I'm one) for the same purpose He created Hitler. Maybe someday I'll be able to love the fellow teacher who, three days after I miscarried, told me I was playing around with the will of God by undergoing fertility treatments. And maybe I'll even be able to tolerate the school employee who offers prayer to save the gay kids. Right now I fall short; there are still some things I can't "love" over. But I'll keep trying. Thank you.
So glad you read it out loud! I read it for 3 straight classes! Whew!
Just have it a listen, it was amazing! I will be awaiting more!!!!
Listening now and planning on sharing. Very well written and spoken Dan. :)
The live reading is worth it.. I'm listening right now, and it's so much more powerful through your voice. You made a wise choice. ;) You did a good thing by posting this. Don't forget that, Dan. You're friend and many others thank you for your bravery. BTW, the Westboro Baptist Church SUCKS and I'm embarrassed to say I live in the same town as these pathetic people. I'm so sorry people from across the country have to put up with their crap too; it's bad enough to see it everyday here, but it makes me sick to know people outside of Kansas know who these people are as well. Keep fighting the good fight!
recordings are good for sons and others my mum is stil lher however tehj mum that sings an dplays i pretty much gone
sharing!
shared...<3 thank you , dan
I'm like the person who responded about their husband. I have problems reading long pieces, and since I'm a student still, all my attention and energy is gone by the time it comes for something reading only for myself. This is a wonderful idea. Thanks for posting this.
It's a great point of view! I am not religious, but I have to agree with most of what u posted about-the live reading makes it that much more powerful. Keep up the work and dismiss the hate mail u'll be getting later. It's YOUR point of view.
Dan, I didn't think that your original "I'm Christian, unless you're gay" post could get any more powerful until I actually watched you say the words yourself. Your incredible passion is so prevalent in everything that you write and being able to really see that speaks volumes about the kind of man you are. You are changing minds and making people stop and think about their own daily actions and thoughts, accusations, hatred. I have saved this post to my desktop so that any time I find myself judging somebody because they are different than I am, I will see that sitting there right in front of me and I can watch to have that reminder. I hope to one day soon be able to really live your message without needing that reminder.
I read this when you posted it and i could so relate, I'm a lesbian, learning disabled, and a wiccan. You just learn how to not have a place.