CONTINUED FROM PREVIOUS PAGE
  • 11. When my son was about three, he said to me sadly:

    “Mommy, I don’t like that man.”

    I said, “What do you mean, honey?”

    He replied, while pointing at the ceiling corner, “He sits up there and laughs at me.”

CREEPY SDL_ICON 2303
Awesome SDL_ICON 21
Meh SDL_ICON 82
2406 votes so far.
  • 12. My child once told me:

    “Mommy, don’t worry I won’t kill you. Not today.”

CREEPY SDL_ICON 1908
Awesome SDL_ICON 260
Meh SDL_ICON 227
2395 votes so far.
  • 13. My husband works as an education coordinator at a biological research station...

    Every summer he runs a day camp for kids and teaches them about ecology and nature. One day one of his campers told him, “I want your job when you die.”

CREEPY SDL_ICON 243
Awesome SDL_ICON 459
Meh SDL_ICON 1427
2129 votes so far.
  • 14. My eldest child, when he was 3...

    …looked me dead in the eye and quietly muttered, “I’m going to chop you into little pieces and put you in the oven.”

CREEPY SDL_ICON 2247
Awesome SDL_ICON 74
Meh SDL_ICON 126
2447 votes so far.
  • 15. My 4 year old daughter was playing with her Barbies by herself.

    “She’s not THAT mean.” “Well, maybe I shouldn’t have hit my brother!” Now yelling, “You can’t take me away! I’m telling!” My daughter runs into kitchen where I am and grabs hugs my leg very tightly and starts crying and yelling, “Don’t let her take me! Don’t let her take me! I know where she will take me!”

    Up until then I had assumed her barbies simply got into heated arguments about why she had been gotten in trouble for something. I now have to reassure her frequently that I don’t let ghosts in the house and I won’t let anyone take her.

    Backstory: we had temporarily rented a house while ours was renovated. Old house from 1902. I’m a single mom with 2 kids so all this creepy talk kept me up at night for 4 months! Further research lead to me finding out 2 people had committed suicide in the house and 1 died under “suspicious circumstances” and the skeleton of a young girl was found in what used to be the back alley, which had since became my backyard.

    Needless to say, I’m very happy our new home is in the newer part of town!

CREEPY SDL_ICON 1901
Awesome SDL_ICON 37
Meh SDL_ICON 214
2152 votes so far.
  • 16. My child once told me:

    “If I were you, I’d be afraid to go to sleep tonight.”

CREEPY SDL_ICON 1928
Awesome SDL_ICON 87
Meh SDL_ICON 240
2255 votes so far.
  • 17. My 7-yr-old daughter asked me if I'd ever eaten a spider...

    I said no. She said, “But they’re good for you and full of protein!” I asked why on earth would I want to eat a spider. She cryptically replied, “because then we’d have something to talk about, wouldn’t we?”

CREEPY SDL_ICON 459
Awesome SDL_ICON 977
Meh SDL_ICON 800
2236 votes so far.
  • 18. When my daughter was 4...

    She once started saying (very seriously) “in twenty one, we’re all gonna die”… I was completely freaked (in 21 days? In the year 2021??) but couldn’t get anything more.

CREEPY SDL_ICON 1215
Awesome SDL_ICON 101
Meh SDL_ICON 634
1950 votes so far.
  • 19. Several years ago...

    My 2-year-old told his 4-year-old sister he was going to pop off her head and crack out all her bones.

CREEPY SDL_ICON 1069
Awesome SDL_ICON 191
Meh SDL_ICON 646
1906 votes so far.
  • 20. I asked: ``Why did you pull the head off of that doll?``

    “So I could see where the voices were coming from.”

CREEPY SDL_ICON 2075
Awesome SDL_ICON 142
Meh SDL_ICON 109
2326 votes so far.

Um.

Yeah.

Creepy.

And hilarious.

And sometimes a mixture of both. Hahaha.

Dan Pearce, Single Dad Laughing

PS. Would love for you to submit your own stories below. Oh, and if you want a whole lot more of this “Creepiest Things Ever Said by Kids” series, well. There’s the link to all of them.

Dan Pearce, Single Dad Laughing

What is the creepiest thing you've ever heard a child say?

1
2
Previous articleCarrival: The Best Game to Play in the Car with Kids
Next articleYour Certainly Write About That Won
Dan Pearce is an American-born author, app developer, photographer, and artist. This blog, Single Dad Laughing, is what he's most known for, with more than 2 million daily subscribers as of 2017. Pearce writes mostly humorous and introspective works, as well as his musings which span from fatherhood, to dating, to life, to the people and dynamics of society. Single Dad Laughing is much more than a blog. It's an incredible community of people just being real and awesome together!