Read, Think, Debate

Yeah, right. You just want beer.

Trust. It's an interesting thing, when you think about it.You pull up to an intersection and a man dressed in filthy Levis and a tattered shirt approaches your window. He is holding a sign that says "Homeless. Anything Helps". You pretend not to see him and think to yourself, yeah right. You mean anything will help you go buy some beer. The light changes and you drive away.I know I've done and thought that.You are standing in line at the supermarket. A different man, this time very well dressed with neatly combed hair, reaches out and touches your baby's fingers, He smiles at your child and says "you are a real cutie, aren't you". You quickly find a way to move the cart out of his reach and think, get your child molesting paws away from my kid.I know I've done and thought that.A friend you haven't heard from for years, calls you out of the blue and starts...

This Dad, That Dad

Did you know that my kid has another dad? His name is Jeff. Besides us both being dads to Noah, the two of us don't have a whole lot in common. You see, this dad gets to...

What should the bullied do?

I felt a need to post a follow-up tonight to the last two bullying posts. While the majority of the response to both posts has been extremely positive, there seems to be something that keeps being stated by those in opposition.When my child is being bullied, I will not teach him to try and befriend or love the bully.Please re-read the articles. I never asked him to do so, nor would I. The reason I shared my own story was to demonstrate that children who are being viciously bullied are not in a proper frame of mind. They are generally incapable of making rational choices or decisions. Their minds are spinning with only the unhealthiest of thoughts.No, we can not expect the bullied to end this problem. They can't do it.The major point of both posts was that we have the power to end it. Mothers, fathers, grandparents, teachers, friends, peers, youth advisers, pastors, and neighbors. We can end it. We must...

Bullies. “Their Not Even Human”

After publishing a memoir about the bullying I received, thousands of comments poured in. Some were heart breaking. others broke my heart in a totally different way.

The real way to get more followers to your blog.

The number one question of almost all bloggers (and a big one I get asked a lot lately) is, how do I get more followers? Nobody really knows how many blogs are in the world, but I've read "current" numbers starting at 50,000,000 and even as high as 150,000,000. Whatever the number, that's a lot of zeros to compete with.Picture a bookshelf, twenty miles wide and twelve feet tall, crammed with people's personal journals and memoirs. You just added yours to the very middle of it, and now you're standing on the sidelines with 150,000,000 other people, watching lookie-loos choosing one here, choosing one there, just hoping that they'll stop and choose yours.Kind of interesting to think of it that way, isn't it? Here's the thing. You can stand out from the crowd. It is possible.When I started Single Dad Laughing, I looked up lots of websites which all claimed to know the tricks of building a blog quickly....

Break away, parents.

Let me start out today by saying I am not a parenting guru. I am not somebody who can always tell you the right way to do everything. In fact, I am so far from the perfect parent that I often find myself wondering if whatever I just did was straight-up idiocy. Like the time I told Noah to jump down to me from the fourth story balcony. Nah, that one was probably fine. I was there to catch him, after all. I do have my less than ideal times though, I'm just going to have to think really hard to remember any.That being said, I also have learned a few amazing tricks that I'll share with you all from time to time. I hope that's okay. Use them, or don't. There are a lot of right ways to do a lot of things. One question I'm commonly asked is, how can I spend more time with my...

GASP! Nyquil to your kid?!

Haha, it's time for some serious fun around here, so why not a bonus post today!I think it's funny how the more popular Single Dad Laughing gets, the more people are trying to tear it down and declare it all as phony.In the early days of the blog, it was almost ALL about the sarcastic humor and writing. Six weeks ago, something extremely unforseen and significant happened in my family, and I realized that I had been using my voice for the wrong things (not just on my blog but in life). I had been causing a lot of problems in society instead of healing them. That's when I tackled the "Perfection" idea.And yes, I said six weeks ago. People and their perspectives can drastically change in very short periods of time when something drastic happens in their lives, especially to those they love.Since then, I've made it my point to harness that hurt I have been carrying for so many years....

Memoirs of a Bullied Kid

I don't recall any serious heartache or sadness during my first 10 years of life. But in 5th grade, all that changed. This was my story and my thoughts on bullying.

And we wonder why “Perfection” is such a problem.

Thankfully, this post was written to less than 0.05% of you, and yet it still needs to be said. To the overwhelming majority of you, thank you for your incredibleness. Thank you for taking yesterday's post (click here to read it if you haven't) in the spirit and perspective in which it was intended. More than 100,000 people visited the post in its first day, a new record here at SDL.Everybody else. Put away your halos. And please, put away your pitch forks while you're at it.First of all, I do not apologize for or take back anything that I wrote in yesterday's post. That post is perhaps the most powerful and honest work I have ever written. I actually wrote that piece before the "Perfection" piece, and two days ago when I reread it, its power unexpectedly overtook me. I wept for the better part of fifteen minutes (for some reason I've been really weepy the last few...

You Just Broke Your Child. Congratulations.

I feel a need to write this after what I witnessed a father do at Costco yesterday... Parents. And especially some of you dads. Stop breaking your children. Please.

Ummm… really? Like, really really?

Okay, this image, is only so that the next image isn't the one that shows up in everybody's Facebook feed when they share this story. Plus, people love pictures of cats doing funny things (they do! Read this post if you don't believe me).So, I thought I'd throw out a bonus post today, only because I am seriously irked and I need to vent somewhere! Warning, this post contains slightly graphic images, all in the name of parenting and decency.I have two computer screens hooked up to my computer at home. Last night I was sitting with Noah on my lap, and on one screen we were going through Bing images, finding pictures of "gray things" (every week he has to take an assortment of cut-out pictures to preschool, focusing on the color of the week).On the other screen, Facebook was open from my previous session on the computer. While I was cheating and typing in "silver" instead of "gray" (let's...

The CURE for “Perfection”

Please note that this is a follow-up to another post. If you haven't read The disease called "Perfection", please do that first. It will change you. Then, please read this post in its entirety, because I need your help.I have written thousands upon thousands of words over the course of multiple drafts for this follow-up. None of them felt right. None of them felt honest. None of them felt adequate. I threw them all out.If I'm being completely honest, I failed. I failed to find a way to respond to the now more than 800 comments, many of which have left me weeping and hurting in ways I never thought I could. I have failed at figuring out how to write a single, healing response to all of it. I have been trying to figure out what the cure for "Perfection" really is, and then say it in 2,000 words or less.But, in the end, I realized that I am incapable. I realize that we are all...

The disease called “Perfection”

As a warning, the following post was written in complete desperation. I have recently learned some very sobering truths from people that I love dearly. These truths have set in motion a quest...

Did that happen to you when you were a kid?

So, lately Noah has been obsessed with being "big and tough". I don't know if it was brought on because the girls split,  or because he's started school, or simply because he's getting to that age where little boys have to be tough. He loves to tell me about the times that he didn't cry about something. I try to tell him, "it's okay to cry, buddy. If you're really sad you can cry." But he always scrunches his chin to his chest, furrows his brow, and declares that only babies cry.It's really fun to listen to him begin to think more abstractly as he tries to cope with everyday life. He hates feeling like common mishaps happen to him just because he's small, so his new favorite question he asks me is, "did that happen to you when you were a kid, daddy?"When he accidentally spills his drink, he quickly looks up like I'm going to be angry...

How much did YOUR kid cost?

Somebody had the nerve to ask me right in front of my son, "how much did he cost?" So, please listen up. When adoption is involved... never say these 11 things.

Validation

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When asked for parking validation, one parking attendant was thinking of another kind of validation altogether.

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Proof that if there’s a god… he has a sense of...

Imagine my surprise when I opened my door and some baby-face teenager was holding out something I wanted SO bad, but at that moment I couldn't have.

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