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  1. When my 13 year old son was 6, he came home from kindergarten and asked what a “taint” was. I sputtered and asked him what what was? He said “I asked my teacher what a taint was and she told me to talk to you!” Torn between amusement and horror, I asked why he wanted to know and where he heard the word. He said his uncle was talking about a taint for his car the other day. After going back and forth for another minute we deduced that he was talking about a tint… a window tint. We got a note from the teacher via email later that night.
  2. Well it wasn’t about sex. I’m a teacher and we were writing down ideas for science fair projects. One of my students wrote for his idea, “How to clean penis.” He didn’t know how to spell pennies.
  3. One day my 4 year old runs into the living room and states, “Guess what Mom? I know where babies come from!” And I said, “Where?” She squats makes a grunting noise and replies, “You poop them out of your butt!!”
  4. After taking a very carefully worded 15 minutes to answer my 5th grade son’s question about the definition of a “condom”, he replied, “Oh, so it’s the same as a rubber?” I was ready to smack him!
  5. At 4 I told my mum “I don’t like it when you and daddy play growly bear.”
  6. My son was about 8 when he asked me if I was “bio sexual.”
  7. My younger sister was taking anatomy in school and the class was studying the reproductive system. She came into the kitchen and asked what “rhythmic stimulation” was. My Mom turned red and said, “ask your sister.” I was laughing so hard I couldn’t tell her. She went to my dad who was watching TV. I chased after her because I had to see this. She asked again. My dad looked at her and started changing the channels. He then proceeded search for a channel saying “I pay for cable. There has to be porn on here somewhere!!” I laughed so hard I cried!
  8. My daughter (3 or so at the time) told me she was glad she didn’t have a “nasty tail” like her Dad and brother!
  9. My son who is seven said, “I know it hurts getting a baby out of ya, so it sure can’t be any fun putting it in ya.”
  10. My son came home from school talking about sex. He had received a lot of misinformation so I decided to explain it to him truthfully. He stared at me horrified for a bit then my husband walked in the room. My son looked right at him and yelled “Oh my gosh! You had to do THAT to get ME! ” followed by hysterical laughter.

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Dan Pearce is an American-born author, app developer, photographer, and artist. This blog, Single Dad Laughing, is what he's most known for, with more than 2 million daily subscribers as of 2017. Pearce writes mostly humorous and introspective works, as well as his musings which span from fatherhood, to dating, to life, to the people and dynamics of society. Single Dad Laughing is much more than a blog. It's an incredible community of people just being real and awesome together!