1. My daughter, before knowing the difference between boys and girls, upon seeing her Dad naked…”Eeeeeeew! Dad, what’s wrong with your vagina? That is the ugliest vagina ever!”
  2. When I was having a talk with my son, he was about 10 at the time, I made a comment about something and his response was, “Wait, you can do it more than once??”
  3. My daughter, age six, gets in the car after school and states, “Mom, Bailey told me he wants to have sex with me… but, don’t worry. I’m not going to do it.” I said, after regaining my composure, “Do you know what sex is honey?” She said, “Uh… nope!”
  4. Our daughter, about 4 at the time, walked in on us early one morning and she yelled, “Daddy, if you are going to wrestle with Mommy, go out and do it in the yard!”
  5. What’s a period? My friend thought “Oh no!” but launched into an appropriate menstrual speech. Her daughter said. .. Well I still don’t get it. The middle school kids always talk about 1st period and 2nd period…..
  6. My kids believed masturbating was fishing. It’s funny until they ask people if they want to go masturbating…
  7. I used to be a nanny for a family. The little boy was 2 1/2 and potty training. It was summer, and hot. He had a potty outside, as well as inside. While training, he hung out in big boy underwear, or was naked so he could run to the potty when he had to go. I walked into the living room from the kitchen and he was sitting in his birthday suit, watching a cartoon, playing with “it” when I asked what he was doing, he replied, “I’m makin’ a big penis, Britt,” like it was no big deal. My 19 year old self was in shock!
  8. We had sent our son to get ready to bathe one night. He reappeared in a minute or so completely naked. While waiting patiently, so as to not interrupt, he began shifting from foot to foot and pulling on his penis. When asked why he was doing that, he replied, “Because my penis was just asking for that.”
  9. My daughter appeared out of nowhere holding my vibrator (turned on, no less!) and said, “What’s this, Mommy?” I took it away asking her not to touch things that don’t belong to her, and to never go into my closet. “Yeah… but… what is it?” I said, “Never mind that!” She looks at me, cocks her head to the side, and says, “Is that your practice penis?”. I was completely speechless…for a full minute. I finally told her it was her stepdad’s and I didn’t know.
  10. My boyfriend was visiting when my then 4 year old came up to my room and said, “Mommy I had a bad dream,” and started to climb into bed with me. Then she noticed him and said “Oh, hi Mr Tyler. Did you have a bad dream too?”

You guys (and your awesome kids) rock.

Dan Pearce, Single Dad Laughing

If you missed the first half, you can find them here!

PS. I usually don’t ask for this, but I will the next several posts. Will you please go to the SDL page on Facebook and “like” the link I shared to this post? Facebook has been burying links a lot lately and it will really make a difference. Thanks SO much for helpin’ a blogger out! 🙂

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Dan Pearce is an American-born author, app developer, photographer, and artist. This blog, Single Dad Laughing, is what he's most known for, with more than 2 million daily subscribers as of 2017. Pearce writes mostly humorous and introspective works, as well as his musings which span from fatherhood, to dating, to life, to the people and dynamics of society. Single Dad Laughing is much more than a blog. It's an incredible community of people just being real and awesome together!