Musings

My Trick to Stop Any Shit Talker Dead In His Verbal Tracks

Whether someone is talking shit to be funny or to try and hurt me, I have a little trick that works every single time to shut them up and stop them dead in their tracks...

I May Just Be the Great Dane of Humans

I am the Great Dane of Humans
What I'm writing today turned out to be a little morbid and twisted, kind of like the image I used for it, but hey. It's how I feel when I compare myself to dog breeds.

Your Tinder account is boring. Here are 9 ways to fix that.

I just got back on Tinder and I must say... Most Tinder profiles are *boring*. So today I've taken 9 really common Tinder statements and "spruced" 'em up a bit...

An Open Letter: Would REAL Friends Do That?!

This morning I discovered an atrociousness which has to have been noticeable for at least a month, yet not one person in my life cared enough to tell me...

6 Dirty, Dirty Habits Way Too Many People Around You Have

After sorting through thousands of weird confessions, it seems nearly the entire human population shares some of these most bizarre and dirty secrets...

A Letter to Men: The Lesson of the Saggy Burrito in My Pants

Very few men get to experience what it's like for a woman when it comes to "that time of the month." I unfortunately did, and I learned things I never expected.

The Seven New #Days of Facebook

Facebook has been around for a long time now, and it's time we spice things up by turning the 7 days of every week into THIS. You know. To keep it interesting.

Strange Things Are Seen in the City

I love people watching, and I have seen some really interesting people since moving to the city. This is a taste of some of the glorious weirdness I have seen...

Assking for Help

As I turned down the kindness and help of... everyone, at a time when I knew I really needed it, one specific moment made me realize that I have a problem...

Sitting Here, Wedged Between These Pillows

As I sit here struggling with my latest health battle, I watch from my window as a hurting homeless man passes below. And it makes me realize something...

The Butt of a Thousand Different Jokes

Wanna know how to immediately be the butt of a thousand different butt jokes? I guess just blog about having a hurt butt. These gems were among the many.

“Well, son… That was… Testosterone.”

New to the city, my scared (and now awake) child asked what had just shaken the entire house. Rather annoyed by it myself, I decided to tell him... the truth.

Oh, You Mormon Girls!

Living in Utah as a single non-Mormon has it's *ahem* funny moments. As is evidenced by this real conversation I had with a Mormon girl on Tinder...

When the World Finally Goes Dark

When the world goes dark. And quiet. And more or less disappears...

Must… Survive… Six. More. Days.

I have to be honest. I'm liking the Christmas season less and less as the years go on. These four stories from the past two days are a perfect example why...

I am a liar. Officially.

I... am... a liar. Officially. Today I lied to my son, and it wasn't just some little fib. I looked him in the eyes, and told him a bald... faced... lie.

Dan's Suggested Reads:

It Just Doesn’t Clique

How. How do I finally get into that dang clique? Oh, wait... Is it possible that what we all think are cliques are something else altogether?

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