Arrested teenager

“Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a great battle.” ~Philo of Alexandria

After 21 years of self-destructive inner-battles, I finally admitted my biggest secret to myself and to the rest of the world. That day, and the day my son was born, were the two most incredible and wonderful days of my life.

Here on Single Dad Laughing, I started what I call “The Truth Box.” I asked you all to anonymously share a difficult secret that you’ve never told anyone. There were only two sections to fill out on the form. “What everyone thinks is true,” and “what actually is true.” More than five thousand secrets were shared. Every Thursday I share 60 of them here. Completely random and as they came in.

These truths aren’t meant to entertain. They aren’t meant to bring us down, either. They’re just an incredible and poignant (though sometimes heavy) reminder that we all are fighting our own great battles.

Oh, and a couple days ago I experimented with a new spin on the truth box. I asked you to share something someone did that currently upsets you, and then share what their great battle probably is. It definitely didn’t go as planned (too many hard feelings involved) so I decided not to do that one.

Pulled from the Truth Box: Week 6
1
What everyone thinks is true:
I have really big muscles
What actually is true:
I always Photoshop my muscles to be much bigger than they are in real life.
2
What everyone thinks is true:
that i am perfect im every way. mother friend sister daughter.
What actually is true:
i struggle with bulimia. have for over 15 years and binge purge multiple times a day.
3
What everyone thinks is true:
I’m heterosexual
What actually is true:
I’m bisexual
4
What everyone thinks is true:
That I am struggling a little with my faith.
What actually is true:
I have never believed in God.
5
What everyone thinks is true:
I am peaceful and content.
What actually is true:
Inside I feel like an anxiety filled storm.
6
What everyone thinks is true:
I love my grandmother and I’m her favorite.
What actually is true:
She was abused and I think she moldested me as I have had a flashback. I forgive her and love her. I’m breaking the cycle.
7
What everyone thinks is true:
I got divorced the first time because the marriage didn’t work out.
What actually is true:
What really happened is that I went to visit a platonic townie friend from college in Florida, had a torrid affair with him for 3 weeks and threw hubby out.
8
What everyone thinks is true:
That I’m smart, funny, confident, so together, happily married, a great mom, have lots of friends.
What actually is true:
I’m scared shitless most of the time, I love my kids so much I think they deserve a better mom, my husband has cheated on me more than once, I drink every day, I need a friend.
9
What everyone thinks is true:
That I’m a super hero for caring for my acutely disabled, palliative daughter.
What actually is true:
I’m a mess on the inside, teetering on the brink of emotional destruction Every. Single. Day.
10
What everyone thinks is true:
I’m a good mom.
What actually is true:
I can’t wait for bedtime each night and look forward to them being at their dads.
11
What everyone thinks is true:
I am close minded and obsessed with rules.
What actually is true:
I crave structure because my life has been filled with chaos.
12
What everyone thinks is true:
I’m a deeply spiritual person.
What actually is true:
I don’t know what, if anything, I believe.
13
What everyone thinks is true:
I had a powerful spiritual experience and saw my dead sister.
What actually is true:
I made it up so that I could be accepted at church.
14
What everyone thinks is true:
I’m okay
What actually is true:
Im hanging on by a thread
15
What everyone thinks is true:
I’m your average everyday bus driver who is doing it because he loves kids.
What actually is true:
I took on this job after my retirement to get away from my wife who I don’t like spending time with.
Continued on next page.