When I got my very first kidney stone, I didn’t know what it was, and I literally thought I was dying.
One moment things were just fine. I remember I was goofing around with my brother at the urinals in a bathroom at the marina of Lake Powell. Now, don’t be weird about that. Brothers goof around anywhere and everywhere. I guarantee he probably pushed me from behind while I was peeing, and I probably pretended to peek over the stall and make some comment about, I don’t know, whatever brothers do to tease each other. And yes, we were both adults.
I just know I was happy. Life was good. I hadn’t a worry in the world. And suddenly, my back started aching. At first it was minor. It just felt like a strained muscle or something, no big deal.
Within four minutes, I was on my hands and knees outside of the bathroom, violently throwing up from the pain which had suddenly consumed me. I had never had pain like that, and I had never felt pain like that. It was like a horned and sharp-toothed monster was trying to violently eat its way out of my innards.
My family gathered around to figure out why I suddenly was in peril (was it that obvious?). I told them through gasps, “I don’t know, something is very wrong inside of me.” They were the only words I could get out before I threw up once more.
There were no hospitals within hours. There was, however, (somewhere nearby) a little health clinic at the lake. And I mean the kind which is setup in a tiny makeshift hut of sorts, meant to deal with bumps and bruises; certainly not with failing organs or other such trivial things.
My family somehow got me there. They took me inside. The medical person on staff took one look at me and smiled. “It’s just a kidney stone.”
Just a kidney stone? JUST a kidney stone? Did this woman not understand that something inside me was in the process of killing me? They put me on an exam table. My chest puffed upward as my back arched in more agony and pain. My family who was in the room with me all immediately felt at ease after hearing the diagnosis, even in the midst of my obvious and forthcoming death. Good thing it was just a kidney stone, I’m glad YOU all feel better about THI… The pain hit again. I screamed out loud inviting death to come quickly. The medical person told me not to worry, she’d just shoot me up with some morphine and I would love life again. Good God f*** yes, don’t talk about it, do it now! I couldn’t talk, only think desperate thoughts.