Our Seventy-Two Dollar Nap

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I didn’t stay awake the entire flight just to keep my sleeping child from curling up and kicking said man next to him.

Seriously. Why couldn’t they sit us next to Marry Poppins? She would have been slightly more helpful by being overly sweet and drugging him into a deeper sleep.

Here is what else I didn’t account for…

I didn’t account for the two hour time change. In other words, our flight that was landing at not-quite six AM was actually landing at not-quite four AM where we were coming from.

I didn’t account for the fact that there was a layover halfway through and that we’d either have to keep our children awake to the end of the first leg, or let them sleep and deal with the grumpiness of waking up in the middle of the night and being forced to walk and drag backpacks. We opted to keep them awake.

I didn’t account for the fact that they wouldn’t be able to stay awake, and just minutes before landing, would both conk out, causing not just a lack of sleep by the end of our journey, but a heightened level of prematurely-woken crankiness as we switched planes.



I didn’t account for the fact that the person in front of me on that next plane would continually slam her seat back trying to get it down even further on these legs of mine, which are attached to my 6’4” body.

Here is what else I didn’t account for…

I didn’t account for the fact that because we were getting there so early, there would be no shuttles to the cruise port.

I didn’t account for the fact that there was nowhere really for the taxi companies to drop us off due to the whole world still being asleep.

I didn’t account for the fact that the Fort Lauderdale airport is actually a tiny airport with nowhere to eat, sleep, or even wiggle our bums back and forth.

I didn’t account for the fact that the Expedia guy was wrong and check-in on the cruise ship wasn’t actually until 1 PM. Two hours later than planned. Yes. The math says that we had five hours to burn at that point with two impossibly wiry and cranky kids, and two completely sleep deprived and cranky adults.

I didn’t account for the fact that our kids would be *just* too small to effectively pull their own giant suitcases over bumps and cracks and building frustrations.

I didn’t account for the fact that our attempt to burn off all five hours in an IHOP across town would be impossible because… kids who are in a state like that can’t sit in a restaurant for even twenty minutes, let alone 5 hours.

Hm. I guess it wasn’t actually a string of bad choices. It was just one really bad choice with lots, and lots, and lots, and LOTS of crappy consequences. The last of which was us, attempting to sit it out in that IHOP, wanting to cry.

Let me be clear.

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Dan Pearce is an American-born author, app developer, photographer, and artist. This blog, Single Dad Laughing, is what he's most known for, with more than 2 million daily subscribers as of 2017. Pearce writes mostly humorous and introspective works, as well as his musings which span from fatherhood, to dating, to life, to the people and dynamics of society. Single Dad Laughing is much more than a blog. It's an incredible community of people just being real and awesome together!