There is a word you’ve probably heard to describe others, but not often. It is, however, a word that I think needs to make a come-back. Big time. Will you all help me?
The word is…
Now, you’ll see here that dastard used to be such a common word. Back hundreds of years ago, I could tell you to “stop being such a dastard!”
Or, I could tell my sister, “do not accept a date with that buffoon, he is so dastardly.”
Or, I could look you in the face, draw my sword, and say, “I challenge you to a duel, dastard!”
What does dastard mean, exactly?
That’s it. It’s a word which sounds way cooler than the words we often use now for cowardly…
Chicken. Pussy. Wuss. Scaredy Cat. Yellow Belly. Poltroon. Recreant.
Plus “dastard” has the “mean & sneaking” connotation added to it. In other words, it’s the perfect word to use when talking about those occasional mean, sneaking, and cowardly exes. Or those occasional co-workers who do crazy things behind our back out of insecurity. Or, I don’t know… almost every Mother-in-law ever?
Hahaha. That was a joke. Please don’t hunt me down and do your dastardly thing, ex-Mother-in-laws of mine. You’re wonderful, perfect people, just like you always pointed out.
Anyway… The number one reason it needs to make a comeback is because it just sounds awesome to use in speech. “Dastard.” “Dastardly.” And let’s create a couple of our own because in language you can do that. “Dastardize.” That obviously should exist. And how about… “dastardon’t” (as in, why don’t you just “dastardon’t do that, okay?”
Now, don’t confuse “dastard” with “bastard.” They are two very different words and it wouldn’t be fair to “dastard” if you use them in the exact same ways. A bastard (in comparison to dastard) is just a straight-up vicious, despicable, or unlike person. A dastard is an undercutting and shifty coward. Got it?
And though “bastard” generally has a male connotation to it, dastard can be used with either gender.
Now, who’s with me? Shall we bring back “dastard?” Gold sticker if you use “dastard” properly in a comment. Three gold stickers if you help me bring dastard back by creating a meme using it! Hahaha.
Dan Pearce, Single Dad Laughing
PS. Mad props to my sister Amy for bringing this one up, as well as its need for a come-back!