ONE HUMAN PASS TO BE DEPRESSED
VALID TODAY ONLY, SO PLEASE USE IT!
The holder of this pass is entitled to be depressed today, for the entire day if needed, with absolutely no need to explain, apologize, or somehow fix it. This includes but is not limited to apathy, groaning, lazing around, complete lack of motivation, crummy thoughts, and unexplainable feelings of hopelessness, sadness, fatigue, or worthlessness.
The issuer of this “Human Pass” guarantees to do nothing but unconditionally love you and be there for you (or give you space) without judgment, need for further discussion, and without need for a dang thing in return. You’re human. And humaning is hard sometimes. Today, you get a pass on having to appear happy or put together. It’s totally okay.