Doll issued a sea shore

Over on the SDL Facebook wall, I asked you what the creepiest thing was that you’ve ever heard a kid say.

I had no idea what to expect.

This is what I got. Be sure to read the others as well.

24 More of the Creepiest Things Ever Said by Kids

  1. My daughter was 4 at the time drawing some pictures. She was drawing a person so I asked her who it was and she said her name was Lisa. I was like “oh that’s nice, who’s Lisa?” Her response was… Lisa WAS a girl, she went hunting with her daddy and died, she got shot and bled all over.” I was kind of shocked and asked her who told her that story… She said, “it’s not a story, it really happened” I asked her how she knew about it and she says “because Lisa told me.” ….. I was pretty creeped out. To this day she swears that Lisa herself told her about this.
  2. My son (11 at the time) wasn’t excited about the idea of me dating after my divorce. In all seriousness, he said, “Mom. I want you to die alone.”
  3. “I’m going into the guest room to play Angry Birds so the creepy guy won’t watch me.” I asked who she was talking about and she pointing to an empty place by the couch and said “Him, the creepy guy who hangs around sometimes.”
  4. My daughter came in my room one night and said to me ” Mommy that man in the picture in the living room is in my room talking to me.” She was talking about a picture of my Grandpa that died when I was 14 years old. She knew all sorts of details.
  5. My daughter told me when she grew up she wanted to have a vagina as big as mine
  6. My son is 3 1/2 and has discovered that any stimulation to his “parts” causes it to grow. He said to me (while he was having his bath) the other day “mommy my penis is big and strong! Take a picture of it!”
  7. I was watching a cartoon online that involved a character having his arm torn off. Just as the arm is off and the blood begins to spew, I hear my friend’s 2-year-old cousin whisper from right behind me, “Excellent.”
  8. My niece was crying, “I want my mommy!” My brother said,”She’s right there!” She replied, “Not her! I want the one I had LAST time!” She was two.


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Dan Pearce is an American-born author, app developer, photographer, and artist. This blog, Single Dad Laughing, is what he's most known for, with more than 2 million daily subscribers as of 2017. Pearce writes mostly humorous and introspective works, as well as his musings which span from fatherhood, to dating, to life, to the people and dynamics of society. Single Dad Laughing is much more than a blog. It's an incredible community of people just being real and awesome together!