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28 Rules for Fathers of Sons

Every once in a while I come across a real gem on someone else’s blog that I fall in love with. Yesterday I somehow wandered onto a blog called Diapers & Daisies to a post written back in May called 28 Rules for Fathers of SonsAnd while there are a couple things I’d maybe add to some of these, I couldn’t help but think her post was fantastic.

It did well, but I think it deserves a lot more love, and Sarah (who I’m quickly learning is a mom blogger worth following) was kind enough to let me share her post with all of you. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did! And when you’re done, be sure to go check her blog out. :)

28 Rules for Fathers of Sons

1. Love his Mother. He will learn to love like you love, and hate like you hate. So choose love for both of you. Devote yourself to it. Love with your whole heart and express that love each and every day. Then, someday down the road, you will see the way he loves his own wife, and know that you played a part in that.

2. Let him drive. Every child remembers the first time they drove on daddy’s lap. For that one moment, he will believe that he is just. like. you

3. Teach him to be picky. Especially when it comes to women and burgers. Teach him to never settle.

4. Take him to a ball game. There is something about sharing a day of hot dogs, sunshine and baseball with your father.

5. Love with Bravery. Boys have this preconceived notion that they have to be tough. When he is young, he will express his love fully and innocently. As he grows, he will hide his feelings and wipe off kisses. Teach him to be a man who rubs them in instead. It takes courage for a man to show love: teach him to be courageous.

6. Talk about sex. Sometimes, boys need to know that all men are created equal.

7. Teach him to be a man’s man. Show him how to be brave and tough around the guys. Then, remind him on the ride home that it is okay to cry.

8. Share secrets together. Communicate. Talk. Talk about anything. Let him tell you about girls, friends, school. Listen. Ask questions. Share dreams, hopes, concerns. He is not only your son, you are not only his father. Be his friend too.

9. Teach him manners. Because sometimes you have to be his father, not just his friend. The world is a happier place when made up of polite words and smiles.

10. Teach him when to stand-up and when to walk away. He should know that he doesn’t have to throw punches to prove he is right. He may not always be right. Make sure he knows how to demand respect- he is worthy of it. It does not mean he has to fight back with fists or words, because sometimes you say more with silence.

11. Teach him to choose his battles. Make sure he knows which battles are worth fighting- like for family or his favorite baseball team. Remind him that people can be mean and nasty because of jealousy, or other personal reasons. Help him to understand when to shut his mouth and walk-away. Teach him to be the bigger better person.

12. Let him dance in tighty whiteys. Dance alongside him in yours. Teach him that there are moments when it is okay to be absolutely ridiculous.

704 comments
Annoyed
Annoyed

The title says "28 rules" but I only see 12 and some weird nonsensical thing that says "flip to page". This isn't a physical book so there is no need for turning pages. The only reason I can think for making a separate page with the remainder of the content is to maximize ad revenue at the expense of readability and convenience.


Yes, you do have the right to get ad revenue, but when your content strategy is so inconvenient and outdated it drives even more people to use AdBlock and other tools.

Martini730
Martini730

Nice article, but why did you show a photo of a 3 year old flipping the bird.  Come on!  Really?

no
no

don't cut his damn genitals for your own selfish reasons, for one.

BothaAbe
BothaAbe

A few important ones were left out. Teach him about GOD and the power of prayer. Teach him about respecting women, Teach him about helping those that have less than you, and respect for his elders. Teach him about responsibility and the rewards of hard word and teach him about respect for the law. Teach him to question things and if he believes strong enough to fight for his believes

Happy father
Happy father

yes I do agree with all except #26, no big belly my sons don't like it

and one day, just like Bert from Texas, I want to look back and say yes THANK GOD for his awesome gift. I don't want to be like my Dad, I am trying to be different 


heidi2
heidi2

I agree with every one of these, except for #26.  Growing a big belly means you aren't taking good care of your health, which means you are stealing your future with your son and possibly his son.  I would recommend changing it to Grow strong shoulders cause he might need them to lean on someday and if your shoulder are strong it shows you took care of yourself and intend to be there for the long haul.  

Alex Young
Alex Young

Bryce Mansfield it's worth reading

BertDowlen
BertDowlen

As I read Sky's comment I had to comment on what he said and about this piece A Single Dad  Laughing. This was sent to me by my Son. A son that I raised as single Dad. His email simply said "This is me and you" I was staggered after I read it. My reply was just "Son it was my pleasure". I have always believed that the greatest comment as father that I received from him was what he said the last night before he left for the Navy, I was so sad and afraid for him. He stopped me as we left the house and hugged me said "Dad I am ready and full of the love you gave me all of my life you made me what I am today. I have never forgot that moment. He is now married and both he and his wife serve in the Navy. At that moment I looked back on the path we traveled as Father and Son and thanked God for his guidance and I have never doubted the words he told me then. When I received this from him I thanked God that I had that relationship when he was a boy. I was amazed how so much of our lives together mimicked this blog and left us with a stronger father and son relationship than we ever had together. We talk often discussing many of the same things, the love for his wife, family, living a good life surrounded by good friends that want let you down and that he knows I will be here to catch him if he needs me. Only a Dad knows that love!


Bert From Texas

sky
sky

This is a good read and good info but this is written by a woman and what she thinks a good father should be to a son. This should be written. By a good father that has actual experience in the subject not just what she observes.

TomNutt
TomNutt

Most of these are great; I would not advocate #26 and strongly disagree with #22.  Your kids should learn that you are human and that you  trust them enough to admit it.  These  are great times to learn together and teachthem the right way to get answers.

Mark Barrett
Mark Barrett

I want to thank you for posting this. I am working on "Round 2". I have a 22 yr old son that I raised from 8 yrs old, now I have a 5 yr old. Many of the things listed I did and currently do. But I learned a few new ones. Thank you again.

Annoyed Father of 3
Annoyed Father of 3

I just had to get along by my stupid self because there was no all knowing mom around for my 3 boys. She had better places to be. Here is another thought. Teach your daughters how to deserve that special treatment you all think women just automatically deserve. Teach them not to be little bitches and teases. Respect is earned not just given

Nazila Asnadi Bakhshi
Nazila Asnadi Bakhshi

I love this. So powerful. Can you find some rules about mother and daughters. I would love to read that too

ChinOfSamAx
ChinOfSamAx

I would love to see a blog by a father telling women how to be a good mother and watch as he was lambasted as a misogynist.

AaronCEllis
AaronCEllis

29.  teach him to pull and slay as many girls as possible

Suzn Campbell
Suzn Campbell

Great read :) I am a Momdy (single mom)and raised 2 awesome sons.

Sabrina Says
Sabrina Says

That made me tear up a little. I like to think I'm enough for my son..but, a boy needs a dad to know how to be a man. I can only tell him what I think a man should be...I've done good enough as both, but would he agree? I dunno.

PatrickAndersen
PatrickAndersen

Generally good ideas, although I do disagree with some of it. I strongly disagree with point 22. Leading your children to believe you are an all knowing super human is wrong. You don't know all the answers in life and that's ok. Teach your children how to find answers to their own questions when you don't have them.


(Grow a big belly... Really. That's a sign of a good father?)

marfield
marfield

Love this and as for the pee part lol, i remember that as i as a mother had to teach my son how to pee standing up as his father would not,  i took a garden hose and stuck it between my legs and turned the water on low and told him "see pee like mommy" and know what after a couple of times he learned.  We also did it on the tree and he thought that was the coolest thing ever.  Take time to teach and spend time with them.  My son is 35 and still tells me everything and gives me hugs and kisses, i had to be mom and dad to them even with a father around and it was hell but i think i did a good job.  Being a single parent is hell but i take my hat off to them either male or female as it is a job that is tough but in the end well worth it.  Don't let others take away that pride u have of being a single parent, as long as u love your children that is the main thing.  

Ken E Young
Ken E Young

Proud to be a successful single dad!...

Jesus
Jesus

Let me guess, this woman's husband has a big belly, loves baseball and pink floyd, and is a pretentious douchebag about hamburgers?


Grow a big belly? Seriously? How about stay fit, so you can see your kids grow old.

Redd_USN
Redd_USN

@BothaAbe I do like this but I think the God one is left out because it does not apply to everyone, some people don't believe and others believe in a different god. But to the rest yes i think they should be included. 

remcentre
remcentre

@sky The truth is the same, no matter who speaks it.

AaronCEllis
AaronCEllis

@ChinOfSamAx wait a second here..."you would love to see some kind of blog written by fathers"? "telling women how to be a good mother"? (okay even more lost) lol..."AND, "watch as he was lambasted as a misogynist" ok, doesn't make much sense, makes some because I can guess what your at least trying to say. 

BrandyJuhl
BrandyJuhl

@AaronCEllis Teach your boy to be a man who breaks hearts? No. We have enough of those assholes....

ShawnMichaelAbrams
ShawnMichaelAbrams

@PatrickAndersen I think that is just some dude trying to justify "fat" as being OK, when it most certainly is not!  Grow a 6 pack Bro!...hahaha

T
T

How about taking it for what it is! Not everything has to be politically correct.

Annoyed Father of 3
Annoyed Father of 3

@Awww poor you You can't be that ignorant. I taught my children to respect everyone. Something your parents should have taught you. If you are stupid enough to believe women should sit on their asses and wait for the REAL MAN that's your problem I taught my children about the REAL WORLD

Annoyed Father of 3
Annoyed Father of 3

@Awww poor you You teach your children. That is if you even have children. Don't stick your nose where it doesn't belong you only come on these places to piss people off. Get over yourself and grow up. Just because your parents never taught you any better is no reason to jump on other people

Awww poor you
Awww poor you

REAL WORLD? This world where you whine and cry about the love of your life leaving you on the internet? Real men dont want pity for raising kids on their own. Real men get over that shit cause we're strong. Welcome to life....Looks like your dad should of read this shit.

Annoyed Father of 3
Annoyed Father of 3

@Awww poor you You are a real piece of shit. No one is complaining about raising their kids except for your parents and the lousy job they did raising you. Here's an idea since you are only on here to piss people off with your stupidity, go piss someone else off because I'm done with your sorry ass. Just because your parents were suck ass people don't take it out on everyone else. Do what you crazy fuckers do and just shoot them.

Annoyed Father of 3
Annoyed Father of 3

@erikaonthecoast My kids are in their 30's and quite fine thank you very much. Of course I have a serious chip on my shoulder since I don't agree with you. I'm sure everyone knows you are always right.

bophus
bophus

@Annoyed Father of 3  Wow, you have a real problem.  Maybe you should stop looking at the people who are leaving you and start looking at yourself for the issues.


You say you taught your children to respect everyone, but the first thing you said disrespected others, then you went even further and disrespected a person point blank.  


I find it incredibly hard to believe that you raised 3 productive children.  If they are productive, it had nothing to do with you.

justsayingmy2cents
justsayingmy2cents

@Annoyed Father of 3 @Awww poor you more like "Anger management problem father with 3 unlucky boys".  Please for the sanity of your boys and yourself, get help. And keep away from firearms and sharp objects. I will pray for your boys.