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The OTHER 15 Ways I Blew My Marriage

26. DON’T MAKE HER DO THE GROSS AND SCARY THINGS.
When we were dating, I was a knight in shining armor. Was there a spider that needed killing? I was the Gladiator. Was there a drain that needed a good hair-unclogging? Who else would she call but me? Was one of the kids losing her lunch in the entryway? Sit back my fair lady. I’ll clean up the puke. Then, the second we were married I told her to kill her own spiders. It was her hair clogging the drain, so why should I have to touch it? And it just seemed like a mom’s duty to “help” a sick kid.
IF I COULD HAVE A DO-OVER: I’d cinch up my damned knickers and do the gross and scary things that I was born to do. I’d remember that I fell in love with sugar and spice and everything nice, not slugs and snails and puppy dog tails.

BONUS! how do I put this? When she gets scared, she more often than not needs physical reassurance of the safety that she’ll only feel in the arms of her big, brawny, tough, macho man.

EXTRA BONUS! after doing the gross and scary things, you get to stand up and scream, “are you not entertained?! ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED?!” (name that movie.)

27. DON’T THINK YOU’RE SMARTER THAN SHE IS.
I have always struggled with an over-bloated “confidence” in my own intelligence, and unfortunately that carried over into my marriage far too often. Guess who always had the right answer about everything? Guess who always had to correct her when she was wrong? Guess who always had to whip out his phone to prove something she said was incorrect? Guess who would crap on her awesome ideas? Guess who was constantly DRIVING HER CRAZY with it?
IF I COULD HAVE A DO-OVER: I’d remember three things. One, know-it-alls drive everyone crazy. Two, know-it-alls usually end up alone. Three, know-it-alls are wrong, a lot. And they’re never as smart as they think they are. So, instead of thinking I knew everything and that I knew better ways of doing everything, I’d sit back and enjoy letting her make a lot of the decisions. I’d let her save face when she was wrong. And, I’d applaud the fact that there are a lot of areas of life that she knows a lot more about than I do.
BONUS! not knowing everything makes you look a lot less stupid.
28. MOVE AWAY FROM HER FAMILY. AND YOURS.
When we were first married, we would see my family all the time and her family almost as often. We spent almost every Sunday at my family’s house, and a lot of weeknights and weekends at hers. We spent nearly every holiday with our families. And every special occasion, too. And while family is usually great, it really kept us from developing our own working family dynamic, our own traditions, and our own strengthened way of living and doing things. It drug us into unnecessary drama. And most of all, it kept us from learning to lean on each other during our rough patches instead of on our parents or siblings.
IF I COULD HAVE A DO-OVER: I would move far away from both families for a year or two. I wouldn’t come back until we’d been through at least a few big marital challenges on our own without the involvement of any family at all. That way, when we did come back, we’d be strong on our own and our families would be great supplements to our marriage instead of major players.
BONUS! when you make your own traditions, you can finally add things in that your parents weren’t cool with. “And after we open our Christmas pajamas… everyone has to eat a pound of chocolate. And then they have to stand on their heads while screaming. And then they have to jump on their beds.” Stuff like that.
29. DON’T BE A TALK-HOG.
I often had a way of making everything about me. I’d come home from work and want to talk about me. I’d go to bed with her and want to talk about me. I’d want to talk about my successes, my ideas, my struggles, and my worries. Usually I’d realize I was being a talk-hog and I’d ask her about what was going on with her, but only listen with half an ear, hardly reply, and be anxious to move the conversation back to me as soon as possible.
IF I COULD HAVE A DO-OVER: I’d shut the heck up. And, because of my little problem, I’d try not to talk about me at all until I knew about her day, her successes, her ideas, her struggles, and her worries.
BONUS! when you listen, you hear nifty things that remind you how awesome and messed up and funny and perfect for you she really is.
30. DON’T DEMAND THAT SHE TELL YOU WHAT SHE’S THINKING.
I always knew when something was wrong. I always knew when something was bugging her. I always knew when she disapproved of something I said or did. And, I always knew when she was keeping her mouth shut about it. Being the great communicator that I was, I would badger her, and pester her, and harass her until she finally told me what she was thinking. And sure enough, it was usually what I thought it was, and the next world war would break out.
IF I COULD HAVE A DO-OVER: I’d shrug my shoulders and send serious thank you vibes to her for keeping her opinion or her disapproval to herself, even though I’d know they weren’t positive. I’d recognize the noble reasons she was doing it, and I’d respect those reasons. I’d learn not to take it all personally and I’d learn not to desperately need approval for everything I did or said.
BONUS! when war is averted, nobody ends up clobbered and wounded and hungry for blood. Which is always nice.
31. DON’T BUY INTO YOUR GRANDPARENTS’ GENDER ROLES.
I had no trouble letting my wife go join all the other wives on Sundays and fix dinner for all of us men. I also had no trouble letting them all do clean-up without our help. I enjoyed playing pool, or ping pong, or chattin’ it up with the fellas while the women toiled. It’s just what happens more often than not in my family, and I often brought it home with me during the week. After all. I had a job, so she did everything else. Isn’t that how it’s supposed to be? Well, apparently not because it always led to all sorts of justified resentment.
IF I COULD HAVE A DO-OVER:I’d realize that working a desk job is usually a heck of a lot easier than working at home all day. I’d jump into the chores that she had left when I got home so that we could both enjoy some quality free time later on. I’d insist on doing the dishes more often. I’d demand that she relax sometimes while I got the kids ready for bed. And, I’d never let myself think that her work was easier or less important than mine.

BONUS! appreciated wives show their appreciation for it in much more private settings, like the bedroom. And by appreciation, I mean they’ll surprise you with that incredible nerdy electric tie rack that spins.

Oh, and probably sex, too. I hadn’t even thought of that.

Man.

That’s a lot of dirty marriage laundry to air out in front of the world. I’ll probably never get a date now.

Love you all. Thanks in advance for sharing all these botched-it-big-time secrets of mine with others (you know, if you found value in them).

Dan Pearce, Single Dad Laughing

PS. Would love your comments on today’s posts (I do read every one of them). What do you agree/disagree with? What advice would you have added? What would your bonuses for that advice be? And, what is your opinion as to why so many people connected with and shared this list?

PPS. I know I joke about sex a lot in these posts. Get over it. Sex is one of the most important and often most dysfunctional parts of marriage. Working toward having lots of healthy sex ain’t a bad thing.

UPDATE 11/03/12: At your request, a printable version of these lists was made available to download.

1796 comments
M
M

Thank you for sharing your personal experiences in marriage here. I find myself agreeing with nearly every one of your points and wish my husband would learn those things before our relationship falls apart; largely because of how you messed up your marriages. I think people find comfort in you posts because they know they are not alone in how they are feeling and what they are experiencing in their marriages. Thanks again and best of luck to you!

FatimaObeys
FatimaObeys

I want to use this opportunity to thank my great doctor who really made my life a pleasurable one today. This great man Dr ZUMA ZUK who brought my husband back to me, i had 2 lovely kids for my husband, about 3 years ago i and my husband has been into one quarrel or the other until he finally left me for one lady. i felt my life was over and my kids thought they would never see their father again. i tried to be strong just for the kids but i could not control the pains that torments my heart, my heart was filled with sorrows an Ad pains because i was really in love with my husband. Every day and night i think of him and always wish he would come back to me, until one day i met a good friend of mine that was also in a situation like me but her problem was her ex-boyfriend who she had an unwanted pregnancy for and he refused to take responsibility and dumped her. she told me that mine was a small case and that i shouldn't worry about it at all so i asked her what was the solution to my problems and she gave me this great man phone number and his email address. i was doubting if this man was the solution, so contacted this great man and he told me what to do and i deed them all, he told me to wait for just two day and that my husband will come crawling on his kneels just for forgiveness so i faithfully deed what this great man asked me to do and for sure after two days i heard a knock on the door, in a great surprise i saw him on his kneels and i was speechless, when he saw me, all he did was crying and asking me for forgiveness, from that day, all the pains and sorrows in my heart flew away,since then i and my husband and our lovely kids are happy.that's why i want to say a big thank you to Dr ZUMA ZUK This great man made me to understand that theirs no problem on earth that has no solution so please if you know that you have this same problem or any problem that is similar, i will advise you to come straight to this great man. you can email [email protected]

LydiaEMill2
LydiaEMill2

After being in relationship with him for 3 years, he broke up with me, I did everything possible to bring him back but all was in vain, I wanted him back so much because of the love I have for him, I begged him with everything, I made promises but he refused. I explained my problem to someone online and she suggested that I should rather contact a spell caster that could help me cast a spell to bring him back but I am the type that never believed in spell, I had no choice than to try it, I mailed the spell caster, and he told me there was no problem that everything will be okay before three days, that my ex will return to me before three days, he cast the spell and surprisingly in the second day, it was around 4pm. My ex called me, I was so surprised, I answered the call and all he said was that he was so sorry for everything that happened, that he wanted me to return to him, that he loves me so much. I was so happy and went to him, that was how we started living together happily again. Since then, I have made promise that anybody I know that have a relationship problem, I would be of help to such person by referring him or her to the only real and powerful spell caster who helped me with my own problem and who is different from all the fake ones out there. Anybody could need the help of the spell caster, his email is [email protected] you can email him if you need his assistance in your relationship or any other problem.

FaithHenry
FaithHenry

I never knew people still have powers and make things happened this way. My name is Faith Henry am from American. my boyfriend Slay Scot left me for another girl for three months’ ever since then my life have been filled with pains sorrow and heart break because he was my first love who dis virgin me when i was 21 years old. about two years ago, A friend of mine called Bella told me he saw some testimonies of this great Dr AGBAGIE that he can bring back lover within some few days, i laugh it out and said i am not interested but because of the love my friend had for me, she consulted the great priest on my behalf and to my greatest surprise after three days my boyfriend called me for the very first time after three months that he is missing me and that he is so sorry for every thing he made me went through. i still can’t believe it, because it highly unbelievable it just too real to be real. Thank you Dr AGBAGIE for bringing back my lover and also to my lovely friend who interceded on my behalf, for any one who might need the help of this great priest here is the email address:([email protected]) or you can call the great man on (+2348052849204)

guest
guest

Great advice - I probably need to think about what I am doing wrong that isn't working for my husband after reading this.  Do you think though that it wasn't so one sided?  That maybe she wasn't doing things that you needed too?  Maybe we could get her take on what happened.  I am currently working on my list for my husband so that I can be a better wife.  Thank you for the help!

tessa
tessa

One other comment I would like to make for the women.  If your husband is a football fanatic, find ways to not label yourself as a football widow.  I personally like football, but only when I have family playing.  I do have a cousin on the Texans but he's injured and I've always been a Cardinals fan, even if I didn't care about another team.  My husband plays fantasy football every year and a grandson does too.  Last year our grandson pretty much ignored his team so I took it over in an attempt not to lose the fee to play.  lol  I became hooked.  I researched fantasy football up and down, learned how football is played, what the refs call or should have (have not) called, the positions, which teams had the best defense, etc.  I didn't make the playoffs last year but I decided to play again this year too.  It's a great way for me to satisfy my competitive side and do something with my husband that he likes as well.


Bonus:  Evidently he finds nothing sexier on Thursday night, Sunday and Monday night than his wife fighting for control of the remote because her QB / receiver combination is playing at the same time his insignificant kicker is playing.  The fact that I now comment on fantastic throws and catches (my man Fitz) is a real turn on as opposed to my laughing at players who run into one another, trip one another, have pants too tight, cool shoes, cute gloves, etc.  Combine all that with healthy snacks and a nice dinner and the night belongs to me (after the games that is).  ;-)

AshleeTompkins
AshleeTompkins

I definitely disagree with the "I'll probably never get a date now" bit. The ability to admit and learn from all this 'dirty marriage laundry' is an attractive quality. I feel like this should be a reason that you'd get more dates. The only mistakes you should ever be ashamed of or embarrassed about are the ones you haven't learned from and genuinely attempted to improve upon.

Rose
Rose

Thank you for your honesty in writing this list. It is great advice.


As far as flowers go, unless you’re in the city, you don’t always have to buy them. You can pick your own.  I remember a time that I was having a really bad day. On my way home, I saw a man on the side of the road carefully picking wildflowers. I don’t know who they were for, but it brought tears to my eyes.  I was thinking what a lucky person was going to receive those flowers.  Even though they weren’t for me, I felt the love being put in them and felt better. 

Another advice:  Don’t blame your spouse for hurt that he/she didn’t put there.  When you make the decision to remarry, also make the decision to fight with your own inner baggage. Yes, you can honestly discuss it with your new spouse so you can work through it together.  However, NEVER “take it out” on them.
The bonus:  Keeping it to yourself won’t give unnecessary pain in your current marriage and won’t put the power of your happiness in the hands of the person who previously hurt you.
Additional bonus:  Working through it honestly, positively and together with your new spouse may bring you that much closer to each other.

StaceyXavi
StaceyXavi

It was a complete sudden stop in my life when my relationship with my lover came to a verge of breakup  point without any reason and he said that he has fallen for someone else, it was Dr. Eziza who helped me get back my lover with a love spell and now we are happily married, thanks a lot Dr. Eziza. If you need his help to restore your relationship back, you can contact him via [email protected] +2348058176289

Anna
Anna

I have sent thins link to my boyfriend whom I have been arguing with a lot lately, so I genuinely hope he will read and acknowledge this.

Anna
Anna

This is just awesome!

RachaelJeeninga
RachaelJeeninga

Being passive-aggressive never works. I try really hard to never be, but my ex was all the time. He's mad? Silent treatment. Less affection. Little snide comments when he finally did talk.

And don't every jokingly be condescending or dismissive of someone's feelings. If they're hurt, and, or happy about something, it doesn't matter how irrelevant that thing is, don't show it. Soon they'll think none of their feelings matter at all. And even be afraid to talk about them.

Don't let minor things make or break you. Don't let pent up anger and frustration cloud your feelings. You fell in love for a reason, just because you're only focusing on the negative things, doesn't mean the love isn't there. Never let yourself forget you love them. Or they'll forget, too.

Liz
Liz

I hope there are at least a few men who will read this and actually pay attention.  Every single thing on your list applies to my own marriage ending.  Especially the airing every fault he thought I had (while he was perfect) to the world. And the sarcasm never stopped.

I also hope that you take what you learned and find a woman you will treat the way you suggested.

FatimaObeys
FatimaObeys

I want to use this opportunity to thank my great doctor who really made my life a pleasurable one today. This great man Dr ZUMA ZUK who brought my husband back to me, i had 2 lovely kids for my husband, about 3 years ago i and my husband has been into one quarrel or the other until he finally left me for one lady. i felt my life was over and my kids thought they would never see their father again. i tried to be strong just for the kids but i could not control the pains that torments my heart, my heart was filled with sorrows an Ad pains because i was really in love with my husband. Every day and night i think of him and always wish he would come back to me, until one day i met a good friend of mine that was also in a situation like me but her problem was her ex-boyfriend who she had an unwanted pregnancy for and he refused to take responsibility and dumped her. she told me that mine was a small case and that i shouldn't worry about it at all so i asked her what was the solution to my problems and she gave me this great man phone number and his email address. i was doubting if this man was the solution, so contacted this great man and he told me what to do and i deed them all, he told me to wait for just two day and that my husband will come crawling on his kneels just for forgiveness so i faithfully deed what this great man asked me to do and for sure after two days i heard a knock on the door, in a great surprise i saw him on his kneels and i was speechless, when he saw me, all he did was crying and asking me for forgiveness, from that day, all the pains and sorrows in my heart flew away,since then i and my husband and our lovely kids are happy.that's why i want to say a big thank you to Dr ZUMA ZUK This great man made me to understand that theirs no problem on earth that has no solution so please if you know that you have this same problem or any problem that is similar, i will advise you to come straight to this great man. you can email [email protected]

AmandaGreenhead
AmandaGreenhead

hello dan,


thanks for sharing. i enjoyed the frank and honest bits of your wisdom, and i agreed with all of them. 

Jan was here
Jan was here

Hello Dan,  I read both blogs of why your marriages ended.  I too have been married twice and I know why I left both.  For the exact reasons you have mentioned in these blogs.  Perhaps someday soon I will write my own response to each of these.  I have already done a lot of soul searching of where I went wrong with my own actions in my marriages.  I think it would be a good exercise for me to compare and match them to another Man's perspective as well.


The reasons I shared your blogs is because it resonated with me in a very profound way, beyond the topics covered.  For me you humbled yourself and shared your vulnerabilities.  One of the key Characteristics I look for (I have 8 of them) in a potential partner is Authenticity:  I usually listen to the tone of their voice when they talk about the things, events and people in their life.  How willing and open is he at expressing his vulnerabilities.  (weakness is not the same a vulnerability) In the midst of his confidence, strength, drive, and sense of purpose is still okay with himself to admit his flaws or fears.  He has learned from his mistakes and admits to them honestly.

~Cheers my friend, and thank you!

 _____________________________

In case any single amigos out there is curious of read my 8 Characteristics of a High Quality Man:

1)  Honorable:  Does he stand for a higher purpose than himself?  He should be enlarged by some sense of purpose and service in this world, not fulfilling his ego.  (i.e family, friends, community, world)  A true man is in touch with his heroic core.

2)  Authentic:  I usually listen to the tone of their voice when they talk about the things, events and people in their life.  How willing and open is he at expressing his vulnerabilities.  (weakness is not the same a vulnerability) In the midst of his confidence, strength, drive, and sense of purpose is still okay with himself to admit his flaws or fears.  He has learned from his mistakes and admits to them honestly.

3) Excitement:  Is he positive and excited about the momentum he is generating in his life?  Does he identify himself with the positive/happy things or elements in his life?

4)  Financial Responsibility:  Can he pay his own bills first of all?  Does he save and invest?  Beware of shows of extravagance.  Granted he should enjoy the fruits of his labor, but does he stake his identity on those things?  Does he have a steady source of income (there are many ways to create income these days)?  If he's learning a new trade or skill and is committed to it - Great!!  This shows he is on a path for self-improvement.  Believe it or not, you want a man who spends in moderation...guess what ladies this means you DO NOT want a man that will spend lavishly on you.  Sorry forget the diamonds and jewels. He works hard, is careful, respects hard work, and is NOT a show off.  Bottom line – it is NOT how fat his wallet is, it IS his CHARACTER.  He could live in a Refrigerator box, and be the man for you.  He just needs to be able to afford the necessities of living in his box.  LOL

5)  Sensually Alive:  ahhh, My favorite…you really need to cut men a little slack here, because all they know is sex, sex, sex.  However, he should ALREADY be open to sensual pleasures.  (i.e talk about their “love” of well prepared food, cooking, wine, working with their hands, etc.)  He should be able to describe the “feel” of the kind of woman he desires.  Remember if he is open to the pleasures of senses (sight, smell, taste, touch, sound) he’s probably going to be a more satisfying lover for you. He will be more attentive to giving and receiving pleasure. ;)  LISTEN to a man who is PASSIONATE about the world he lives in.

6)  Man/Women Dynamics:  You want someone that is curious and open to learning about man/woman dynamics.  Does he find the masculine feminine dance to be an interesting, happy challenge or an annoyance?  You can tell a LOT from how he details what he wants and what he is prepared to give and behave- not what he expects from YOU.  Plus he is AUTHENTIC about it. Remember:  Life is about loving, learning, and seeing things beyond our own perspective.  :D

7)  Interested in You:  Come on let’s face it…he has to be curious and interested in you.  He should be asking questions that demonstrate a genuine interest in your character, and your uniqueness-YOU.  You want a man who sees your uniqueness and holds you special.  The key to knowing he is genuine is if he remembers things you have said.  Pay attention to what he notices about you, what he adores about you, and what he compliments about you.  If he takes in the special details of your inner world and then delivers on your needs or desires….all the better.  :D

8)  Love:  Perhaps the most important is that he is driven by expanding love, not fear.  His conversation and life is suggestive with all the things he LOVES: people, pets, experiences. (i.e what he loves about women (especially you), his family, friends, job, etc.)  If he pits himself against the world and lives in fear, you will never get close to him, no matter how close you may seem to get.  You will always be part of the outside world. 

Lastly, he may have all 7 characteristics of a High Quality Man, but if he does not have love or is not ready for love you will not change that so you have to move on.  If he says he is not looking for a relationship or is not ready for a serious one…he is NOT ready.  Sorry.  There are a lot of great guys out there who just don’t want or are not ready for a relationship.  Keep them close to your hearts and be their friend.  Find another soul to be your hero!

LiberataCarey
LiberataCarey

I read this and the previous post on the 16 ways too and I must say Dan, life has surely given you awesome lessons and the your reflection on those lessons are so beautifully expressed through your words. I specially loved and seen your side of the truth in your blog "You just broke your child." 

It rung so true to the experiences little children have and specially, the one I too had with my dad as a child. Thank you for taking time to reach out through your words of wisdom.

Keep up the great work of love.


Regards,


Liberata Carey


TaraOtis
TaraOtis

Actually made me cry...going through this now. Seems these are quite common truths so many of us live through, some learning from and others not so much....

Thank you:)

AshleyMOlszewskiIvory
AshleyMOlszewskiIvory

I completely respect you breaking down your own personal do's and dont's of marriage. As a wife I have to say your do-overs are all I've ever wanted to see from my husband. Granted trying to follow those rules day in and day out within the chaos of daily life is difficult! I think we work under the common misconception that if you are with the right person that marriage should take no work at all. So NOT TRUE! After reading this I've decided to ditch classes today and go golfing with my husband one last time this season! Thanks for the advice! 



-AOI

DanaMorgan
DanaMorgan

Dan -- Thanks for your honesty with these.  I wish my soon-to-be-ex had seen them before emotional neglect turned to emotional and verbal abuse.  Much sadness here -- and much recognition of the truths in your writings.  (The workaholic side was me -- avoidance of the non-conflict.  I'm not perfect either.)  Keep on speaking your truths!  Even when I don't agree with you, they always provide me food for thought.  All the best -- Dana


PS to all the spellmongers out there -- get a real job!!  Sheesh. 

20something
20something

If this is how guys really think then I NEVER want to get married.

RachaelWisner
RachaelWisner

I think your advice is on point and I will have to keep these things in mind, I've only been married almost two months now and things are still great but reading your list will help keep things in perspective, I'm sure lesbians have these same exact issues. Thank you.

slimcolvin1
slimcolvin1

I was a HIV-AIDS patient and I got it from cheating on my husband. It was sort of a payback but a week later I was told by a friend that the person who I cheated with had the HIV-AIDS virus and did not tell me. I was so stupid by not using a condom I thought since he was an old school friend he
was trustworthy. But I was wrong. I cried and cried. Two days later, I got a phone call from my friend and she told me about a person who is known by another friend, who can help me. I could not let my husband know what I was going through. I finally got his email address: [email protected] and I text this man my story and he replied me immediately saying i should be calm and told me that everything will be OK.I could not come to terms with what I was hearing but then I concluded it did not matter because I was so broken up I just needed help. I was going out of my mind literally. I was confused with what he was telling me, but I listened. He told me about some materials i need to buy that he needed to cast the spell and I said OK. I bought the materials to him, I sent down my picture to him and my positive result sheet and he replied me that i am going to be negative under 3days.I message Him every 2hours for 2day and I knew he thought that I was crazy but I did care I needed a shoulder. Behold, the third day he messaged me i should go for a test that i will be negative. My marriage could be broken
because of a stupid mistake and my life was on the line. I remembered when I was going to get the results of my re-test I called him up again and told him that I was going to get my results today and his reply was “so" and that everything will be as he explained. I knew then that he was getting tired of me calling him, maybe I was wrong. Well I got my results and the first person I
called up was him - again. As he said hello I started to cry and cry. I could not believe it. I was given a second chance in life.This man is a great spiritual HIV/AIDS healer,his healing spell on aids healing is very powerful .please brothers and sister, contact Dr Zuma zuk [email protected]

Btru71
Btru71

I was married 13 years then divorced 7, now we are back together. My husband had to learn the hard way also. He started off wonderful then he turned into Lucifer. LOL! I don't know what happened he assumed everything was about him. The world revolved around his moods! Everything on your list he now does... its crazy! Even the hand holding!!! Not only would he not close the bathroom door, he would ruin my morning shower...EVERY MORNING!!! LOL

NoraLotte
NoraLotte

My name is Nora Lotte and my husband of a year walked out on me about two and a half months ago and now we are going through a horrible painful divorce. i am not sure WHY he walked out. I am just s0 scared that he and i will never be together again. And what’s worse i am afraid that he will find someone else and I just CAN’T handle that. so i go online for help on how i can get him back. thanks to DR OBOM with the help of this great man i was able to get my husband back for good. you can reach him on [email protected]

DariaReinhartame
DariaReinhartame

My name is Daria Reinhartame, am from usa. i want to use this opportunity to thank my great doctor who really made my life a pleasurable one today. This great man DR.AISABU brought my husband back to me, i had three lovely kids for my husband, about four years ago i and my husband has been into one quarrel or the other until he finally left me for one lady. i felt my life was over and my kids thought they would never see their father again. i tried to be strong just for the kids but i could not control the pains that torments my heart, my heart was filled with sorrows and pains because i was really in love with my husband. Every day and night i think of him and always wish he would come back to me, until one day i met a good friend of mine that was also in a situation like me but her problem was her ex-boyfriend who she had an unwanted pregnancy for and he refused to take responsibility and dumped her. she told me that mine was a small case and that i should not worry about it at all, so i asked her what was the solution to my problems and she gave me this great man email address. i was doubting if this man was the solution, so i contacted this great man and he told me what to do and i deed them all, he told me to wait for just two day and that my husband will come crawling on his kneels just for forgiveness so i faithfully deed what this great man asked me to do and for sure after two days i heard a knock on the door, in a great surprise i saw him on his kneels and i was speechless, when he saw me, all he did was crying and asking me for forgiveness, from that day, all the pains and sorrows in my heart flew away,since then i and my husband and our lovely kids are happy.that's why i want to say a big thank you to DR.AISABU. This great man made me to understand that there is no problem on earth that has no solution so please if you know that you have this same problem or any problem that is similar, i will advise you to come straight to this great man. you can email him at: ([email protected])...

LauraBenson
LauraBenson


my husband was always cheating on me and even spends nights out. sometimes he even leave for the entire week end, pretending that he has work, but i know he just go meet women, my life was lame until, i asked [email protected] to cast a spell for me. so that my husband can be a good man and  after his spell, my husband changed automatically, he now spends much more time with me and the kids and we're a family again

LydiaEMill1
LydiaEMill1

After being in relationship with him for 3 years,he broke up with me, I did everything possible to bring him back but all was in vain, I wanted him back so much because of the love I have for him, I begged him with everything, I made promises but he refused. I explained my problem to someone online and she suggested that I should rather contact a spell caster that could help me cast a spell to bring him back but I am the type that never believed in spell, I had no choice than to try it, I mailed the spell caster, and he told me there was no problem that everything will be okay before three days, that my ex will return to me before three days, he cast the spell and surprisingly in the second day, it was around 4pm. My ex called me, I was so surprised, I answered the call and all he said was that he was so sorry for everything that happened, that he wanted me to return to him, that he loves me so much. I was so happy and went to him, that was how we started living together happily again. Since then, I have made promise that anybody I know that have a relationship problem, I would be of help to such person by referring him or her to the only real and powerful spell caster who helped me with my own problem and who is different from all the fake ones out there. Anybody could need the help of the spell caster, his email is [email protected] you can email him if you need his assistance in your relationship or any other problem.

MattRussell1
MattRussell1

I read your first last on this topic a long time ago and was looking for it to share with my little brother who is about to take his own vows soon. I was so happy to find this as well. Very good advice and very fun to read. Thank you so much! This article as who as the last should be weekly required reading for us married men.

LauraBenson
LauraBenson

thanks to my great father who help me get pregnant this man is really a great man he is great and powerful he made me who i am today i cried to him and told him my problem i never believe he can help me i only give him a try that is how i got pregnant with the help of this great man the great Dr Lawrence he is really powerful you can contact him for any kind of problem i believe he has the power to help you i so much trust in him you can contact him on his direct email [email protected]

EllynArkwright
EllynArkwright

Have never believed in the supernatural or talk less of spell or even voodoo. In my head there was nothing on earth that was ever going to get me involved in such thing but life as we know throw s**t at your door and some how the doors opens up and let it strike you. ************* About five years ago if anyone had asked me if i trust my twin sister with my life, believe me i would bet my life on it that i can. I couldn’t even bring myself to think that my twin sister can put a knife at my back Yes i know everything about our childhood and youth age was always about who is better that who in everything and frankly i was better that me in academic aspect of life. I was smarter more skilled that her but this ought to be no reason to want to have every guy that was dating me or should it? cos the last i checked twin protect themselves not try and hurt the other. That was what my twin sister is all about. Even though we looked identical she was cuter than i was. She had her way around boys more that i did. Like she knew how to get what she want in whatever way she wanted it from both boys and girls. I don’t know, she had a way or rather she was good at messing around with peoples brain not like in a psychic way, it was more like all about her body. In other words you can say she was very sexy, attractive and hard to resist. I have always had to work very had to get what i want but she, things just falls in her lap without having to labor for it. She falls for every guy she knows i like. I mean every guy i dated in high school broke up with me to date her and it was really hurtful for me. I thought it was just high school and boys cos in college it wasn’t like that and for the first time in forever, not that i thought but the comparison between us over. Some how the old life we had arose again this time it happen that the guy my sister fell for, fell for me and i fell for him also i made sure it was okay with her before i went on the first date with him. I don’t want this to seem like a story so i will just cut to the chase. My twin sister was having an affair with my long time boyfriend the every guy one we both fell for but picked me. I mean i only found out the day he told me was no longer want to be with me that he was in love with my twin sister and he has been cheating on me with her. This was after four year of dating. I was heart broken and i wished to God that he had told me he was sleeping with me and my twin sister when our relationship was still young i would have like always, backed down and let them bask in what ever they think they were doing. But no they waited and in the process i fell deeply in love with him. I mean who wouldn’t fall for him he was cute caring and always knew what to say at the right time. I know i ought to have been mad at him for what he did but i was more mad at my sister for what she did cos i mean if she had turned him down he would have left her on her own and she was not even sorry for what she did to me. she became my twin sister in high school all again wanting to hurt and ruin my life steal the man i love. Heaven knew i was in love with this guy and hating him was not even an option for me all the hatred was channeled to my twin sister cos some how she made him hers. I lived in pain for a whole year having to see her face every family thanksgiving day with the man i love sitting side by side kissing him and hugging maybe to piss me off or something it only made me hate her more and more desperate to get my boyfriend back. I got him back finally yes i did, but i can fail to say i did not use the normal way. Metodo Acamu help me cast a spell to kill their relationship and rekindle ours to how we were before they started their affair. In case you asking asking yourself how possible it is believe me i don’t know and won’t tell you i understand cos like i said i never in my life thought it would result to me using a spell or something but there is one thing i know is that the spell worked for me and made my love fall in love with me again. There not much i can say to emphasize how the spell worked all i know is that i was asked to get some materials for the spell of which i was to buy and go present the materials myself to Metodo Acamu or send over or send the expenditure to him to get the materials need for the spell. To me it was less expensive to wire the cash to him to get the materials cos they are the expert in it. But i know in the end METODO ACAMU pulled through with the spell and made me whole again. Like honestly my main purpose for writing this was to let those out there know that other comment about METODO on the internet is really cos here i am tell you my story it can get anymore real than it is already. I can never forgive my twin sister even though i have got my love back. Use this email address as METODO ACAMU contact {metodoacamufortress @ yahoo. com} note, do not space this email address when contacting him........

Angela F
Angela F

So... believe it or not, I found your original post on Pinterest of all places, and just had to click through to see if a guy was actually going to have the balls to list the things he did wrong in his marriage.  I hope by now that you realize one of the reasons I suspect this "thing" has gone viral is because it is so incredibly rare to see anyone post (male or female) how their own shortcomings were at the root of a failed relationship!  Being a divorced woman, just knowing there is A GUY out there who'd do such a thing is (1) enlightening (2) a little ray of sunshine ;)  Kudos.  As Maya Angelou said "When we know better, we do better."  Something tells me your little foray into wearing your heart on your sleeve for all the world to see will be an asset, not a liability in the future relationship department.  Probably makes you not too shabby in the Dad dept. too!  I wish you all the best, wherever your journey takes you.

wiznaght peter
wiznaght peter

Love can be very tricky, and does not always work out how we would like it to. This can cause us heartbreak and uncertainty in our personal lives. However, now we are able to alter our relationship, or the relationship of a loved one with the assistance of Love Spells. I have tried it and it worked perfectly well for me, i wont want to share my story for reasons best known to me. I got my spell cast at lord mazula SPELL TEMPLE. His Spells cover most aspects of Love. If you want a spell in any aspect of you love life, here is were you can contact him [email protected]

JulietJose
JulietJose

All praises goes to Dr. Wakina for restoring one of the most important things in my life which is “LOVE”. I got back my sexy queen from my jealous friend after forcing her to breakup with me. We have loved each other and sharing romantic moments for two years before she started acting strange and stop seeing me, she stopped replying my text and don’t receive my calls or call me anymore. I was so angry with myself because I couldn’t love another girl and I know very well that she was forcefully taken away from me because I started seeing her with my friend.


I got inspired by messages people write about Dr. Wakina in a local magazine and on internet too, I was afraid to contact him because I do only woman and I haven’t read of my of case. I decided to try because I have the right to love anybody, it’s my life. Thanks to Dr. Wakina who assured me and gave me confidence, he consulted his Oracle and brought her back to me within four days. No wonder people keep talking good about him, this man is so powerful, and he saw that she is my soul mate.


I have fulfilled my promise to write my own testimony and tell people about him and his Oracle how there are giving people joy and happiness. Make sure you participate and win back your love. Email him: [email protected]

JoyPhilip1
JoyPhilip1

During my search on the internet on how i can solve my relationship issue i came across article about Dr. EKPEN TEMPLE, Through Which my broken relationship with my ex lover was restored. I'm Jessy by name and my lover has left me for many years before i came in contact with Dr. EKPEN TEMPLE. After contacting Dr. EKPEN TEMPLE i narrated my story to him and Dr. EKPEN TEMPLE promised to help me get my lover back and i am telling you right now that my lover came back to me within 48 hours that Dr. EKPEN TEMPLE has cast the spell on him. Trust me the fastest way to restore your broken relationship is through Dr. EKPEN TEMPLE and you can contact him via mobile +2347050270218 or email at [email protected] And for further proof of what i have just said then you can search on his name on the internet to see more about him.

chris
chris

dan, i am struggling to keep my marriage together. looking around for sound advice on things to work on, i have not seen more humble, heartfelt, practical advice. i àm a know-it-all stubborn a-hole much of the time. i have too little tact and suave. many of the points you make, including putting down your wife in front of others, only touching her when you want to have sex, being sarcastic and passive aggressive in a mean way- those things are me much of the time when i am frustrated. i don't know what is going to happen in my life, but i have a feeling that in the end i will get what i deserve. i think it's pretty cool of you and probably kind of therapeutic to post your transgressions. it made a difference for me at a pretty dark moment in my life"

SwartHamp
SwartHamp

i have read testimonies about this great spell caster called prophet James how he helped people to bring their lover back. so i decide to give him a try, i am here today to give my own testimony on how this great man brought my ex back within 48 hours for just to contact him. this girl has broke up with me over 6 weeks but she came back just within 48 hours that prophet James said he will make her come back to me. just contact this man and he will bring your ex back here is his email address mail. [email protected]

ElbaRene
ElbaRene

I am writing this little article to thank Dr. Wakina ([email protected]) and my Boyfriend (Andrew) who made efforts to restore my confused spirit. My Ex vowed that he must fight with his last strength to see that I am sad and don’t last with my current Boyfriend after I broke-up with him because he didn’t have any positive idea about keeping a Girlfriend, he was so abusive and unromantic. So I decided to break-up and moved on with a guy who values me and gives me every satisfaction that I have wanted. This made my Ex so angry and went extra miles to use charms on me and gave me restless and confused spirit, I couldn’t concentrate anymore with Andrew and the feelings for him was gradually dying. I didn’t know how Andrew noticed that it’s a spiritual attack and consulted Powerful Doctor Wakina who used his spiritual eyes to look into my spirit and traced my case to my Ex. This Great Man called back my dying spirit because I was almost going crazy; he broke the charm on me, cast a reunion love spell and cleansed me before I came back to my senses. My Ex has confessed that Dr. Wakina sent fire to him and made him restless; he said that he couldn’t sleep at night because he was always hearing voices shouting that he should confess and destroy the charm.


Story short; I am myself now and in love with my Boyfriend for two months now without issues and we have just discovered another taste of love because of Dr. Wakina strong power. Contact him today to get back your lover as Andrew did for me and set him/her free to realize who their true love is. His email is [email protected] 


Name: Elba Rene

Country: USA

EveetyHOKate
EveetyHOKate

My name is EVEETY HO KATE i will like us to share tips on how to identify a real LOVE spell caster cos alot of people have fallen victim of scam as i have come across lots of comments lately (i was a victim too) and from experience and what i know i decide to open this thread, only fake spell caster  ask for the followings: COURIER CHARGES: no matter where you are in the world, no matter the distance and continent a real spell caster will cast a spell effectively without you seeing it or the spell caster getting it to you to use it so long as he has the names or pix..the spell will work itself.. STRAIGHT: no excuses for failure, if money was needed in the first place for courier he should have say so, so one can know how prepared he is..i did rather pay $2000 at once to get my result rather than paying $200 for excuses to get more money..its not bad paying for items but the end result might be an excuse THREAT: if you get fed up of sending money after money, they begin to threaten one with death and madness.. NIGERIA; about 80% of them are Nigerians not saying they dont have real spell casters cos they are spiritually gifted in Africa but the impersonation is too much, the fake are more than the real.. i fell a victim of scam twice to a certain dr wodu and dr isaka they both ripped me to shred before i realized almost $3700 was gone until i came across Dr Lamano who told me how to know a fake spell caster, he helped me CAST A LOVE SPELL without failure or excuse in 5 days.. My Husband is back and am happy now for about a month..
his e-mail is [email protected]   lets beware of scammers and share experience, suggestion and solutions..thanks.....////....

MohammedAlogha
MohammedAlogha

Message: Reading john Maxwell article about a spell caster namely Odumodu was, i will say the best that ever happen to me this year based on the fact that i had a lot problem that i was trying to over come.I had problems at home which affected my work greatly. I was now always in a cross fire with my boss.I really don't want to tell story here so i guess i would just go strange to the point on what i have to say.My wife wanted out of our marriage for no just reason.We were married for four year and i think we were happy though we had no kids, it was her idea not to have any cos she wasn't ready to be a mom yet and i was okay with it i mean i didn't like the idea but i went along with it just to please her.It was always like that i mean she always get what she wants.All i wanted was to see her happy i could never do anything that will make her so unhappy.This was all i did wrong that is make her have it her way all the time. I mean that was the reason she gave during our therapy session.She wanted out of the marriage cos i was to nice. From what she said, i was the kind of man ever woman will die for but she wanted a real man to enforce his will no her meaning was i was to week a man for her.And that was the least of therapy session we had cos like she said we where wasting our life together and no amount of therapy was going to get us back together.I was a total mess thinking of how i was being dumped based on how much i loved my wife and how good i treated her,I really didn't know if she was ungrateful or just confused about what she wanted that is mid-life crisis but the bottom line is that she left me and who knows maybe for another man.I was still in love with her, she was the love of my life and i still wanted her to come back that was when i saw Eva-Yolanda article on Odumodu.When i contacted him he made me known that i will have to go through all the spell casting process.Like he said most people are too scared cos of trust issues.I had trust issues, but getting my wife back was my ulterior motive and from my experience with Odumodu i can tell you he is 100% truthful and honest with his customer.I was asked to get some material to prepare the spell and after which he sent me a package contain the spell and the rest just happen the way it was suppose to happen i got my wife back and she was my wife back again i mean she was not that woman who wanted a hard man she was woman i fell in love with who loved me cos i am me.If you want help or fell he can help contact him with his email address [email protected].... ONCE AGAIN HIS EMAIL ADDRESS IS: [email protected]... Or u can add he up on Facebook by he name (Olwen odumodu)

CarolenAndrew
CarolenAndrew

I never knew people still have powers and make things happened this way. My name is Faith Henry am from American. my boyfriend Slay Scot left me for another girl for three months’ ever since then my life have been filled with pains sorrow and heart break because he was my first love who dis virgin me when i was 21 years old. about two years ago, A friend of mine called Bella told me he saw some testimonies of this great Dr AGBAGIE that he can bring back lover within some few days, i laugh it out and said i am not interested but because of the love my friend had for me, she consulted the great priest on my behalf and to my greatest surprise after three days my boyfriend called me for the very first time after three months that he is missing me and that he is so sorry for every thing he made me went through. i still can’t believe it, because it highly unbelievable it just too real to be real. Thank you Dr AGBAGIE for bringing back my lover and also to my lovely friend who interceded on my behalf, for any one who might need the help of this great priest here is the email address:([email protected]) or you can call the great man on (+2348052849204)

JoyPhilip1
JoyPhilip1

I have come to understand that when ever life looks like the world is coming to an end for you there is always one person that will always come to your rescue. My lover left me without even saying goodbye to me, But i am so happy i came across DR. EKPEN TEMPLE when i was on the internet, which i was able to get in contact with this powerful spell caster who the world recognize as Dr.EKPEN TEMPLE, he was very helpful to me because through his help my lover returned to me within 48 hours. This is best thing that has ever happened to me in my life and i will want all those out there who are suffering from heart break to benefit from Dr.EKPEN TEMPLE by contacting Dr.EKPEN TEMPLE through these details via email: (((ekpentemple@gmail. com))) or mobile number on +2347050270218 I will advise that you keep this contact details

Stephieowens
Stephieowens

So, I feel your pain. I've been married and divorced.....wait for it....3 times. Yep...I said 3. It used to suck and I used to be totally embarrassed by it and never wanted to admit it to anyone. But then I did something even more taboo....I sought counseling. Yes, I said that too. I was nervous and didn't really talk much at first about it. But then I realized, "Hey, you're paying for this stuff so you might as well maximize it." So, I did start to talk and it just poured out of me. A lot like your advice here. It's been several years now and I can joke about it, laugh about it, and I even have some pretty good advice myself once in a while. Still single but I at least know now what I want and what I don't want and how to behave when I finally get it. You're "advice" that you think isn't really advice....well, it's pretty darn good. Spot on you might say. And it does go both ways. Keep it up....you're on the right track!!!

Merilee S
Merilee S

Great post. I've been married for a year and a half and we both have dumb little things like this to work on. Nothing major, just little things that become big over time. I appreciate your solutions so much and the humor was great! Now... to work on them together... :)

SwartHamp
SwartHamp



I am joes candra, I promise to share this testimony all over the world once my boyfriend return back to me, and today with all due respect i want to thank PROPHET suleman for bringing joy and happiness to my relationship and my family. I want to inform you all that there is a spell caster that is real and genuine. I never believed in any of these things until i loosed my boyfriend, I required help until i found a grate spell caster, And he cast a love spell for me, and he assured me that I will get my boyfriend back in two days after the spell has been cast. Three days later, my phone rang, and so shockingly, it was my boyfriend who has not called me for past 6 years now, and made an apology for the heart break, and told me that he is ready to be my back bone till the rest of his life with me. PROPHET. suleman released him up to know how much i loved and wanted him. And opened his eyes to picture how much we have share together. As I`m writing this testimony right now I`m the most happiest girl on earth and me and my boyfriend is living a happy life and our love is now stronger than how it were even before our break up. So that`s why I promised to share my testimony all over the universe.All thanks goes to PROPHET suleman for the excessive work that he has done for me. Below is the email address in any situation you are undergoing a heart break, and I assure you that as he has done mine for me, he will definitely help you too. [email protected] that is his email address bye

AnnPerez
AnnPerez

Sometimes,Life can be very displeasing especially when we loose the ones we love and cherish so much. in this kind of situation where one loses his/her soul mate there are several dangers engage in it. one may no longer be able to do the things he was doing before then success will be very scarce and happiness will be rare. that person was created to be with you for without him things may fall apart. That was my experience late last year. but thank god today i am happy with him again. all thanks goes to Dr. EDIONWE, i was nearly loosing hope until i saw an article on how Dr. EDIONWE could cast a love spell to make lovers come back. There is no harm in trying, i said to my self. i contacted him via email: [email protected] words will not be enough to appreciate what he has done for me. i have promised to share the good news as long as i live.

MakomvaNaome
MakomvaNaome




My is Julie, me and my husband get married over couple of years now and we were living fine with no distraction and my husband loves me so much until one day when i saw a girl who work in the same office with my husband came home and check on him at first i thought they have nothing to do with each other and she asked if my husband was at home i told her that my husband went out a couple of minutes ago, so she left that day.... so later on when my husband came back so i tried to make him happy because he told me that he is very tired and he said he wont be able to catch fun with me so from there i begin to notice that my husband is having an affair with another woman so i thought of it and a friend was trying to console me... so i stood over my friends advice so one day as i came back from the supermarket i heard a female voice crying and shouting so i tried to check who was it, to my surprise i found out that it was the same girl that came looking for him, when i caught them doing all this my husband quickly drove me out and never let me in... so i was very worried and i was confused, i had nothing to do.. later, on the third day he came to my moms house and told her that he don't loves me and he is going to be divorcing me in some couples of days so i cried and a friend came to me and said that i should not look at this problem and think that it is over, she said i should fight back..... so later i went on a search on the internet on how to get my husband back so i look over and i saw someone testifying about DR EHOHO at first i thought he wont be able to get him back until when i found out that magic really, is real, so he helped me get my husband back to me and now my husband bought me a car to show me that he will never do such again..... so if you have this same problem and you think is too big for you to handle just contact him tell him that it was Julie who refer you to him he will help you get your problem solved OK... and in case you do need his contact email just email him now at [email protected] you can call this number to rich him +2348140033845  he will help you get your problem solved within a blink of an eye......

DoSomethingRight
DoSomethingRight

@slimcolvin1 SHAMEFUL.  Telling HIV/AIDS patients to continue to lie to sexual partners (instead of IMMEDIATELY INFORMING) about being HIV/AIDS Positive can end up with the partners becoming infected, all while you run about trying to cover your tracks with spells and magic.  Own up to your mistakes and go get proper medical treatment and get all other sexual partners TESTED IMMEDIATELY.

JoyPhilip1
JoyPhilip1

@Stephieowens I have come to understand that when ever life looks like the world is coming to an end for you there is always one person that will always come to your rescue. My lover left me without even saying goodbye to me, But i am so happy i came across DR. EKPEN TEMPLE when i was on the internet, which i was able to get in contact with this powerful spell caster who the world recognize as Dr.EKPEN TEMPLE, he was very helpful to me because through his help my lover returned to me within 48 hours. This is best thing that has ever happened to me in my life and i will want all those out there who are suffering from heart break to benefit from Dr.EKPEN TEMPLE by contacting Dr.EKPEN TEMPLE through these details via email: (((ekpentemple@gmail. com))) or mobile number on +2347050270218 I will advise that you keep this contact details

Noturniptruck
Noturniptruck

@DoSomethingRight @slimcolvin1 

Um.....this is spam. The email addy  and name mentioned in the OP is the same one recommended in another earlier response detailing a completely different calamity.