Over on the Single Dad Laughing Facebook Page, I asked a simple question. “What is the most embarrassing thing your child has ever blurted out to others?” More than 1,500 of you answered.
And, just as I had hoped, you didn’t fail to deliver some of the best gut-grabbing laughs I’ve had in weeks. Here are a few of your replies…
The Most Embarrassing Things Ever Blurted Out By Kids
- My then 2 year old went through a phase where she associated crying with getting hit or hurt (she went to daycare and there were a couple of kids who had trouble with hitting). Any time I cried she would ask me if daddy hit me. We were at Disneyland and I was about 5 months pregnant and totally emotional so I started crying for some reason and my daughter yells “Daddy! Did you hit mommy again!”
- Walking through the bathroom vanities at Sears, my 3 year old niece announced, “sometimes my daddy pees in the sink!”
- I was cooking and my daughter sat on the counter beside me. As I pulled a hot fry pan off of the stove, I accidentally grazed her bare leg with it, giving her a terrible burn. A few weeks later, while in the grocery checkout with a new fry pan she says, “Mommy, please don’t burn my legs with a hot fry pan again, ok?”
- My daughter invited the local firemen who were grocery shopping to “pascetti” dinner. When one replied, “your mommy doesn’t want a bunch of firemen in the house.” She quickly said, “Its ok, my mommy loves firemen.”
- After being pulled over for the third time in a month, the highway patrolman was about to give me a warning, when my son asked, “how many times does mommy have to get pulled over before she finally gets a ticket?”
- We were walking through a store after my daughter’s first day of preschool, when she announced to the whole store, “my teacher has crabs!” We thankfully established that it was “hermit” crabs.
- My son was 4, and his dad was hurrying us home because dinner had disagreed with me. When we arrived, I jumped out of the car, and heard him yell, “Hi neighbor! My mom has to poop!”
- My daughter told the daycare lady ” My mom’s underwear goes up her butt!”
- This came out of my 4 year olds mouth after his father and I filed for divorce. “My momma has a new job. Daddy said she’s a gold digger!”
- When my husband was being deployed, my son kept telling everyone his dad was getting divorced. I had to explain to a lot of people that we were NOT getting a divorce.
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