I saw it on Amazon. And I needed it.

Badly.

So badly.

Normal price: $79.99.

And look! Four and a half stars from a whopping 239 people! That’s legit!

Wow. 78% already bought. 78% already… gone?!

On sale, Black Friday only, right then, right there, for $19.99.

I didn’t know I needed it until I saw it. I didn’t even really know such a thing existed before I bought it. But the moment I saw it, I knew it would quite possibly be the most important purchase of my life.

After all, it was usually eighty bucks!

And right now only twenty? Including shipping?! I would be stupid not to buy it, right? It would even be irresponsible.

I refreshed the app. What?! 84% now purchased! That’s not good! Crudola! I gotta jump on this! NOW!

Button clicked. Confirmation page loaded. Intense and deep satisfaction settled-in.

I bragged to my closest friends of my amazing deal. “Why would you need that?!” they replied.

First of all… rude.

“THERE ARE SO MANY THINGS I CAN DO WITH THIS!” I chimed back rather defensively. There would be no buyer’s remorse for this one. Not when I got the deal I got.

But then I went to bed. And tried really hard to think of a single thing I would do with my new purchase. I fell asleep trying. And I woke up.

And sleep had done something to let me know one inevitable truth… I really didn’t need that. In fact, I couldn’t think of one thing I would use it for.

But. But. But. $19.99!

And I’m now the proud owner of…

THIS!

dan-pearce-monocular

A brand-spanking new monocular, baby!

The package had been sitting on my couch unopened for a week because I haven’t needed it… yet.

Don’t worry. I will eventually find a use for it. I may be drawing blanks right now. It may gather dust for weeks, months, years, or even decades. But I will find a use for it.

Oh, wait. This was a use for it! A blog post! My impulse purchase wasn’t for nothing after all.

Darn you to heck, black Friday! You got me again.

Dan Pearce, Single Dad Laughing

SHARE
Previous articleThat Mom is NOT My Type
Next article24 NEW Elf On The Shelf Ideas You Haven’t Seen on Pinterest!
Dan Pearce is an American-born author, app developer, photographer, and artist. This blog, Single Dad Laughing, is what he's most known for, with more than 1.4 million daily subscribers as of 2017. Pearce writes mostly humorous and introspective works, as well as his musings which span from fatherhood, to dating, to life, to the people and dynamics of society. Single Dad Laughing is much more than a blog. It's an incredible community of people just being real and awesome together!