The Dating Life

I Met Someone…

You know how when you meet someone really special, you just know that they’re going to be around for a while? Well, I kind of just know that Brandy Girl is gonna be around for a while.

First Date Carnage

Last night I went on a date with a very *interesting* girl. It was the first time I’ve ended up bleeding profusely from my face while my date stood over me laughing maniacally.

Should we all boycott Valentine’s Day?

The DJ on the radio said we should all boycott Valentine's Day. So, let's be real. Some of it is whack. Everything does double in price. But... is there something bigger at play?

Quit Being So Damn Manly

“What’ll it be?” the bartender asked me. I looked around at the people surrounding me. A beautiful blonde. A tall good looking brunette. A guy with pecs that could crush me between them should I let my gaze linger too long.

“I’m still a lot closer to love than you are.”

Yesterday I posted Goodbye Brain, Hello Heart. The response was what I thought it would be. Bravos and Boos. Today I share my follow up response to that.

Goodbye brain. Hello heart.

My brain has really done a number on me, constantly analyzing and hurting my relationships. But then something happened that finally made me say goodbye to my brain and hello to my heart.

The two kinds of people with crappy pasts.

I've been divorced.Twice.Ouch.Would you believe that sometimes people judge me 100% on that stand-alone fact and nothing else?I'm actually betting you would believe it because you know that that's just how human beings are.We judge each other on whatever surface events have happened in the past. Good crap, that doesn't make sense to me.I've been on several dates with beautiful women. I can't tell you how many times it has been brought up that I've been divorced not just once, but twice now, and whatever interest might have been there simply disappears. It's as if somebody who is divorced once is "probably okay." Divorced twice, uh uh. There's obviously a reason this guy can't hold it together. Right?Even here on the internet, those who love tearing me down point to the fact that I've been divorced twice as if it will prove that I'm a phony. They think it will prove that I'm a jerk. They think it will prove...

That Dang Dating Website Awkwardness

Well, why the heck not... I've officially joined a dating website. I won't tell you which one. I'll only tell you that it rhymes with patch bot dom.Ever since my last relationship ended a couple months ago, I decided to go on a "woman fast." No women, no dating, no romance. At least not until I felt like my heart could handle another good bludgeoning.Good crap, dating websites are awkward. There's nothing about them that isn't awkward. I mean, think about it.I know I've told people that there isn't the same stigma with meeting people online as there used to be. But there is still a stigma."Where'd you two meet, anyway?""Online.""Oh."It's the ultimate conversation killer. Don't ask me why. Maybe because there's never some romantic story to go with it."It was so sweet, he clicked the wink button, and then he sent me a note, and then we chatted on IM, and then we totally fell in love."Yeah, just doesn't...

The Fall of Man

Man with game pad playing videogame. - The Fall of Man
Remember when Eve handed it to Adam in the shorts, guys? I think the bible may have had it *slightly* wrong. Now, fast forward to modern times... If we keep these trends up, women will take over the entire world and they'll soon realize they don't really need us "men" at all.

And THAT is why we don’t staple our fingers…

Wendy and I were both being uber cranky with each other and I felt a need to make her laugh so that we could move past it. Now, I'm 31-years old. I'm not an idiot most of the time. I am rational. I don't do stupid things (most of the time). But for some reason I had this thought that pretending to staple my finger would make Wendy laugh...

I don’t want to be your counselor. I want to be your date.

Please note, I wrote this post some time ago before I started dating Fabulous Wendy. Hopefully that disclaimer will save me from getting my butt fabulously kicked. Anyway...Maybe it's my curse in life. Maybe I bring it on myself. Maybe I just want to whine about something today.I try to date as often as possible. Finding dates is not the tricky part. What's tricky is not getting burnt out doing it. In all honesty, I never dreamed that I'd be in a position where dating was tough because of "who I was." I never thought I'd have to worry about the reasons why somebody was dating me, and how genuine any relationship actually was. But, that's another post for another day.It seems like the majority of dates I go on end up by the end of date one (or no later than date two) in deep discussion over personal issues, ways of thinking, and life situations. Because most...

Trapped within the Walls of a Guarded Heart

After my divorce in 2010, there wasn’t much left of me that could still be considered intact. My thoughts were obscured and darkened. My laughter gone. My eyes no longer moist. My tears were all spent trying to save the marriage. I had none left, it seemed, to...

If you’re fat… I’m fatter.

Since getting back into the dating game, I've noticed something interesting. I don't know if this is true for everybody or even most people, but it's certainly true for me, and that something is this... If an already slender girl (or even average girl) that I'm out with talks about feeling or being fat, it makes me feel really fat.Most of the time I'm very comfortable with who I am, my body type, etc. I'm generally very comfortable with the knowledge that my weight always has and always will fluctuate, sometimes to the too slender side and sometimes to the all-out-chubby side. As a general rule, this swing in weight doesn't really hit me too much because most of the time I'm happy at any weight within my greater range and I always know that I'm a few good decisions away from finding that health equilibrium again.But a couple of times it has happened (both times were while I was in...

Just say you’re not interested!

Warning: today is a Single Dad Ranting post, and I have a serious question to pose. Why don't people just say they're not interested in something instead of completely ignoring you?A couple months ago, I texted a girl and asked her on a date (this is the one I mentioned turned me down flat). Before that text, we had been sending texts back and forth pretty flirtatiously, but the second I asked her out, it just stopped. Dead... air... I sent her a couple more humorous texts here and there, still nothing.It was almost 24 hours later that she finally wrote back and said she didn't see us ever moving beyond friendship. Ok... just say that to begin with instead of making me stew for a day! Of course, she did reply, which was nice. Sometimes people (dating, or other areas of life) just ignore things completely and indefinitely. I don't understand why.A couple months ago, I was working...

Things You Should Never Say to Someone Who’s Single

En EspañolWell, once again I asked you for some awesome material for a blog post, and you delivered! The question I put on the Facebook Wall for today's post was, "What are the things people say to single people that are rude or ignorant?" A lot of awesome answers came through. Enjoy (along with my own and some of your slightly snarky retorts).So, why are you single? Ummm, maybe because I don't shower and I hate puppies. Just have fun with it! Thank you. You've just solved all my problems. I was purposefully NOT having fun with it. Have you tried online dating? Match.com didn't work so I guess my next move is Craigslist. It just wasn't meant to be. Thank you. I've been hoping to find somebody who knows the complete plans of the universe. So tell me, all knowing, who IS meant to be? It will happen when you least expect it. How can I expect it less than never? There are plenty of fish in the sea. Thank you...

Time vs. the Worthless Heart

A heavy and different look at my failed marriages, and the way time (and my race against it) played a giant role in them ending...

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