Read, Think, Debate

Worthless men and the women who make them

En EspañolAs with the Worthless Women post, I feel that some more strong words need to be said today. I'll try to keep today's post "less long". I hope that by the end, the message comes together and these words will get both the men and women who read it to step back and at least think about a few things.Because, we have a problem.Men are lousy husbands.Men are scatter-brained. Men are stupid. Men aren't capable of making good choices.Men aren't good enough in their religions. Men aren't good enough in their spirituality. Men aren't strong enough in their faith.Men are terrible cooks. Men don't help enough around the house.Men are careless.Men work too much. They also don't work enough.Men don't bring in large enough incomes. Men don't properly support their families. Men don't give their everything for their family's well-being.Men aren't ambitious enough.Men only care about sex. They have way too big or way too small of sex...

Thanksgiving mayhem

Thanksgiving. It'll be here in two days, you know. I wonder... Why do we Americans love it so much?And it's not just that we love it. We jump through amazingly difficult hoops to be a part of it. We travel from all corners of the earth to sit down at a single meal with those we care for most. My brother and his family traveled here all the way from England this year. I personally have made many long drives across state borders to take my seat at the annual family event.For couples, the question of whom to grace with their presence is often a touchy rivalry. Who's turn is it this year. Who will be offended by not going. Is it possible to hit both sets of in-laws. Would it be enticing, feasible, or even possible to take part in a major feast at multiple abodes...Thank you Walmart for not giving us the boot when westarted stacking all of...

Hundred dollar jeans

Have you ever bought yourself a pair of hundred dollar jeans? If you're like most people, the answer is no, followed by, are you crazy?I remember a few years ago I was at the mall with a good friend. He said he wanted to hop into a designer clothing store and buy some jeans. I watched with jaw dropped as he grabbed a pair of jeans with a price tag that read $105.00. I laughed and asked him why he would blow such unnecessary money on jeans when he could run down to American Eagle and get some pretty stylish ones for $35. I'll never forget his reply."Dan, have you ever spent a hundred dollars on a pair of jeans?" I said no and again voiced how absurd it was. "Well, try it sometime and then let's have this talk again." Our next stop was American Eagle, where I bought a couple of $35 pairs of jeans that both looked great...

The small side of the numbers

En EspañolToday's post is very important and personal to me.Last Friday, a handful of events took place in my life, all of which seemed insignificant to me at the time. But then, as I pieced together the scattered rubble of thoughts that followed, some very profound concepts and truths began to form.I spent that day with a close friend who had just completed an intense three-month program at a renowned residential treatment center for women with eating disorders. I found myself lost in deep and poignant conversation with her as I often do.At one point in the discussion, she mentioned that her eating disorder was something she would have to struggle with for the rest of her life. I asked her if she really believed that. She said she did. I asked her why. She said it's what she'd been taught by the people who know. I asked her who those people were. She said her counselors. I asked her what the...

The Parable of the First Responder

When a police officer came across a horrific accident, he froze for fear of being judged by the bystanders there. Eventually, a newcomer to the scene had had enough...

Nervous? Here’s a pretty awesome trick.

Do you ever get nervous about something? I know I do. Today, I want to share a simple trick with you that has helped me overcome that in just about every situation.You see, I know the terror that can quickly flood a person's body at the thought of public speaking. I know the adrenaline that makes one want to run. I know the sweat that starts to dampen one's brow as a big moment approaches. I know the dry mouth. I know the jitters. I know the shakes.I remember in High School, I wanted to do something I'd never had the guts to do. Try out for a solo in choir. To do this meant going in front of 150 of my peers and singing. Alone. All... by... myself.The first time the opportunity came up, I knew the solo was a little too high for me. But, for some reason, I still walked down and stood in line. When...

The Delusion of Normal

We all want to be "normal." Well, most of us do. But look at these simple charts I made and tell me if you still do or not. Because I sure don't.

My dancing black duck

As I mentioned yesterday, I have a black duck, and it's dancing.I've always wanted to be one of "those guys" on the dance floor. You know, the guys whose bodies magically pop and glide to the music? The guys who are surrounded by lady-folk and men-folk alike because they're so much fun to watch? The guys who, well, they just know how to dance?I always felt too fat to dance in high school. In college, I dropped a lot of the weight, and along with it my hesitation to let loose on the dance floor. I didn't just start dancing, I started dancing hard and often. I didn't care what I looked like. I had fallen in love with the adrenaline rush that came with bouncing to the music. I found myself at dance clubs and dance-offs every weekend. I was addicted. I was hooked. I couldn't get enough of it.Then, just six words from someone I loved stopped me...

Before the number changes

I hope you don't mind if I share a few of my more abstract thoughts with you today. I hope that sharing those thoughts will get you thinking. I really hope that I stitched this all together in a way that actually makes some sort of sense. Today's post got kind of long in a hurry. It is an interesting way to look at how we view things. Certainly not science. Certainly nothing that I expect to change the world. In fact, it won't offend me in the slightest if you move on and come back tomorrow. For those of you who do stay, let's get a little crazy together, because there are some pretty awesome things to think about.You see, because of the way we talk, sometimes I feel like none of us exist.We clump our entire lives into time periods. We use words like "yesterday", "today", and "tomorrow" to do it. We talk about "next month" or...

Who laughs at their own jokes?

This photo of my brother and me has absolutely nothing to do with anything.  Okay, some more strong words need to be said today. There is a peculiar disease rotting away at the core of our society. There is a social boundary that has been severely breached. People are committing nefarious acts under our very noses, and it's time we put a stop to it.I am speaking to those of you who have the audacity, the audaciousness, and the intrepidity to laugh at your own jokes.How dare you. WHAT?! Are you kidding me? Not laugh at your own jokes? How absurd would that be?My entire life, I've been one of "the funny ones". Sure, sometimes I get deep and personal here at SDL, but when I'm at game night with my friends every week, it takes us twelve hours to play something as simple as Balderdash because every one of us gets sucked into a never-win rivalry of witticism. I wouldn't have it any other way.What...

Worthless Women and the Men who Make Them

Strong words need to be said today. Please hear me through to the end because we have a problem... Women are ugly... Women are fat... Women are...

Saturday’s Heroes – Mr. Ledbetter

Today's hero was not disabled. He was not nominated for his calm face in the silver lining of calamity or sickness. He was not a celebrity, nor did he ever wish to be. But, he did change the world, even if in small ways. He did it quietly. He did it with passion. He did it in ways that perhaps he never would know. His name was Mr. Ledbetter. He died in July of 2005.Mr. Ledbetter was a professor of literature in Dumas, Texas. And, doing what good teachers do best, he worked each day to install his own passions into the hearts and souls of his pupils. His life was words, and for 41 years, he lived and breathed them with unending enthusiasm at his community college. His was a job uncoveted by most. He understood going into it, that the majority of his students would have little interest in what he was offering. He knew from the beginning that for most, a seat...

Less talk. More walk.

I'm a little peeved right now. Who am I kidding? I'm really peeved right now. I'll get to that. First, I thought I'd better clarify a couple things...

Step away from the scale.

I'm just going to say it. We have a teenie tiny problem going on right now. But we're not the ones to blame. We've been set up. We've been manipulated. That's right...

Saturday’s Heroes – Carissa

Carissa. She is and always will be my greatest inspiration and number one hero. She is my sister. She died a few years ago. I had the privilege of giving the eulogy at her funeral. Some of those words have been intermingled here.Carissa had Down's Syndrome, but she never once let that define her. In fact, the only word that could ever define her is love. Her funeral offered indisputable evidence of just how far her love for others had spread. The room in which we held her services seated 750 or so. Many had to stand along the walls or listen from the hallways because there simply weren't enough seats for everyone. I have been to many funerals. I have never seen one with that kind of turn-out. I remember struggling to put her life into words that could accurately express who she was and what she was about. Truth be told, Carissa’s shining life and example really couldn't...

The road that led from there to here.

Just to warn you, today's post is not a highly polished masterpiece. It is more of a personal journal that I am using to sort out a few of my thoughts.  I hope you will find power in it still.The last few nights I have been seriously contemplating the person that I now am, and I thought I'd bring you along for the ride. What I am about to write is very honest. Perhaps too honest. I share it in hopes that for some it will be the catalyst they need to look inside of themselves and examine the very things that I have had to examine since starting this blog.As an adult, I've always been a "good guy". I've always tried to be kind. I've always tried to love and help others. I've always been a good dad. I've always tried to be a good husband. I have always been extremely passionate about the things in which I...

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