The Sexual Corners into which We’re Painted

Painting Corner

Bisexuality.

Want to know something funny about it?

I don’t even know how real it is.

Whoa. I said it.

Me.

A guy who “kind of” came out as such a year and a half ago.

I mean. It’s real, bisexuality. Don’t get me wrong.

I just don’t know how real the label is. Or at least how permanent. Or at least how important. Or at least how understandable. And I want to offer my two cents today because if I’ve learned anything in my lifetime, and especially in the last year and a half, it’s that sexuality can be confusing as hell. And, that lots of people feel that way.

Here’s the thing. For most men, openly talking about not knowing what the hell they are when it comes to sexuality is the last thing they’d want to do. It just doesn’t seem like something a rational and sane man (or woman) would do. We live in a world where we want finite answers as to who all people are. We want all people to live in the black and white so that we can more fully understand them.

But for me, I don’t give a flying leap. I am who I am. And talking about it may not be of interest to most people, but an open discussion just might help those who are struggling. This is why I write. Not for the masses. But for the individuals.

Homosexuality. Bisexuality. Heterosexuality. Transexuality. A bunch of other sexualities.

To some degree labels are helpful. Sure. I concede that, as I’ve talked to many of my gay friends. They like having the label because it helps them know where they stand with people. The label helps them establish meaningful relationships with others who are like them. I see validity in that.

Where I have the problem is when the label traps us.

Let me explain.

I have come to believe that which I was told by so many people when I first “came out.”

Sexuality is fluid.

Sexuality will change over the course of your life.

Don’t trap yourself in.

That seemed so silly at first. How can a person’s sexuality change? I don’t know. But it does. And not just for me. But I’ll start with me.

I am straight.

Most of the time.

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