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Once There Was a Doorknob. And It Sucked.

I just got in a big fight with a doorknob. And I lost. I didn't just kind of lose. I lost like the fat pug at the Greyhound races kind of lost.

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Birth. Not for Weak Sauce Sissy Boy-Men.

My sister invited me into the room when my nephew was born. It was worse than I ever could have imagined. And I barely saw anything of it at all.

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