Small kids

Over on the Single Dad Laughing Facebook wall, I dared you all to do something. This was my post:

I dare you to, right this second, ask your small child (if you have one) what is the number one thing you could do better as a parent and post their word for word answer here!

I didn’t know what to expect, but your answers had me rollin’ or “aawwwwwing.” Once again, you and your kids came through! Hahaha. And the best part is, there were enough hilarious answers to get a few posts out of it. Here’s the first one!

How to Be a Better Parent… According to Small Children. Vol. 1

01
Ummm… Own a zoo. Then I could look at giraffes and their purple tongues.
02
I don’t know. I don’t even know what mothers do.
03
Get your own Legos.
04
My 5 year old: lose weight Me: And how would that help me be a better parent? Him: You’d look hotter. Me: What does that have to do with my parenting? Him: I like having my dad and if you were more hotter I could have more dads.
05
He told me I should let all the girls he likes spend the night.
06
Drink more beer because it makes you happy, and if you’re happy, I’m happy.
07
Don’t make me wipe my own butt.
08
Stop saying you are fat or ugly. It isn’t true and makes my heart hurt every time you say it.
09
Not texting when you’re driving or speaking to people on the phone when you’re driving.
10
Trust me more, and listen to me more.

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