I wrote this a while ago (while we were still together). It’s been sitting in my drafts folder. A couple days ago, I read it and sent it to the trash folder. Then I had a good sniffle, okayed it with the Farmer’s Daughter, and decided to share it anyway…
Okay, first of all, if you’re an icky perv and you read that title in an icky perv kind of way, and you’re expecting an icky perv kind of blog post, you’re going to be sorely disappointed today. No naughty-naughty no-no sharing on this blog.
Or maybe I should start writing about my sexual exploits more often. I mean, sex is pretty dang funny. At least it should be. I’ve always said, if you’re not laughing in the sack (most of the time), you’re not doing it right.
But no, you’re not going to get that here. I’m much too respectful of my girlfriend and her don’t come a knockin’ ways to share anything like that. The most I can do is tell you this story.
Once upon a time, last night, I was laying in bed talking to the Farmer’s Daughter. She was nestled up on my arm. We were both, you know, feeling it. And then I woke up the next morning wondering what the heck happened and how it was possible that we both fell asleep and missed our golden opportunity. The end.
But that’s not what this post is about.
This post is about all the fun we have at bedtime.
And no, not that icky perv fun you gutter-minded individual you. Geez. Is my mind the only squeaky clean mind around here?
Anyway, I am really curious if anybody else here is as weird at bedtime as we are. I really am wondering. I’m wondering if we’re an anomaly or if we’re straight up crazy. And I figure, who better to ask than all of you.
I mean, while you’re laying there next to your significant other, do you ever just get the urge to grab the covers, yank them completely off of them, wrap yourself in them, and make them come and get them if they want them back?
And does that ever start a straight-up war that lasts for two hours or more in which you both tackle each other, pin each other down, push each other off the bed, and do everything you can to disarm the other and get the covers back?
And does that ever lead to accidental groin hits, elbows to the face, and head smacks on the foot board?
And does that ever lead to lots of panting, laughing, sweat, and giggles?
No, seriously. I’m curious. Because we do that all the time. And we kind of love it.
I also am really curious if, while you’re laying there next to your significant other, do any of you slowly reach down and grab a dirty sock off of your foot, then lunge with the speed of a rabid yak and shove it into their face while yelling, “dirty sock! Dirty sock!”
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