big-mess-co-parenting

What I’m about to write is a very sensitive subject, and because of that I will have to leave many details out. Thank you for understanding.

I have often written about my good relationship with my ex-wife, her husband, and the co-parenting rapport we have all had. For example, with the This Dad That Dad post. Things have been pretty smooth sailing for us.

But it would make me a fraud if I shared only the good and never the bad. Maybe you wouldn’t ever care, but I assure you I would. I mean, I like to know that who I present myself as here on this blog is the person I actually am, living the life that I actually do. That means the good, the bad, and the ugly.

And things have gotten ugly lately between Noah’s other parents and me.

I don’t know exactly how it happened. I mean, I know what triggered it. I know how it all spiraled out of control since it started, but I don’t know how it even got to that point in the first place. Before then, I thought we had all been getting along just fine.

And this is where I don’t want to share details. The who, what, when, where, and why. It’s not my place to share the details. It wouldn’t be fair to Noah’s co-parents and it wouldn’t be fair to Noah. After all, no matter how thin, there are always two sides to every pancake.

All you need to know is that it’s a big mess right now. An ugly mess.

For four years we’ve all gotten along. Mostly. For four years we’ve all worked well together as co-parents. Mostly. I’ve seen other people with their exes, I’ve seen how ugly it’s gotten, and I always wondered how it happened. I always wondered how it could ever get to that point. To some degree, I took pride in the fact that we never let it get to that point.

I still don’t know how we got here.

All I know is that some weird iceberg sunk what I thought was our unsinkable ship. All three of us had our “last straw” at the exact same time and it made for the perfect storm that temporarily dethroned our co-parenting relationship.

Anger. Threats. Hurt feelings. Viciousness. Inability to work together.

I thought we were better than that.

This kind of thing doesn’t happen to people like me, does it? It doesn’t happen to good parents. Like us. Does it? It doesn’t happen out of the blue and when people have gotten along so well for so long. Does it?

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Dan Pearce is an American-born author, app developer, photographer, and artist. This blog, Single Dad Laughing, is what he's most known for, with more than 1.4 million daily subscribers as of 2017. Pearce writes mostly humorous and introspective works, as well as his musings which span from fatherhood, to dating, to life, to the people and dynamics of society. Single Dad Laughing is much more than a blog. It's an incredible community of people just being real and awesome together!