Weird confessions

We’re all normal.

And when I say normal, I mean that we are all crazy, and strange, and weird. All that is normal. Believe me.

I myself have my oddities. I have weird things I do that nobody else knows about. And that got me to thinking. Would other people fess up and confess their own weirdnesses if I gave them an anonymous place to do it?

There was only one way to tell. So, I setup an anonymous form with only one question.

What is the weirdest thing you do that you never tell anyone else about?

Your answers have making me feel weirdly normal ever since. Hahaha. Enjoy.

01
I always have to tap my elbow on the table before I take a bite of food. If I don’t, I can’t put the food in my mouth. ~Anonymous
02
At work I sometimes go to the washroom to take a nap on the throne. ~Anonymous
03
All the doors on my house have to be locked before I can poop. ~Anonymous
04
I like to pretend that I have control over automatic doors in stores, and that it’s my power that’s opening them. ~Anonymous
05
When boarding an airplane, I fart while I’m walking through first class while I make my way to my coach seat. ~Anonymous
06
I absolutely cannot turn on my headlights if I think another driver can see me do it. I have to pull into a parking lot and stop to turn them on. ~Anonymous
07
Sometimes I’ll wake up in the middle of a nice sleep to find that I have been holding one of my arms straight up in the air. ~Anonymous
08
I eat all the broken animal crackers first, including all the broken off pieces. Only after that can I enjoy eating the whole crackers. ~Anonymous
09
I only will use a bathtub if it is on the lowest floor. If it isn’t I’m afraid the floor won’t withstand the weight of the tub, water, and myself and I’ll fall through the floor. ~Anonymous
10
I narrate what I’m doing in my mind like a documentary…”she opened the fridge to get the milk”…”she fumbled with the keys as she opened the door” etc. ~Anonymous

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Dan Pearce is an American-born author, app developer, photographer, and artist. This blog, Single Dad Laughing, is what he's most known for, with more than 1.4 million daily subscribers as of 2017. Pearce writes mostly humorous and introspective works, as well as his musings which span from fatherhood, to dating, to life, to the people and dynamics of society. Single Dad Laughing is much more than a blog. It's an incredible community of people just being real and awesome together!