FOR BORROW: One Disgusting Dog

I have a French Bulldog, who had the OCD of paw licking. I asked the vet about it and after checking her over, found out between her toes and on belly she had red yeast infection. Turns out she is allergic to wheat, put her on a no wheat dog food the licking subsided and the smelly farts were mostly gone. So Buddha may have an allergy you should check on.

If he'll do anything for a hot dog, why not use one to 'treat' him while he's in the bath? *Mom logic at work here*

My dog is a tiny, calm, quiet, beautiful chihuahua named Shanti. She is wonderful in every way except two: her breath smells like butt, and when she pees (which is weird, because she only goes 2 or 3 times a day) it's like a gallon of it. The only place I can imagine she stores up all that pee in in her giant bat ears, lol. Otherwise, she's amazing : )

After my husband and I get into bed at night, my Boston Terrier will take a good 15 minutes to lick his entire...er...'nether region' completely clean. Did I mention he sleeps between us? The sound effects can get pretty annoying when you just want to go to sleep.

thanks for the laugh! you want gross in the way of dogs, get yourself a long haired st. bernard! had them growing up. basically, think of your dear disgusting (yet adorable) buddah, but weighing well over 100 lbs. and with over-active drool glands! lmao....good luck with the bath thing!

i am alwasy chasing my three weenie dogs around, trying them to stop from drinking out fo the toilet, eating things they shouldnt and dining on faeces!! love them to death though !

Sounds like my old neighbor's dog, Churchill....

My English bull dog (Tinkerbell) just passed in December. You might want to take Buddha to the vet. It actually sounds (shedding hair, dry heaving, farting) like he may have IBD. Which can be SERIOUS in English bull dogs. I'd take Buddha in a heart beat... I miss my Tinkerbell.

OH and yes English bull dogs... they are a farting, burping, stinky, loud, slobbering, bull headed bundle of love.

We have two English bulldogs. Duchess Tullia Matilda (aka Tilly) and her son Humphrey Bogart (aka Humpy). When Humpy was about 12 weeks old he died after choking on dog food. He didn't chew, but inhaled his food which became lodged in his throat. I found him and immediately administered what can only be described as a doggy CPR and revived him. For some reason he's of the opinion we are bonded. Through all this, Humpy has never slowed on his eating habits so we keep a watchful eye on him. He is now 76lbs so we are also working on dieting. This bullies not only lick their own paws excessively, but each others ears nonstop. It's disgusting when you go in for a good scratch on the ears only to pull back a hand that is covered it what can be described as gook. In addition, both dogs can clear the living room of all living beings who can only find refuge upstairs or outside. Humpy himself will leave you with eyes and nose burning and hair loss. But through all these ummmm shall we say "issues" these pups are our pride and joy. Faces only a mother can love....and daddy too.

This is gross but funny too...right now I have a cat not a dog (miss owning a dog). My cat however does kitty yoga and we say she is a porn cat. she will grab her back leg with both her front paws left it way in the air above her head and bend her head down between her legs and start licking. LOL

I have been reading your blog for ages and never felt inclined to comment before but i can't help myself this time. I am awake at 5am (i am in New Zealand) because i have a Cocker Spaniel named Nixon whose smelly farts are so bad they just woke me up.

The last time he smelled this bad his anal glands were blocked. Apparently dogs communicate through those glands - which is why they are always smelling each other's butts - and they can get blocked. I was unaware of this until last year when Nixon's smell became unbearable and i took him to the vet.

If his worse than normal farts continue - poor Bhudda might need a visit to the doggy doctor. A short course of anti biotics will have him smelling his only averagely bad self again in no time!

dan, you're too funny for words!!!

TO everyone in the comments with dogs with gas, and poop eating, and other various tics that dogs seem to get?

Check out this website http://www.petwellbeing.com - They sell some of the best remedies for the skin, and the farts! (which is usually a food issue) We all love our pups, lets give them the best right? :) Tell them Lauren sent you!!!

I have a 5 month old EBD and your post has me LMAO. My 'Precious Puddin Pie' has developed a disgusting palate for POOP. Be it out of my daughter's potty, the chicken coup, a filthy stinking load out of my sons rotten diaper....to her it's a fine wine, a delightful delicacy that she has no problem schmeering all over her bottom lip and chin for the whole world to see, smell and share. "How can you turn your nose up in discust?" she asks as she leans in for a kiss. Anyone brave enough can borrow my beast for a few hours. You don't have to return her clean, my only request is that you BRUSH HER TEETH!!

My puppy is only 9 weeks old. Not supposed to bath him often but he stunk so bad today that i couldn't stand the smell of him, came out of nowhere. I am not going to like doing it when he is 80-100 pounds lol. He is anal & when you piss him off he lets you know it, either by crapping on the floor or biting your ankles. He doesn't have gross habits yet.

My older brother & his wife have a 115 lbs. Mastiff-Pit Bull Mix names Lulu. My sister in-law adopted her as a puppy when my brother was serving in Iraq. She carried Lulu EVERYWHERE until she couldn't lift her anymore and, as a result, she thinks she's a lap dog. She's 115 lbs. & will try & sit on your lap given the opportunity. If you're sitting on the steps or sitting on the floor be ready to be sat on my Lulu.She's also been known to chew things or pee in the house if she's mad about something. She has a history with chewing pillows of whoever she's mad at. If she's mad at my sister in-law she'll chew HER pillow & not touch my brother's pillow & visa versa if she's mad at my brother. She'll bark up a storm when you knock on the door or ring the doorbell but as soon as say "Hi Lulu" she's putty in your hands. She once swallowed a red balloon (it was whole & a total accident). My brother thought she was having an issue when he saw something red coming out of her butt until he realized she swallowed a balloon. Once he knew she was ok he just laughed. My 2 young nieces (3 years old & 19 months old) have learned to put their arm up to block being hit by Lulu's tail when she's near by. It's really cute because it's so automatic & they know Lulu doesn't mean to hurt them if they get hit by her tail. They knew her tail wagging just means she's happy. My 3 year old once asked that Lulu be put in time out for hitting when she got hit by her tail. She said "Lulu hit me with her tail. Hitting isn't nice. She should go to time out." Too funny! My younger brother adopted a hunting dog that's about 2 years old. He's still got a lot of puppy left in him. He destroys all of his toys (especially squeaker toys) in record time. He has also expressed his anal glands (many, many times) in my brother's truck. My brother has to air his truck out every time & do whatever else he can think of to make the stench go away. It's so gross! I have a cat that can clear the apartment when he uses the litter box. Thank God he's a little obsessive about covering up his funk & also the reason I buy good odor eliminating litter. He follows me around the apartment & has to be RIGHT where I am. When we moved he climbed into EVERY box that was being packed. I think he thought I wasn't going to bring him with to the new place. He's also an attention hog. If I don't pick him up when he wants to be picked up he'll jump from the ground to my sit on my shoulder. This is cute unless he's in need of nail trim. He also drinks out of the clean toilet if you leave the lid up.

Awwwww, so cute! My last dog was a slobberer (is that a word?). But he was sweet. He only farted when he'd eat a frog (yeah, you don't want to know). But you KNEW when he'd been rooting in the creek. I miss him. So sure, send your beast my way when you need a break, I'll spoil him, love him, treat him like mine was treated: king of the castle!

Peace <3

Jay

OMG, you had me laughing so hard! You've made me love my poor little lab with dry skin even more! She's just itchy! So I have to bathe her with special oatmeal soap & add oil to her dog chow to help her not be so dry... Just wash the poor pup already!

My beloved dog - ter , Ms. Sassy Brat Orris , was nearly perfect . She didn't do any of the disgusting things mentioned below , But she DID do a FEW things to disgust you , make you laugh , and / or love her .

1. She chewed the legs on my late wife's antique pedistal table . I cured that in one fell swoop . I got some juice from a jar of very hot ......... hot peppers . I took a paint brush , and " painted " her favorite chew spots with the hot pepper juice . We sat back and waited . Sassy brat chewed . In about a minute , that problem was CURED . She took to emptying out waste baskets . More Hot pepper juice . That was cured too ! A few months later I was able to retire the hot pepper juice down the drain of the kitchen sink . She had been cured for life , of chewing things that she wasn't supposed to .

( Note , the pizza place would neither sell me , nor give me the juice , 'till I convinced them I was not going to use it for some nefarious use !!! LOL )

2. We had these " chochkees " . They were 2 stuffed animals that were supposed to look like geese . My FEMALE Shi Tzu would mount them !!! We had to put the geese away , 'cause it was just tooooooooo much . ( That cured THAT problem ) .

3. She had " eye buggers " . She had them for all her 18 years . Veterinarians could offer no help . We just cleaned them , and shaved her face with the clippers set to zero . There was no CURE for her problem . We just lived with it .

4. After hundreds of years of chasing parked cars , Shi Tzus are cursed / blessed ( genetically ) with this adorable little " smooshed in " face . This causes no end of sinus problems . Every now and again , she would start this " snorting " that would inevitable shock people . The vets all said to just get used to it . It came with the territory , so to speak . But people new to the " snorting " would almost inevitably think she was dieing !

Rest in peace my beloved Sassy / dog - ter .

My Lulu has the grossest of all possible gross habits - she likes to eat her own poo. She will literally go and then turn around to eat, unless I'm right there to pick it up at that exact instant. So absolutely disgusting.

You just described my dog. I mean EXACTLY. Except mine is a Basset Hound. Fart, smear, drip, drool, even paw-licking and dry-heaving. Gonna be honest...drives me nuts most of the time. My daughter adores his snurfly, snuffly, food-is-my-only-passion self, though. Sigh.

Shep has shat on my floor, barfed on my feet and crawled through the blackest, thickest mud you could ever find. And yet there isn't a thing on earth he could possibly do that would disgust me.

Why Shep rocks: http://thatangela.ca/2010/06/why-my-dog-rocks/

Oh yeah, and the Rottie-mix LOOOOOVES to eat goose poop! Hooray!

I have a pit-boxer-shepherd-mutt and a rottie-lab mix. One of them likes to drag her bum across the carpet... (GROSS and no she doesn't have worms). The other ... well, he likes to attend to his parts more often than is probably natural. I find both habits disgusting.

As mommy to a American Pit Bull and a Pit Terrier,,the problem is farts...tear gas doesn't even come close. The ONLY thing that has helped is feeding them plain yogurt in their food every day- it works like a charm. I give my dogs a high quality kibble that I purchase at a feed store -- not the food from the grocery store.