Over on the Single Dad Laughing Facebook wall, I asked the question:
What is the funniest thing a kid has ever said to you about sex, before they knew what sex was?
These are a few of your amazing replies.
- Heard my boys talking once trying to remember what a girl was called that liked other girls… They decided it was Canadian…
- My 5 year old niece after hearing that we are expecting a baby: “Yep, that’s what happens when you share your toothbrush. I’m never sharing my toothbrush. Ever!”
- My little cousin saw his baby sister naked. He said “Ewwwwwww gross… her butt crack goes all the way to the front!”
- My son came home from 1st grade and told me a classmate was pregnant. I said ,”How did that happen?” He said ,”I dunno, but I hope it ain’t mine.”
- When I found out what sex was, I was disgusted. I immediately went to my grandfather and angrily and incredulously said to him, “You had sex SIX times?!“ and walked away disgusted. He has six kids. I couldn’t understand why he laughed when I said that.
- I was telling a friend of ours that our 3 year old son had walked in on us “hugging.” My son then yelled proudly to my friend, “And bouncing!” She thought it was hysterical. I wanted to crawl in a hole to die.
- My kids think sex is the gender box you check on forms.
- This is a conversation heard between my two sons who were sitting in the backseat of our vehicle. Kid 1: Hey mom, can boys make babies alone? Me: oh sh**, here we go… No, baby, both moms and dad have different ingredients to make a baby. Kid 2: Like Vitamin D?! Me:(chuckling)…couldn’t hurt! Kid 2: AND WINE?! Me: (sputtering, choking on laughter) Most definitely at this point, honey!
- When my son was a baby, my daughter (8 years old) was very intently watching me change his diaper. I took this as an opportunity to explain a little bit about the differences between boys and girls. I told her that what her brother had was what makes him a boy and what she had was what made her a girl. She looked at me completely horrified and with tears in her eyes she said, “Why can’t you just tell by their voice?!?”
- Mom: Do you know what pornography is? Child: No…I know what archery is!
CONTINUED ON NEXT PAGE