Single Dad Laughing by Dan Pearce http://www.danoah.com You! Keep being awesome! Fri, 24 Oct 2014 17:29:59 +0000 en-US hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=4.0 Wow. Look at the Sky Now. http://www.danoah.com/2014/10/wow-look-at-the-sky-now.html http://www.danoah.com/2014/10/wow-look-at-the-sky-now.html#comments Fri, 24 Oct 2014 17:15:53 +0000 http://www.danoah.com/?p=46972 dan-pearce-old-bedI'm in England, sitting on my old bed reading love letters from my girlfriend. It's such a different feeling vs. my hate and anger toward girls 18 years ago...]]> dan-pearce-old-bed

current-view

See that? That’s my current view.

I’m laying, propped against the cracked oak headboard of the same bed either my brother or I slept on as a teenager. Outside, the English fall is quickly turning to winter. This island is cold and wet and drab this time of year, yet there is something magical about it. Maybe it’s the moss covered rooftops. Maybe it’s the way the moisture makes all the blacks blacker and the whites whiter. Maybe it’s simply because it’s not like the place I come from, where everything is dry, boring, and seemingly the same.

Maybe it’s because being away from home makes home all the more incredible. Having a chance to miss my child and my girlfriend makes our relationships all the more powerful. Having a chance to miss my routines, and my places I go, and the stops I usually make has a way of making me realize just how fantastic my everyday has become. Maybe it’s because going without all the creature comforts and gadgets and unnecessary amenities I have afforded myself over the years makes me realize how blessed I am to have them all.

Hm.

Continue reading: Wow. Look at the Sky Now.

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Humaning is Hard http://www.danoah.com/2014/10/humaning-is-hard.html http://www.danoah.com/2014/10/humaning-is-hard.html#comments Tue, 21 Oct 2014 06:01:58 +0000 http://www.danoah.com/?p=46930 dan-pearceI’m Dan Pearce. I don’t need help. I am solid. I have my life under control. I am with it. I am good enough. I am awesome. Or so I thought...]]> dan-pearce

dan-pearceI am Dan Pearce.

I don’t need help.

I am solid. I have my life under control. I have a beautiful mind. I am with it. I am good enough. I am strong enough. I am successful. I am awesome.

I am Dan fucking Pearce.

Or so I thought…

“Are you kidding me right now?”

That’s precisely when I knew I wasn’t Dan fucking Pearce at all. I knew it when I heard those words come baffled and indignant out of my sister-in-law’s mouth, aimed at me.

For quite some time now, I have been forgetting such random things. I’ve been forgetting big and important things that people tell me. Important stories from people’s pasts. And so many little things, too… People’s names. Sometimes even the fact that I met them at all.

Until that point, I was able to brush every forgetful moment away and blame it on a stressed mind. I was able to pin it on working too much, or being spread to thin.

But those words cut deep. “Are you kidding me right now?”

I looked over at my girlfriend. I saw this look in her eyes that said the same thing. Are you kidding me right now?

Nobody forgets something like what I had just forgotten. Nobody forgets something like that.

Nobody forgets if their own brother has been married before.

But I did

Continue reading: Humaning is Hard

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25 More of the CREEPIEST Things Ever Said by Kids http://www.danoah.com/2014/10/25-more-of-the-creepiest-things-ever-said-by-kids-4.html http://www.danoah.com/2014/10/25-more-of-the-creepiest-things-ever-said-by-kids-4.html#comments Mon, 20 Oct 2014 06:01:51 +0000 http://www.danoah.com/?p=46922 Doll issued a sea shoreALL NEW! If you have kids, you know that sometimes they say things that creep you the heck out. These are 25 (more) of my favorite "creepy" kid stories.]]> Doll issued a sea shore

Doll issued a sea shore

JUST IN TIME FOR HALLOWEEN!!!

Over on the SDL Facebook wall, I once asked you what the creepiest thing was that you’ve ever heard a kid say.

I had no idea what to expect. What I got would floor me.

And from that… the most creepy, most amazing, series was born. Enjoy today’s batch of stories, brought to you by you. They’re…. amazing

Continue reading: 25 More of the CREEPIEST Things Ever Said by Kids

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WTF was THAT?! http://www.danoah.com/2014/10/wtf-was-that.html http://www.danoah.com/2014/10/wtf-was-that.html#comments Fri, 17 Oct 2014 16:39:59 +0000 http://www.danoah.com/?p=46954 wtf-was-thatNo, seriously. What the fadiddle was that? The most bizarre thing I've experienced in a very long time just happened to me...]]> wtf-was-that

wtf-was-that

No, seriously. What the fadiddle was that?

This morning I rolled out of bed like a sick walrus. Like I always do.

I put on my hoodie, careful not to zip my chest hairs into it. Like I often do.

I stumbled downstairs blindly guided toward the promise of caffeine. A necessary morning ritual if the world wants to survive my grogginess.

I first stopped and popped a massive handful of supplements and vitamins. It’s a handful that gets bigger the older I get.

I tossed them in my mouth all at once like a true badass. I always do this. I am a true badass.

Continue reading: WTF was THAT?!

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So… I’m Dating this Girl. http://www.danoah.com/2014/10/im-dating-this-girl.html http://www.danoah.com/2014/10/im-dating-this-girl.html#comments Thu, 16 Oct 2014 06:01:56 +0000 http://www.danoah.com/?p=46916 danSo… I’m dating this girl. That’s no secret. After Tuesday's post, though, I probably need to mention what *will* be a secret...]]> dan

danSo… I’m dating this girl. That’s no secret.

What will be a secret is all of the details surrounding it. How we met (it’s kiiiiind of a hilarious story)… All the moments we share (wow, there have been some doozies that would most certainly make great blogging)… All the twenty thousand reasons I’m in love with her (I’m just kidding. More like 52,617)… Etcetera, etcetera.

Wow. I’ve been flooded with emails and Facebook messages requesting I share with you all the juicy deets, especially after Tuesday’s post.

And you know what? I’ve taken a large and satisfying inhale with each well-intentioned message I’ve received, and I’ve relished the fact that our story is ours. It’s something we only share organically with our friends and loved ones as if I had no public following at all.

Believe me. Blogger-Dan wants to word splurge all of it all over all of you like a drunk boy on prom night. I want to show off my girl to the whole damn world. She’s pretty effing fantastic (and pretty effing pretty, too)

Continue reading: So… I’m Dating this Girl.

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Why “Eternity” is Such a Dangerous Thought http://www.danoah.com/2014/10/why-eternity-is-such-a-dangerous-thought.html http://www.danoah.com/2014/10/why-eternity-is-such-a-dangerous-thought.html#comments Tue, 14 Oct 2014 06:01:38 +0000 http://www.danoah.com/?p=46900 dan-pearce-aleighWe all want a happily ever after. We want to know what eternity looks like. But this is why that was really hurting me, and the irony I learned about it.]]> dan-pearce-aleigh

dan-pearce-aleigh

You know how everyone seems to love that little eternity symbol?

You know… the one that looks like this:

eternity-symbol

I’ve decided that this symbol, or more accurately that this idea, is one of the most mentally dangerous and self-destructive ideas that has ever spread across the tattoo parlors of the world.

I mean, it seems so romantic and lovely doesn’t it? The concept of eternity?

I thought so, too. Particularly when things first took off with my girlfriend in such fantastic and wonderful ways. Things were going so well, my thoughts were running away in such fantastic directions.

Could this girl be the one I’ve been looking for all my life?

Could this girl be the one I will grow old with?

Have I finally found my soul mate, my lover, my confidant, my everything?

Is this the girl who will finally give meaning to that eternity symbol for me?

She was thinking many of the same thoughts about me. Like I said, it was just going so well.

And those are all good things to think, right?

Wrong.

Let me tell you why those thoughts are complete rubbish

Continue reading: Why “Eternity” is Such a Dangerous Thought

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25 Hilarious Pregnancy Brain Moments http://www.danoah.com/2014/10/25-hilarious-pregnancy-brain-moments.html http://www.danoah.com/2014/10/25-hilarious-pregnancy-brain-moments.html#comments Mon, 13 Oct 2014 06:01:19 +0000 http://www.danoah.com/?p=46893 Amased pregnantBeing pregnant... they say it *does* things to your mind. Hahaha. And these 25 hilarious pregnancy brain moments will have you laughing. Big time.]]> Amased pregnant

Amased pregnantI have been around enough pregnant women to know that Pregnancy Brain is an incredibly real and awfully funny thing. So, I knew we would get some amazing replies when I asked this question on the SDL Facebook page:

What is the craziest thing you or your significant other has ever done while suffering from PREGNANCY BRAIN?

These are 25 of my favorite replies!

1. I cried when I didn’t make cookies for the nurses when I was in labor…

2. I was in a hurry one day, and weeks away from delivery… I left the house to take my son to school and run a few errands. It wasn’t until the cashier at the market said, did you know you have a towel on your head that I realized I hadn’t done my hair after a shower. I had gone to 2 other places like that before someone said something! I got in the car and cried.

3. Walked out of the house with everything including baby and baby accessories… everything except pants.

4. I went through a car wash with about 200 dollars worth of groceries in the back of the truck

Continue reading: 25 Hilarious Pregnancy Brain Moments

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The Truth About What’s Been Going On… http://www.danoah.com/2014/10/the-truth-about-whats-been-going-on.html http://www.danoah.com/2014/10/the-truth-about-whats-been-going-on.html#comments Thu, 09 Oct 2014 06:01:40 +0000 http://www.danoah.com/?p=46887 dan-noahSometimes the truth doesn’t hit me until after I’ve finally dealt with it. And this truth is a big one for me...]]> dan-noah

dan-noah

Sometimes the truth doesn’t hit me until after I’ve finally dealt with it.

As you know, a week ago I went on an SDL hiatus with a mooshy brain.

I didn’t know why I had gotten to that point. I didn’t really know how I had gotten to that point. All I knew was that I could not sit in front of a computer screen and write even one more word on my blog. It wasn’t brain farts or writer’s block. My head was just screaming at me, telling me things like, “I will f*** you up, mister, if you don’t give me a break and figure some things out.”

So, I listened, mostly because I most definitely didn’t want to get f***ed up by a complex blob of neurological tissue. I prescheduled a bunch of memes posts on Facebook, and I shut my computer down.

And, it was about four days into it when my brain finally told me the truth about why I was at the point I was at.

The truth was… I have bitten off more life than I can chew

Continue reading: The Truth About What’s Been Going On…

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Toodaloo for a Few http://www.danoah.com/2014/10/toodaloo-for-a-few.html http://www.danoah.com/2014/10/toodaloo-for-a-few.html#comments Thu, 02 Oct 2014 07:24:11 +0000 http://www.danoah.com/?p=46882 dan-pearce-breakI have a riddle for you. What happens when you are developing four different apps with developers who are all on the other side of the world? Answer... ]]> dan-pearce-break

dan-pearce-break

I have a riddle for you. What happens when you are developing four different apps with developers who are all on the other side of the world? Answer: your brain turns to mush after seven straight months of staying up into the wee hours of the morning every single night designing, discussing, testing, getting over language barriers, etc.

I need a break, my friends.

My mind is officially toast at the moment and I need to recharge it, or all you’re going to get here on SDL is blog posts of goo

Continue reading: Toodaloo for a Few

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Maybe Let’s Think Before We Google That http://www.danoah.com/2014/10/maybe-lets-think-before-we-google-that.html http://www.danoah.com/2014/10/maybe-lets-think-before-we-google-that.html#comments Wed, 01 Oct 2014 06:01:30 +0000 http://www.danoah.com/?p=46573 funny-google-auto-completes-26These 30 Google Auto-Completes are hilarious proof that we could stand to do a little more thinking on our own, BEFORE we Google for an answer.]]> funny-google-auto-completes-26

Yesterday I had a valid question. How quickly do I need to eat meat after it has been opened? So, I went where else but to Google to find my answer.

I never got to the answer though. Instead, Google told me what I should be looking for…

FIRST SEARCH

What cracks me up is that these auto-complete search terms are based on the most popular searches using the words I type in. I mean, come on. Do you really need to ask Google how often you need to change a poopy diaper? Do you really think Google knows how fast you need to run? Seems we could stand to do a little more thinking on our own, BEFORE we Google for an answer.

Anyhow, that whole thing just got me sucked in to finding funny Google auto-completes, and responding to them with a few questions of my own.

Let’s start with that one again…

FIRST SEARCH

MY QUESTIONS:
How quickly would you want someone to change YOUR poopy diaper if it was out of your control?
How quickly is the bear behind you running?

 

funny-google-auto-completes-01

MY QUESTIONS:
Why don’t you just ask them if they are married?
How close were you if you don’t know how dead they are?
If you know the person, why do you need to meet them on Tinder

Continue reading: Maybe Let’s Think Before We Google That

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The Reason We’re Getting Fatter is Not What We All Think http://www.danoah.com/2014/09/the-reason-were-getting-fatter-is-not-what-we-all-think.html http://www.danoah.com/2014/09/the-reason-were-getting-fatter-is-not-what-we-all-think.html#comments Tue, 30 Sep 2014 06:01:30 +0000 http://www.danoah.com/?p=46617 dan-pearce-fitnessI don't think it's the rise in fast food chains, or the move to sedentary jobs. I think it is something else altogether, and I think the answer is simple...]]> dan-pearce-fitness

dan-pearce-fitness

Okay. Do you see all of those workout selfies?

Yes, there are TONS of them.

Yes, they are all of me.

Me.

A guy who once tipped the scales at 350 lbs and who now loves this whole get-fit stay-fit world.

And those are only a fraction of all the workout selfies I’ve taken (and shared) the last 10 months or so.

Listen, friends. We have it ALL wrong.

For some reason, as a general population we are scared to post too many photos of ourselves doing AMAZING things on social media, especially in the health and fitness world.

And by AMAZING, I don’t mean reaching the top of Mount Everest, or base jumping from the Sears Tower. I mean the little AMAZING things we do every day, like move our bodies, and making healthy food choices, and being excited for our daily victories.

Goodness gracious. Have you looked at us lately? As a whole, we are getting fatter. And we are getting more unhealthy. And we are getting lazier. And even worse than that… we are teaching our kids this same lethargic lifestyle as we head down the slippery slope to Wall-Eville.

Politicians have fought endlessly about this epidemic and have found no solutions. Incredibly inspiring television shows have not begun to even dent what’s going on. Talk-shows have dissected it, endlessly and unsuccessfully. Bloggers have blogged about it. And nothing has changed. We are still getting heavier per capita, every single year. And I think I know why.

It isn’t the rise in fast food chains on every corner. It isn’t the covers of magazines. It isn’t the fact that the job force has shifted more heavily to sedentary jobs.

No, the problem isn’t any of that

Continue reading: The Reason We’re Getting Fatter is Not What We All Think

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Screaming Babies. On Airplanes. http://www.danoah.com/2014/09/screaming-babies-on-airplanes.html http://www.danoah.com/2014/09/screaming-babies-on-airplanes.html#comments Mon, 29 Sep 2014 15:58:48 +0000 http://www.danoah.com/?p=46876 Crying babyThe airline seated me right next to a screaming baby. And tell me if I'm right, but there is only one thing parents of screaming babies on planes wanna hear...]]> Crying baby

Crying babyEvery Monday I free-write whatever comes to mind.

I can’t promise you quality. I can’t promise you the feels. I can’t promise you anything, really. Except that it will always be raw, it will always be unedited, it will always be all over the place, and it will always be me. Oh, and it will always be done in my pajamas. Always. Because that’s how I roll.

Hmmm. What to talk about today…

How about… I don’t know… ­babies on airplanes?

Last weekend my girlfriend and I hopped on a plane bound for Phoenix. The flight is barely over an hour. And, since we bought last minute tickets, we weren’t sitting together. I was stuffed in a middle seat somewhere back in the back of the plane. She was some ten rows up, in that same middle seat. God, I hate middle seats.

To my right was an icky, icky man. He exuded sexuality. He also exuded the creepy “I kill people in the woods and stew them up with squirrels” look. Still, I tried to talk to him and hear his story. All he wanted to do was tell me how he wished the window was a busty blonde whom he could lean against instead of such boring, cold plastic.

To my left was a new mother. She had a five or six month old on her lap, and she boarded the plane with a look that said, I’m ready for war.

Continue reading: Screaming Babies. On Airplanes.

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This is Beautiful You http://www.danoah.com/2014/09/this-is-beautiful-you-132.html http://www.danoah.com/2014/09/this-is-beautiful-you-132.html#comments Sun, 28 Sep 2014 06:01:09 +0000 http://www.danoah.com/?p=46811 beautiful-you-416Every Sunday I take the photos of you and the people you love, and I share them here because, well, I think we're all pretty dang beautiful.]]> beautiful-you-416

Finally, my favorite post of the week!

Every Sunday morning I take some of the photos that you have uploaded to the Single Dad Laughing Facebook wall, and I post them here.

I love This is Beautiful You because it gives me (and everyone else) an incredible glimpse of who we all are. It puts a face on the awesome people coming here. It gives us a beautiful idea of the uniqueness and diversity of the community here at SDL. And, more than anything, it shows all of us just how beautiful we each really are.

Thank you for sharing a small part of yourselves. It’s my honor to put the spotlight on you today. This is beautiful you.

beautiful-you-436

beautiful-you-435

Continue reading: This is Beautiful You

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Pulled from the Truth Box – Week 35 http://www.danoah.com/2014/09/pulled-from-the-truth-box-week-35.html http://www.danoah.com/2014/09/pulled-from-the-truth-box-week-35.html#comments Fri, 26 Sep 2014 06:01:26 +0000 http://www.danoah.com/?p=46634 Truth BoxRemember. We're all fighting our own great battles. These are the secrets you've never told anyone. And what everyone else believes is the truth.]]> Truth Box

truth box

“Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a great battle.” ~Philo of Alexandria

After 21 years of self-destructive inner-battles, I finally admitted my biggest secret to myself and to the rest of the world. That day, and the day my son was born, were the two most incredible and wonderful days of my life.

Here on Single Dad Laughing, I started what I call “The Truth Box.” I asked you all to anonymously share a difficult secret that you’ve never told anyone. There were only two sections to fill out on the form. “What everyone thinks is true,” and “what actually is true.” More than six thousand secrets were shared. Every month I try and share 60 of them here. Completely random and exactly as they came in.

These truths aren’t meant to entertain. They aren’t meant to bring us down, either. They’re just an incredible and poignant (though sometimes heavy) reminder that we all are fighting our own great battles.

Pulled from the Truth Box: Week 35

Continue reading: Pulled from the Truth Box – Week 35

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So, I Fibbed to My Kid… Vol. 2 http://www.danoah.com/2014/09/so-i-fibbed-to-my-kid-vol-2.html http://www.danoah.com/2014/09/so-i-fibbed-to-my-kid-vol-2.html#comments Thu, 25 Sep 2014 06:01:57 +0000 http://www.danoah.com/?p=46628 Woman and little girl sharing a secretI asked the question: "what is the funniest fib you've ever found yourself telling your child?" These were a few of your hilarious replies.]]> Woman and little girl sharing a secret

Woman and little girl sharing a secret

I asked an awesome question to ask over on the SDL Facebook page. “What is the funniest fib you’ve ever found yourself telling your child?”

Anyone who is a parent at all knows what it’s like to throw a random fib out from time to time because… maybe you just don’t want to deal with a half hour beg-fest. Or maybe you just aren’t ready to explain something. Or maybe you know that your child isn’t ready to have something explained. There rare a million reasons why little fibs can be totally legit.

And if there’s anything that I know, it’s that usually those little fibs are HILARIOUS! I stand behind you, fibbing parents, and I laugh with you as we tackle this thing called parenting together.

Here are your replies. Oh, and if you missed the first one, you can catch that here!

Continue reading: So, I Fibbed to My Kid… Vol. 2

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